Hi, my name is aimeealxo! Health Anxiety

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aimeealxo

Hello guys! I have suffered with health anxiety for a good few years now. I started working in a care home at 16 and was given a lot of responsibility and seen some very heavy stuff for such a young age. This is when my health anxiety started I am now 23. It's only recently got the worst it has been. It started with headaches which I went to my gp for a phoned nhs 24 this got put down to stress and possibly needing an eye test! So off I went to specsavers to get my eyes tested as it was long over due, after the exam they advised me I had a slight swollen optic nerve and that they would have to refer me to the hospital with in 2 days. I was crying in the opticians scared out of my mind and the 2 days I had to wait for the hospital we're almost unbearable. I couldn't eat, I didn't want to shower ( gross ), I couldn't focus on anything else apart from googling the symptoms and diagnosing myself with a brain tumor. I eventually went to the hospital and they gave me the all clear, the optician in the hospital actually said I have better vision than him!!! Since then I've not been able to shake the thought of having a brain tumor. I started experiencing pressure in the back of my head which had me on the phone to nhs 24 numerous times and seen at the out of hours department where the nurse briefly checked my eyes again and done some nerve testing which she said was textbook and nothing to worry about, didn't stop me!!! Now I feel like I am experiencing floaters in my vision and pain in my eye balls which AGAIN I have phoned nhs 24 for as it has been a nightmare trying to get another opticians appointment. I went to A and E and the nurse said there was not a lot she could do and I really needed to see an optician but I shouldn't be concerned because my blood pressure etc were all absolutely normal. Now I can't stop thinking about my vision being blurry but only long distance and on the tv and seeing floaters in my eyes. I'm constantly looking for them and checking my eyes by covering one eye and moving my eye ball back and forth to see if I can see better when my eye ball is a certain way. Thankfully I have an appointment for the opticians tomorrow but another stress is if I will be able to make it to the appointment due to loosing my job from anxiety and having no money. My partner is working a new job until 5pm and the appointment is at 2pm so I think it's adding extra stress trying to find transport or money for a taxi. We have recently moved 2 hours away to a new city and I still don't know my way about and there are no bus stops near. Overall my health anxiety is killing me, my partner thinks I have something new wrong everyday and it's causing tension between us because we're also trying to care for his mum who has Parkinson's. I feel like I'm constantly going out of my mind and over analysing every sensation in my body but right now it's my eyes I'm panicking about

Cher_Alumni

Hi @aimeealxo and a warm welcome to our community.  I'm so glad you found us 

I'm sorry to hear you've recently begun experiencing health anxiety and I know from personal experience how easy it is to become highly attuned to changes in the body and panic.  I recently heard a good saying and that was instead of focusing on 'what if' to look at 'what is'.  And taking this viewpoint, all the evidence points to you being healthy - the hospital said you had excellent vision and your blood pressure came back within the normal range.  I get though how the 'facts' can become obscured by fear and that's why I think it would be a good idea for you to speak to your GP about how you're feeling - are they aware of what's going on?  If not, perhaps give them a call to speak through your anxiety and explore what treatment options are available.

Alongside this, you can self-refer to your local Improving Access to Psychological Therapies (IAPT) team who would be able to assess you and see if any therapies i.e. CBT, counselling would be beneficial.  Visit this NHS website to refer yourself and read more

There's some online resources that you can use to help manage thoughts around health anxiety.  These are:

• NHS Health anxiety webpage - scroll down for self help tips including keeping a diary/distraction techniques
• Get self help for health anxiety webpage - which discusses what drives health anxiety and mindfulness
• MIND's self care for anxiety webpage - which has a comprehensive list of tips on how to cope

You also mentioned that you've recently lost your job and don't have any money.  I'm sorry to hear this and wondered how you were getting on?  Have you visited an online benefits calculator to see what your eligible for?  

Just to advise - I've removed the duplicate thread you posted so we can keep all answers in this one space.  I hope the above has helped but please keep talking to us so we can support you through this difficult time - remember, look at what is and be kind to yourself    It won't be this way forever.