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I guess that's why they call it the blues! How are you?

Cher_ScopeCher_Scope Posts: 3,404

Scope community team

edited January 18 in Coffee lounge

Today marks ‘Blue Monday’, the third Monday in January, given its unfortunate title because it is claimed to be the most depressing day of the year...


A notice saying I need cake because Monday on top of sheets on a bed


Why is today meant to be so sad?

This Independent Article tells us today is so blue because:
The theory goes that this is the time of year when we’re all cold, broke and riddled with guilt that our new year’s resolutions to get fit, drink less alcohol, and be a better human being have fallen by the wayside.

And of course in 2021, we're dealing with yet another lockdown on top of the annual January difficulties.
However, without any actual evidence to back it up, you could be forgiven for thinking Blue Monday is a PR stunt!

Beating the blues

If you are feeling down today, our community is here to support you - be it through giving you advice, having a natter or playing games.  Know you aren't alone.
If things are particularly rubbish, check out our Coping with stress, low mood and isolation support thread.  This has lots of resources to help pick you up,  while we would always recommend contacting your GP if your low mood has persisted for a while. 


How are you feeling?

  • Do you want to share how you're feeling today?  
  • What tips would you give to others who might be having a hard time?
Let us know in the comments below :)
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Replies

  • janer1967janer1967 Member Posts: 9,297 Disability Gamechanger
    I'm feeling good today but I do most of time 

    I could dwell on the things I can no longer do but it wouldn't change anything so I focus on doing what I can do to the best of my ability 

    My tip is to give yourself some me time however you ho about that to recharge things like 

    Reading,  music   tv  hot bath   facial   manicure chatting to friends 
  • 66Mustang66Mustang Community Co-Production Group Posts: 4,685 Disability Gamechanger
    I only have one main tip which is to do something about the reason you are feeling low, however this isn’t always possible as you aren’t always in control of what is making you feel low.

    It’s relevant if you are feeling low because of your job or you are in debt, you can do something about stuff like that, but if it’s caused by something you can’t control like a disability that can’t be fixed, I’m not really sure what you can do to ease the feeling of lowness.

    I would be interested to hear what tips other people have to share.
  • Cher_ScopeCher_Scope Posts: 3,404

    Scope community team

    janer1967 said:
    I'm feeling good today but I do most of time 

    I could dwell on the things I can no longer do but it wouldn't change anything so I focus on doing what I can do to the best of my ability 

    My tip is to give yourself some me time however you ho about that to recharge things like 

    Reading,  music   tv  hot bath   facial   manicure chatting to friends 

    Loving the positivity there @janer1967 There's definitely something to be said for having that time out purely doing what makes you happy. In my case, that's watching the Real Housewives of Cheshire, in the bath, while I have a sheet face mask on  :D
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  • Cher_ScopeCher_Scope Posts: 3,404

    Scope community team

    66Mustang said:
    I only have one main tip which is to do something about the reason you are feeling low, however this isn’t always possible as you aren’t always in control of what is making you feel low.

    It’s relevant if you are feeling low because of your job or you are in debt, you can do something about stuff like that, but if it’s caused by something you can’t control like a disability that can’t be fixed, I’m not really sure what you can do to ease the feeling of lowness.

    I would be interested to hear what tips other people have to share.
    @66Mustang Absolutely spot on. There's a saying, which I'm sure to misquote, along the lines of most of our unhappiness doesn't come from events but our reaction to them.  Now this clearly isn't always the case, say when you encounter barriers that disable you, but I know I've made things worse in the past by ruminating on elements beyond my control  :|

    I'd recommend people listen to uplifting podcasts as a means of countering sad thoughts and putting them into perspective.  Eckhart Tolle speaks a lot of spiritual wisdom (in my opinion) so try giving him a listen :)
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  • 66Mustang66Mustang Community Co-Production Group Posts: 4,685 Disability Gamechanger
    @Cher_Scope that’s a really good quote actually and I would tend to agree with it, the way I react to stuff definitely has a bearing on how it affects me, I am guilty of doing the same as you in the past as well, but I try to take bad news pragmatically and philosophically these days

    Thanks for the recommendation, he sounds quite interesting

    Another quote I like which is along similar lines (which I am sure I will also get the words slightly wrong) is that your life is like being dealt some playing cards - if you get dealt a rubbish hand you can still achieve stuff by playing your hand well :)
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,651 Listener
    Not really done much all day, just watched TV and made a few calls on the mobile.

  • leeCalleeCal Member Posts: 3,381 Disability Gamechanger
    edited January 18
    Sometimes feeling down Has a biochemical origin. Chocolate could help but is obviously not that healthy to indulge in too often, luckily though we do have a simple exercise which actually releases endorphins and feel good chemicals and that is smiling. Even when alone smiling can help in this way. 

    Another way to release those endorphins is through physical exercise whether smiling or not. 🙂🙂🙂
  • woodbinewoodbine Community Co-Production Group Posts: 3,804 Disability Gamechanger
    edited January 18
    I was so fed up this morning that as i ate my breakfast in the kitchen i looked up and thought b**ody hell it needs a coat of paint so i checked found some paint and i got half of it done will finish it off on tuesday after i've been to tesco on my own as senior management isn't too well atm, she's done me a detailed list in aisle order but doubtless i will come back with twice as much ! will be my first day out since 23rd dec.

    There are two stumbling blocks to all this though 1) i cant use a ladder due to my epilepsy and 2) i shouldn't go anywhere alone for the same reason but needs must when you can't get a delivery slot
    my advice is given freely and is correct to the best of my knowledge.
  • CressCress Member Posts: 498 Pioneering
    @woodbine you need to order yourself one of those long roller poles...and next time, just look out the window when you eat your breccy  lol
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 43 Courageous
    edited January 19
    The user and all related content has been deleted.
  • BrettWBrettW Member Posts: 607 Pioneering
    It was my birthday yesterday and the day I had my phone assessment. Started off with a lot of stress waiting to have the assessment but my partner made sure the rest of my day was great so it wasn't a 'Blue Monday' for me overall :smile:
  • leeCalleeCal Member Posts: 3,381 Disability Gamechanger
    Belated happy birthday @BrettW 🥳
  • vikingqueenvikingqueen Member Posts: 361 Pioneering
       Happy yesterday birthday @BrettW
  • Richard_ScopeRichard_Scope Posts: 2,733

    Scope community team

    Listen to Blue Monday by New Order very loud! Chase the blues away.
    Scope
    Specialist Information Officer - Cerebral Palsy

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  • woodbinewoodbine Community Co-Production Group Posts: 3,804 Disability Gamechanger
    BrettW said:
    It was my birthday yesterday and the day I had my phone assessment. Started off with a lot of stress waiting to have the assessment but my partner made sure the rest of my day was great so it wasn't a 'Blue Monday' for me overall :smile:
    how did the assessment go? and also a belated happy birthday from me
    my advice is given freely and is correct to the best of my knowledge.
  • BrettWBrettW Member Posts: 607 Pioneering
    thanks for the birthday wishes all :smile:
  • 66Mustang66Mustang Community Co-Production Group Posts: 4,685 Disability Gamechanger
    I hope you had a good birthday @BrettW :)
  • BrettWBrettW Member Posts: 607 Pioneering
    66Mustang said:
    I hope you had a good birthday @BrettW :)
    I did. Treated myself to a day of eating things I shouldn't really and am paying for it today lol
  • 66Mustang66Mustang Community Co-Production Group Posts: 4,685 Disability Gamechanger
    Ha ha I do that every day, well not so much this year, trying not to  :)
  • Cher_ScopeCher_Scope Posts: 3,404

    Scope community team

    Ahhh happy belated birthday @BrettW :) Glad to hear your partner made it a happy one for you!
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  • BrettWBrettW Member Posts: 607 Pioneering
  • GeoarkGeoark Member, Scope Volunteer Posts: 1,373 Disability Gamechanger
    For a number of reasons the last few days have not been good.

    Last week took a break from working and went to get a coffee. Going back to my work area I had a really stupid fall. As I was walking along my foot went into the gaming steering wheel, and with a heavy base by the time I realised what had happened there was nothing I could do as it was forcing me down. My ankle was realy painful, my wife was fussing around me and to top it all my boss was trying to ring me. The leg ballooned to twice its normal size and I was really struggling. The coffee was mainly over my face and neck somehow, but the cup ended up on the floor the right way up!

    Not so bad now, most of the swelling has gone, and my ankle is fine. Knee not so much, it keeps giving way, but even that is starting to improve.

    Took a long weekend off Thursday to Sunday, to give the leg a chance to recover. Returned to work yesterday with so much to do and by the end of the day I am feeling fatigued mentally and physically.  Yesterday went to sleep early and did not wake up again, so no food.  Went to sleep tonight around 6 and been up for a little while. So will need to try and get some more sleep so I can continue working tomorrow.

    On the bright side I have been able to joke about it all. At the weekend with no computer time and just resting I finally solved one of childhood's greatest mysteries. Do you know why all the kings horses and all the kings men could not put Humpty together again? Because they were too busy marching up and down that flipping hill in York.

    If anyone doesn't get the reference check https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=bFkkRySrZaI&list=RDAMVMbFkkRySrZaI

    As an individual I stood alone.
    As a member of a group I did things.
    As part of a community I helped to create change!

  • BrettWBrettW Member Posts: 607 Pioneering
    Sorry to hear you had a bit of a miserable fews days @Geoark but at least you managed to use your sense of humour to help you get through it. They do say laughter is the best medicine!
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,651 Listener
    I've been in a bad mood since last night (see my topic in the employment and careers section from yesterday) apparently that job offer I got by email yesterday morning is a scam company! I should known the offer of £400-450 a week for 2 hours work would be too good to be legit.

    I also spoke to the care manager of the company who does my morning care last night to cancel this morning's call due to circumstances changing, she said she'd tell the carer, guess what? the flippin' carer turned up this morning, that was bad enough but she was 20 minutes late! The call was down for 9 AM originally, and she rocked up at 20 past!

    Naturally I went bananas having just had a blazing row with me Dad about the scam company and other issues, such as the incompetent managers at the care company, but I knew it'd happen! I wouldn't mind but I'm supposed to be the one with the flippin' communication disorder, but at least I pass messages on when required to.


  • Cher_ScopeCher_Scope Posts: 3,404

    Scope community team

    @Geoark Ah dear, sorry to hear you've had a rough couple of days.  I hope your knee is on the mend soon and you've had plenty of rest.

    @MrAllen1976 I guess it's good you found out early about the job to avoid later disappointment.  Fingers crossed something better is around the corner for you.  Have you calmed down now about the carer miscommunication?  
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 1,651 Listener
    edited January 20
    @Geoark Ah dear, sorry to hear you've had a rough couple of days.  I hope your knee is on the mend soon and you've had plenty of rest.

    @MrAllen1976 I guess it's good you found out early about the job to avoid later disappointment.  Fingers crossed something better is around the corner for you.  Have you calmed down now about the carer miscommunication?  
    No because it's not the first time it's gone wrong in that part of my life and I can 100% guarantee it won't be the last due to incompetent managers who have the communication skills of a Sheep, and that's being kind.

    I also had a blazing row with my Dad this morning due to the scam from yesterday morning which I thought was a job offer.

    So as you can imagine I ain't had a very good week so far.

  • GeoarkGeoark Member, Scope Volunteer Posts: 1,373 Disability Gamechanger
    edited January 21
    BrettW said:
    Sorry to hear you had a bit of a miserable fews days @Geoark but at least you managed to use your sense of humour to help you get through it. They do say laughter is the best medicine!
    @BrettW Thanks for the message. I was told a long time ago I would always be in pain, it was just a matter of how much and how I coped with it.  I have always been good at laughing at myself, and during difficult times like this I do find it helps a great deal. Before all the pain I was involved in a traffic accident. All I can remember was a car clipping the handle bars and starting to go head first over them thinking 'oh sh' then I woke up in hospital. I quickly got bored, borrowed a pen from my wife and drew a face on my index finger, and then tied my shoelace around it. When the nurse came in I told her straight - 'Let me go or Mr Finger gets it!' Poor nurse looked utterly confused.

    I always think if I can find something to laugh at at least once a day then things cannot be as bad as they seem.

    As an individual I stood alone.
    As a member of a group I did things.
    As part of a community I helped to create change!

  • GeoarkGeoark Member, Scope Volunteer Posts: 1,373 Disability Gamechanger
    @Cher_Scope thanks. I will give it a couple of weeks and if things are not improving will ring 101, or what the NHS number is.

    Fortunately this time round I did not jar my back.

    As an individual I stood alone.
    As a member of a group I did things.
    As part of a community I helped to create change!

  • Marie88Marie88 Member Posts: 79 Connected
    edited January 21
    I’ve been feeling down this month and my sleep pattern is all over place. I struggle to sleep every night and I’m not getting up until about 11, then by the afternoon I’m always tired again and end up having a nap for a couple of hours. I probably should avoid going on my tablet too soon before bed but find it hard to break the habit.

    Anyone any advice on how to get my sleep pattern back to normal? It would be great if I got to sleep by midnight and up at 8am, I think it would help with my low mood to have a proper routine. I’m just finding it really difficult. I’m not working and the weather has been awful so I haven’t been out all week. When I do go out for a walk it’s usually in the evening when it’s getting dark as I want to avoid being in contact with people. I find that a lot of people still aren’t keeping their distance, so it puts me off going out in the day time.
  • Tori_ScopeTori_Scope Posts: 4,114

    Scope community team

    The NHS non-emergency number is 111 @Geoark. It's the non-emergency police number that's 101. I'm sure you would've checked before calling, but I just thought I'd clarify that for you :) 

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  • Tori_ScopeTori_Scope Posts: 4,114

    Scope community team

    I also find it really hard to keep a routine, and it can be especially difficult with everything that's going on @Marie88.

    Avoiding using your tech devices before bed is definitely a good idea. It is hard to break habits, so sometimes it can be easier to replace bad habits with healthier ones. For example, if you enjoy reading things on your tablet before bed, you could change to a book, or if you enjoy playing games on it, you could try a puzzle book instead. 

    Another tip is to try and minimise the amount of time you spend in bed not sleeping. This means not spending time during the day in bed if possible, and getting up as soon as you wake up. It also means trying to avoid spending hours in bed rolling around trying to get to sleep, which is what I often end up doing! To help with this, you could:
    1. Go to bed at the bedtime you've set (midnight)
    2. Try and get to sleep for 30 minutes
    3. If you're still awake, get out of bed and do something relaxing (away from screens!) for 10 miuntes
    4. Go back to bed and again try to sleep for 30 minutes
    5. Repeat until you get to sleep
    6. Wake up and get out of bed at the time you've set (8am), even if you haven't had much sleep
    This can help to train your body and mind to know that being in bed means it's time to sleep. 

    Another tip is to have a relaxing bedtime routine that starts around an hour before your bedtime. This could involve having a bath or shower, getting into your pyjamas, reading a book, or listening to music. Anything that'll help you unwind.

    Do you know what might be stopping you from sleeping?
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  • BrettWBrettW Member Posts: 607 Pioneering
    I've forgotten what it's like to have a good nights sleep. 

    I'm unfortunately subject to constant chest pain and when I lie down it makes it worse. Since the heart attack I can't lie on my left side at all for more than a minute before the really bad stabbing pains start. I also have to constantly shift position to help ease it and the medication I'm on means I'm up to the loo three or four times a night.

    I have Audible now from Amazon so at least I can listen to a decent book on my Echo or phone while I'm tossing and turning and have learned to live with a broken sleep pattern.


  • GeoarkGeoark Member, Scope Volunteer Posts: 1,373 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @Tori_Scope thanks for the reminder. Yes I usually check when I have to call the NHS number as I rarely use it and can never remember which way round it is.

    As an individual I stood alone.
    As a member of a group I did things.
    As part of a community I helped to create change!

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