Hi, please tell me there is hope — Scope | Disability forum
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Hi, please tell me there is hope

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T0rtur3d
T0rtur3d Community member Posts: 2 Listener
edited June 2022 in Dating, sex, and relationships
I got diagnosed with cptsd a couple of months ago, something I've suspected for over a year now.
Ive not coped well with this illness since it first started, but tonight has been the biggest hit so far. My bf, who I love dearly has told me my illness has ruined us, and I'm beyond broken, he's just compounded that I'm unworthy of his love and that I'm not someone who is easy to love. I don't know what to do, I can't stop my heart aching. 
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Comments

  • Sandy_123
    Sandy_123 Scope Member Posts: 50,073 Disability Gamechanger
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    Hi @T0rtur3d I'm sorry to read about your relationship problems. Maybe if you both have some space for a little while he may feel differently. 
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  • T0rtur3d
    T0rtur3d Community member Posts: 2 Listener
    edited June 2022
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    Thank you both for your comments, I've always known its been a problem, as much as I know it's too little too late, we've been together 7 months, I've started looking into help. He's asked me many times before but I didn't feel right using his money to do so (it's something I've had held against me many times in the past) and I don't earn enough myself to do it privately. But I'm now taking the rights steps. He told me he no longer loves me, then told me he did, so basically saying it to hurt me, but that just compounded how unworthy I feel. I'm tired of fighting this now
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  • Sandy_123
    Sandy_123 Scope Member Posts: 50,073 Disability Gamechanger
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    Take time out for yourself and have a good reflection on it all. If you want to remain In the relationship, then there are things to work through for you both. If he's saying things to hurt you, then you deserve to be treated better by him, only you can make the changes that you need.
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  • Alex_Alumni
    Alex_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,562 Disability Gamechanger
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    Hello there @T0rtur3d and welcome to the community, thanks for reaching out and explaining what's been happening. 

    Your diagnosis is a pretty big change, can you tell me what support you're getting for managing your CPTSD, from your GP for example?

    You've mentioned that you're looking into help and taking the right steps, and that's positive to hear, what do you find is helping at the moment?

    It's a little concerning to read what your boyfriend has told you, you should never be made to feel unworthy, or that your CPTSD is a problem that can't be worked through with support. Have you spoken to someone you trust, friends or family about how he's making you feel?

    I'll be checking in with you a little later on today, so keep an eye out for an email from community@scope.org.uk, and please let us know if we can help with anything in the meantime.

    Alex
    Online Community Coordinator
    Scope

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  • ksenia89bf
    ksenia89bf Community member Posts: 26 Connected
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    A very good evening to you. 

    Have a strong network of loved ones. 

    You could ask your doctor for a support group, somewhere you can share your experience with people in similar situation as yourself. 

    It can't be nice for you what your boyfriend says. 

    Never feel you are unworthy young lady. 

    Marcus. 
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  • henryaham897
    henryaham897 Community member Posts: 1 Listener
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    Just go on a date, woman are easy to fall and easy to move on haha kidding :D
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  • Phil0110
    Phil0110 Community member Posts: 12 Listener
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    Very sympathize with your situation  :( I suppose it's the wrong person for you. The real love endures even such adversity
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  • L_Volunteer
    L_Volunteer Community Volunteer Adviser, Scope Member Posts: 7,978 Disability Gamechanger
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    How are we all doing today? 
    Community Volunteer Adviser with professional knowledge of education, special educational needs and disabilities and EHCP's. Pronouns: She/her. 

    Please note: if I use the online community outside of its hours of administration, I am doing so in a personal capacity only.
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  • Richard_Scope
    Richard_Scope Posts: 3,648 Scope online community team
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    There is hope and you must try not to lose sight of that, even though it's extremely difficult to envisage. The fact that you are reaching out and have the bravery to be so open and honest is huge! I find that these self-care tips from MIND are really useful, as is talking. We are here for you.
    Scope
    Specialist Information Officer and Cerebral Palsy Programme Lead

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  • iain57
    iain57 Community member Posts: 17 Connected
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    Hi sorry to hear  you are still the same person  an you can do better in your self end of day its ur bf losse
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  • cjg30
    cjg30 Community member Posts: 5 Listener
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    hi i was diagnosed with cptsd last year. I had never realy heared of it i had heared of ptsd but i had some syptoms on the list but not all, it was only during therpy i became aware of it. I ticked all the boxes. I do feel there is still not enough understanding of cptsd. It can have a big impact on life and relationships. I think its great more ppl are speaking about it now.  It is reashring i found to no its not all in my head and its a real condition that needs to be taken seriouly. Hope you manage to move forward well and get good help on your journey forward. 
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  • thara9643
    thara9643 Posts: 69 Connected
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    Try a therapist 
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  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,492 Disability Gamechanger
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    How have you been doing @T0rtur3d? I hope that the above comments have helped!

    Thank you for sharing that with us @cjg30 :) I'm glad that recognising that it's a real condition, and that it's not your fault, has helped.

    Is that something you've found helpful in relation to dating and relationships @thara9643?
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