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Afraid of change even though it’s beneficial to me.
I suffer from PTSD, Agoraphobia, Depression and Anxiety which are attributed to formally being in a very violent and controlling relationship.
I was helped to leave said relationship by police and my local authority who assisted me in obtaining social housing (which I am extremely thankful for). However, soon after taking up residency in the property, it soon became prevalent that the area I was housed in was beset with issues such as anti social behaviour, drug dealing, domestic violence etc. During my tenure in the property there have been many major incidents such as a rape, a stabbing, aggravated robbery, altercations between drug gangs where a machete was produced, amongst many other incidents. I have also personally been subjected to homophobic and disablist abuse and even physically assaulted. Recently my home was caught up between an altercation between two gangs where my home was damaged, windows broken etc. These incidents have had a tremendous effect on my mental health and had worsened certain aspects of my illnesses.
I have now been offered to be rehoused away from the area. However I am really apprehensive of doing so. This is mainly owing to the fact I have made the interior of my home a kind of sanctuary, where even when the worse is going on outside, I feel safe and secure. I am also of the adage that it is ‘better the devil you know’ and am concerned that I could end up going from bad to worse. I will also struggle to afford the cost incurred with moving (and have been told no financial help will be given as the move is my own choice) and would not be able to afford to make any new home as safe and secure as I have made my present home.
I guess it’s mostly the fear of the unknown so any advice or if anyone has been in a similar situation, It would be great to hear your experiences.
Thanks in advance.