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Stressful time at home with my 8 year old

LollieK
LollieK Member Posts: 3 Listener
edited December 2021 in Education
Hi, I'm Lorraine and main carer for my 8yr old grandson who has an EHCP outlining SEMH difficulties and,  as of yet undiagnosed ADHD and autism. He was transferred to a specialist SEMH school in 2019 after the mainstream school he attended couldn't cope. We were stuck at home for 3 months whilst a new school established with little support of communication. Several years and heartaches later we find ourselves in the  same situation! We had an emergency review for grandson in July and eventually secured a place at a new therapy school that sounded perfect. He started on 8th November and after 3 hours I had to collect him as he had reacted violently and when I  got to the school he was running riot in the reception area. I had to restrain him and take him home in a cab. The school have refused to have him back but the Borough are still trying to negotiate a reduced hours reintegration back. I'm not sure it is the best place for him but we have been stuck at home again fir 4 weeks with little school contact once again. 
I worry the longer he is home, the harder it will be to get him back in successfully again.
Also, I have to take more time off work    as a  TA and may lose my job which I cannot afford! I also have a 22 yr old son with MH difficulties who wont leave the house and so its impossible to get him the help he needs?
Has anyone been through anything remotely similar? I feel so stressed and overwhelmed with it all as my grandson is also very challenging at home!
He has been under CAMHS for the last year and a half too!
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Comments

  • janer1967
    janer1967 Member Posts: 13,344 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi and welcome to the community 

    You certainly have a challenge on your hands it appears with the education sector 

    I'm not in a position to give any useful advice but just wanted to make you feel welcome 

    I hope others can help 

    There is a programme on here to help carers or parents I think it is called navigate if you look in parents section I'd not one of the admin will point you in right direction 
  • LollieK
    LollieK Member Posts: 3 Listener
    Thank you, it is very isolating being at home so your response and advice is appreciated 
  • L_Volunteer
    L_Volunteer Community Volunteer Adviser, Community Co-Production Group Posts: 914 Pioneering
    Hi @LollieK

    The first thing I want to say is I am sorry to hear you and your grandson are experiencing this. It sounds really tough for you both. I know you were looking for personal experiences so I am hoping someone can respond to you if they have experienced something similar previously. 

    However, in the meantime, I can confirm that one of my main areas of knowledge is SEND education. The first thing to do would be to contact your local authority to ensure your grandson's EHCP is updated with the most appropriate school (and supports within the school) for meeting his needs. You might also benefit from exploring IPSEA's supports as they have a high level of expertise in relation to SEND education. If you are interested, you can find more information at https://www.ipsea.org.uk/. They also have a section dedicated to EHCP's more specifically at https://www.ipsea.org.uk/pages/category/education-health-and-care-plans. I hope these resources help!

    In terms of your son with mental health difficulties who is unable to access appropriate support, your first point of call would be his GP. However, Mind (https://www.mind.org.uk/) is also a great resource. 

    If you have any more questions or if there is anything, in particular, we can do to support you, please don't hesitate to let us know  :)
    Community Volunteer Adviser with professional knowledge of education, special educational needs and disabilities, and assistive technology. Pronouns: She/her.
  • chiarieds
    chiarieds Community Co-Production Group Posts: 11,632 Disability Gamechanger
    edited December 2021
    Hi @LollieK - & welcome to the community from me too. I'm sorry for the difficulties you're facing, & can see why you're unsure about your grandson's school, particularly when you have had little further contact from them.
    You can find further info about Scope's 'Family Services' in the following link, both 'Navigate' that Jane mentions above, & 'Parents Connect,' which is online at the moment. I'm sure you'd find these services most helpful: https://www.scope.org.uk/family-services/    Hoping this may help. :)

  • L_Volunteer
    L_Volunteer Community Volunteer Adviser, Community Co-Production Group Posts: 914 Pioneering
    Thanks @chiarieds for providing @LollieK with further support. As always, your efforts have been acknowledged and they are appreciated. @LollieK, if you wish to, please feel free to keep us updated with your progress. We will be more than happy to support you along your journey. As you can see, we are a friendly and supportive community  :)
    Community Volunteer Adviser with professional knowledge of education, special educational needs and disabilities, and assistive technology. Pronouns: She/her.

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