Bad Clubbing Experience :(

islahowe2002

Hey! I do have CP but I am also 20
and a student so I love a good night out aha. However when I went out with my friends on a Friday night it’s near enough ruined the fun for me. 

My CP predominantly affects my legs, so when I do walk my main issues are balance and stamina while standing. Like many of us, I walk differently then others (sometimes call myself happy feet lol) but this has never been an issue when it comes to nightlife. I will admit, I had a drink or two as it was my best friends birthday and I have also recently finished uni so I was in the mood to celebrate, I also got out of a below knee cast 2 weeks prior due to calf lengthening surgery so I’m still getting used to the splint. However, when me and my friends walked to the smoking area for some fresh air a bouncer followed us, pointed at me and told me I had to leave due to my walking. I calmly and kindly explained that I have CP and this is often how I walk, I was a little tipsy but I could easily navigate bannisters, friends arm for extra support as that’s what I usually use if I am walking unaided as it’s become second nature to plan the safest way to get from A to B. They then processed to say “I am not concerned about your posture, I can see you can’t even walk up the stairs without a bannister so you’re too drunk to be here.” Firstly, CP affects many people on many different ways and often more then just posture. Also, is it now a massive red flag if I use a bannister?? I thought I was being sensible (for once) rather then being cocky and falling. Another bouncer then joins so they are backing me up against a wall while my friends are watching. At this point I felt like being dragged out would lose my dignity so I explained to the point I was ready to get up hospitals letter on my phone to prove them that I genuinely cannot help it 😂😂 awful I know but ya girl payed £5 entry so she’s staying aha. They eventually walked away however I had a bouncer near me at all times as if they thought I was breaking the law or doing something wrong when I was simply dancing awfully and being with my friends. At the end I gave in, stopped drinking, sat down outside and then eventually left early to then be snarled at for using the elevator rather then the stairs to leave. 

Has anyone else had this happen? I’m going to email the venue about this and I wish I got the staff members names. I know it’s not really ideal for people with CP to do activities such as clubbing but it makes me feel like everyone else around me and I forget about my worries for a few hours. Also, can anybody think of better comebacks as I just panicked and nearly have them my whole medical history 😂?

Have an amazing day brilliant people! X

Tori_Scope

A warm welcome to the community from me too @islahowe2002 I'm also really sorry to hear that you experienced this! It seems as though the bouncers were at best disrespectful. Some people can be really ignorant, unfortunately! I agree that making a complaint might be a good idea. I imagine the venue will be able to check who was on shift at the time you were there, and I'd hope they'd take this seriously. Everyone should be welcome to dance terribly with their mates! 

As for comebacks, I'm not sure... I'll have a think I'll also tag @Richard_Scope in here, in case he can offer you any additional insight or tips. 

Congratulations on finishing university Do you know what you might like to do next? 

islahowe2002

Tori_Scope said:

A warm welcome to the community from me too @islahowe2002 I'm also really sorry to hear that you experienced this! It seems as though the bouncers were at best disrespectful. Some people can be really ignorant, unfortunately! I agree that making a complaint might be a good idea. I imagine the venue will be able to check who was on shift at the time you were there, and I'd hope they'd take this seriously. Everyone should be welcome to dance terribly with their mates! 

As for comebacks, I'm not sure... I'll have a think I'll also tag @Richard_Scope in here, in case he can offer you any additional insight or tips. 

Congratulations on finishing university Do you know what you might like to do next? 

Hi! Thank you so much I’ve only completed first year however my goal is to go into SEND teaching ☺️

Tori_Scope

Ahh right, well done on getting through your first year then @islahowe2002! That's a great goal  

Alex_Alumni

Hi @islahowe2002 welcome to the community and thanks for sharing what's happened, I'm sorry you had such a horrible experience that night, but hopefully there's been a lot of better nights out to make up for it

Something similar happened to me while at university and out clubbing with friends, although it was more than a few years ago now. 

I have CP which affects my legs too, so I often look a bit wobbly when walking. There's an infamous street in my university town, the place to go for all the clubs and bars, it's largely pedestrianised at night, but very cobbled. I happened to be walking towards a club and fell over on my way to the door. 

At the entrance the bouncer told me I couldn't come in as I was too drunk to stand or walk properly. I was a bit tipsy, so naturally found this hilarious, and explained I had CP. My friends tried to explain this as well, but the bouncer wasn't having it. In the end we moved on to somewhere else, with my friends yelling "well you've just lost our custom!"

Conversely, on a different night out, I was once a bit too drunk, and was carried by a friend into a club with absolutely no objection at all! 

I can't think of any good comeback's either I'm afraid! Even though laughing about the irony of the situation probably didn't help me with getting into the club, it helped me and my friends feel better about what had happened. I can tell you've got a good group of friends around you too, and it's positive to hear they are there when you need it. 

Perhaps this is something you could raise with the students union as an issue to discuss, especially if you have a disabled students network? Although it's not a good thing, I'm willing to bet you're not the only student to experience this when out clubbing.

Do keep us updated with how you get on in contacting the club in question, and definitely raise your concerns if you can. As others have said, we should all be able to go out clubbing without facing barriers, whether physical or attitudinal

Richard_Scope

Hi @islahowe2002
I have experienced this too. I was accused by bar staff of being drunk (sometimes my speech isn't the clearest it could be) I have also been refused entry to venues due to my wheelchair being a fire hazard!!

All can do is vote with our money and complain to venues whose staff really need ED training. It certainly has never deterred me and I don't think it will deter you either. Keep us updated.

wendy41

Hi @ islahowe2002
I would write a letter (hard copy) and then do the 'same' in an email. The way you were treated is unacceptable. You are entitled to enjoy a night out without bouncers intimidation. You shouldn't have to produce letters etc; the fact you told them 'politely' about CP their ignorance SHOWED THEM UP! However, what is fact is if you fall (just like everyone else on their premises) they are held responsible and can be sued. 
Where was your friends 'support' when this was happening? As friends don't stand by and watch while bouncers intimidate a friend. Friends support each other!? I understand as I've had clashes with bouncers in the past (including being thrown down a flight of concrete stairs). 
In your letter I would suggest you pin point the date it happened, the intimidation, the fact you pointed out to them you have a disability and how they ruined the night out. Also state what you would like to happen ie:(written apoligy, bouncer education training on disability) also you would like a reply to your email/letter. That the proprietor/manager is responsible for his staffing and how making 'assumptions is dangerous' and you are entitled just like anyone else to enjoy a night out with friends. Stick to facts. GOOD LUCK!