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I've got no idea where to turn

rainbowtears Member Posts: 12 Listener
edited July 2019 in Work and employment
Hi all I'm not coping at all at mo and just dont know what to do,I've been working part time for years while dealing with anxiety and depression prob since my teens but started getting really bad  when I was 22 I'm 50 now,I also have severe oasteoartheritis neck low spine and fibro,after a nasty customer in work caused me to have a massive panic attack I haven't gone back even after 28 weeks sick,after meeting after meeting with work being tricked and lied to about changing my position in work to a position of the same but I could sit and work at my own pace instead of standing,having constant customer abuse and working at a fast pace,I was ready,ish to try my new position and called work for my back to work meeting to be greeting to a manager I didnt know,my union rep wasn't in there either and didnt think anything of it as it was back to work meeting,sat down to be told there is no job available for me in another place and would have to go back to my old job,I said I cant do that and as planned I was promised a transfer,I left very upset have been battling with dwp after **** up after **** up with medical evedence being not done when ordered and not knowing for 4 weeks as waiting for them to ring to collect it was done by the next day though as it was their mistake,I then gets my mandatory reconsideration letter back a day later unchanged as apparently I hadn't been in contact to say it be late even though I rang twice,was transferred to reconsideration manager who was nice and not happy it was done with no evedence and gave me another month,its gone in waiting for result now,in the meantime I had enough of work meetings and basically had no help from union rep as he was on their side as well I gave my notice on sick grounds,i set up a universal credit account online as cant claim esa as not paid enough nat insurance and thought my standard pip paid it,I'm at the end of my teather with all of it and dont know what to do next,my hubby also is paid to much to claim whatever it is I'm supposed to claim but our overheads are very high because of a health prob he has,had,his mental health is not good because of it and has had no help at all as hes never admitted he has,had it to gp,friends no one so cant ask him for advice as no clue either,I've been crying for over 2 hrs now with fear/frustration,I dont want to talk on the phone and people dont see me like this unless I'm at crisis point,can someone please stear me in the right direction by text/post so I can keep it or il forget everything im told ,I really just feel like giving up on all of it,so confused and fed up,sorry it's long and thankyoux


  • rainbowtears
    rainbowtears Member Posts: 12 Listener
    Sorry wrong section
  • Chloe_Scope
    Chloe_Scope Scope Posts: 10,565 Disability Gamechanger
    edited July 2019
    Hi @rainbowtears and thank you for taking the time to reach out to us. I'm sorry to hear about your job and benefits.

    Is the MR result that you are currently waiting to do with a PIP claim? Seeking face to face advice would be really beneficial. Citizen's Advice should be able to help. 

    Now you have left your job it may be difficult to do anything about how they handled the whole situation, which I imagine was very stressful. ACAS specialise in workplace discrimination and they may be able to advice you in terms of moving forward and if you'd be able to do anything regarding your previous role. Are you now medically retired?

    Here is the benefit calculator which may suggest what else you could be entitled to.

    I also would urge your husband to see a GP if he is struggling with his mental health, they'll be able to provide support and guidance.

    Thanks again for talking to us and I hope you'll be able to get things sorted soon and please keep us updated :)

  • rainbowtears
    rainbowtears Member Posts: 12 Listener
    Thankyou I've got all my paperwork together and going now to cit advice,will update laterx
  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Member Posts: 6,390 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @rainbowtears   Sorry to hear about every thing and please thank you for sharing.  You done the right thing contacting the forum.

    I do understand as do many of our community members.

    You mentioned mental health problems have you ever received any support for this?  When I mean support talking to a therapist or counselling.

    Have you ever considered looking at speaking to a mental health charity.  The problem with mental health is you need to talk to some one who understand and deal with you issues and problems.

    I used this one last time. Might not be in your area but do take clientele with additional disabilities as well as mental illness.


    They can help with looking at mental health wellbeing additional signposting and guidance with anything like benefits.  Plus floating support or an outreach worker.

    I think there comes a time when you need to make some choices. Sit down with some one like your husband makes some plans some decisions. 

    Looking at options and forward plans to cope and deal with what you have.

    The advantages and disadvantages being in your current employment status if this causing your problems.

    I know this might sound a drastic option but you do not have to suffer if it is causing you discomfort or pain having problems.

    Make some lists of your skills, abilities, talents and qualifications.  What is important is you to think of your needs not others.

    Your husband should be aware of getting help and support for his own needs.  He is responsible not you. I do understand do not wish to talk to GP but sometimes that might just help.

    Please can I add what makes you happy gives you reassurance and gives you a sense of purpose.  

    Make a list and review what any goals you have.

    Often by accessing support and finding what advice, guidance and information on your health conditions can be beneficial to your wellbeing.. Trying to manage conditions of any disability or illness.

    We are here to help and give what support you need.

    Please wish you well what ever you decide to do I just know have been their my own personal circumstances.

    Please take care.


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  • Chloe_Scope
    Chloe_Scope Scope Posts: 10,565 Disability Gamechanger
    I hope it goes well @rainbowtears :)

  • Ails
    Ails Member Posts: 2,256 Disability Gamechanger
    Wishing you well for the future @rainbowtears and please let us know if we can be of any further help to you.  All the best.  :smile:
    Winner of the Scope New Volunteer Award 2019.   :)
  • Adrian_Scope
    Adrian_Scope Posts: 8,178

    Scope community team

    Hope it goes okay @rainbowtears. Please let us know if there's anything else we can do. :smile:
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  • Tammyjane33
    Tammyjane33 Member Posts: 683 Pioneering
    @rainbowtears thankyou for sharing how you feel and turning to us for support as stated above myself and other community champions and other members are here for you to turn to. Hope things improve for you soon. 


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