Do profiles mean anything while online dating?

Splatmate24
Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 411 Contributor
I learned lessons the hard way because one guy's profile said he was single, but I did find out that he already had a girlfriend, and he tried to set up a date for me after I found out he had a girlfriend through SnapChat. The date didn't happen, and I blocked him after that from Snapchat. That is one big flag. Now that's how cheating could happen. I am texting a new guy and have said I would like to get to know him first. I saw his profile and didn't see "single" on it, but that's not how to find out if he's really single and not lying about it. I didn't know the first guy matched with me had a girlfriend; if I knew if he had a girlfriend, I would just block him and move on to someone else. Are there any good ways to tell if a guy is single or not? What else should I be on the lookout for when looking for only single guys who could have a relationship?

Comments

  • Leo_Aces
    Leo_Aces Community Volunteer Adviser, Scope Member Posts: 104 Contributor
    Hi @Splatmate24, it can be tough online for anybody taking part in online dating to work out whether people they are chatting with are genuine and being their true selves. As I’m sure you know we can all choose what we share online, whether that is on social media platforms or online dating.

    Some tips I tend to follow are:

    Be cautious if people are moving quickly, if somebody asks for your number after only a short period of chatting on the dating site.

    Pay attention to when somebody wants to talk to you. For example are they mainly busy in the evenings or at the weekends. Obviously it’s not always a clue but it could indicate they have somebody else in their lives 

    Similar to the first tip, if somebody starts by being very intense with their communication and promises they make to you, then go cold or distance, this could also be a sign of there being another person on the scene,

    Hope these help ♠️
  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 411 Contributor
    @Leo_Aces. that what I go by and seen other people with Simlers issue. I am not interest in Talls guys. not interst in guys that have high confident and is not good kind of confident. i would prefer a shy guy instead. I also have checked online about learning disability group from Liverpool. has a few more option .  i also saw the one people called the fake nice guys acts that with one guy and did blocked .
  • L_Volunteer
    L_Volunteer Community Volunteer Adviser, Scope Member Posts: 7,925 Championing
    It sounds positive that you are aware of what you are and aren't interested in @Splatmate24. Hopefully, that narrows it down.

    You mention you have checked online about learning disability group from Liverpool. How has this gone for you?

    We are here for you and listening to you if you would like to share more with us. It sounds positive that it has a few more options  :)
  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 411 Contributor
    @L_Volunteer that has be more the one learning disability  group.  I also have checked one of uni website from Liverpool uni is  LJMU  and di has special course for people with a learning disability and did graph with lines of people with a did show more people with learning disability
  • L_Volunteer
    L_Volunteer Community Volunteer Adviser, Scope Member Posts: 7,925 Championing
    That sounds really helpful @Splatmate24. Thanks for sharing your additional insight with us.

    How do you feel about all of this? We are here for you and listening to you if you would like to share more with us  :)
  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 411 Contributor
    @Danielle_2022  I understand but i some red flags can be easy to sport and other red flags are not easy to sport . the other two guys were too busy .
  • Cartini
    Cartini Community member Posts: 1,107 Trailblazing
    @Danielle_2022  I understand but i some red flags can be easy to sport and other red flags are not easy to sport . the other two guys were too busy .
    Hi,
    I`ve been following this conversation...... I can`t advise you on affairs of the heart, but I can say that you appear to be fixated on "red flags".  The problem with fixation is red flags can appear to be there when actually there aren`t any at all which means you might not meet the man who is waiting to meet you.

  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 411 Contributor
    @Cartini .  what else there type o flags . so far most of my previous relationship all did has red flags in and also don't be another toxic relationship or guys that are cheaters . 
  • Cartini
    Cartini Community member Posts: 1,107 Trailblazing
    @Cartini .  what else there type o flags . so far most of my previous relationship all did has red flags in and also don't be another toxic relationship or guys that are cheaters . 
    I should have said "don`t look for flags", not just red ones.  You will miss "the one" if you keep looking for something that may not be there.

  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 411 Contributor
    @Cartini why do you kept not looking for red flags . going to get into another toxic relationship if didn't looks for reds. I don't understand anything about what you saying .said same thing twice
  • Alex_Alumni
    Alex_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,538 Championing
    I don't want to assume, but perhaps what Cartini means @Splatmate24 is to try dating without expectations.

    It can be hard to let go of ideas about 'green flags' and 'red flags', but sometimes when you first meet someone it's just about getting to know them. 

    If you're getting on well, you can always talk about what you like or don't like later on. Does that make sense?
  • Cartini
    Cartini Community member Posts: 1,107 Trailblazing
    I don't want to assume, but perhaps what Cartini means @Splatmate24 is to try dating without expectations.

    It can be hard to let go of ideas about 'green flags' and 'red flags', but sometimes when you first meet someone it's just about getting to know them. 

    If you're getting on well, you can always talk about what you like or don't like later on. Does that make sense?
    Thank you Alex, that`s exactly what I was trying to say.

  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 411 Contributor
    @Alex_Scope I don't have many unrealistic expectations left  anyway and also kinda try one but seem to ended the same .  I'm on very low and nothing seem to be chaining much about my dating experience so far . has be same as last year . can get match on mainstream dating apps just fine . i get uncomfortable online dating for disabled . I also has looked on you tube and dating is getting more out hand . i can understand some things but I can't understand somethings .


  • Alex_Alumni
    Alex_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,538 Championing
    Thanks for explaining @Splatmate24 :)

    When I was online dating I found it helpful to take a bit of a break. If you're finding things frustrating, there's nothing wrong with stopping for a while. 
  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 411 Contributor
    @Alex_Scope is not the  mainstream online dating that issue is more about learning disability dating agency that i seem to sing up for even i sent off the application form both form on post and one from email and still hasn't gotten anything back or reply . that only part that making frustrated and annoyed .


  • L_Volunteer
    L_Volunteer Community Volunteer Adviser, Scope Member Posts: 7,925 Championing
    It sounds like you are having a particularly difficult time at the moment with the learning disability agency @Splatmate24. In particular, with not getting anything back or responses. 

    I can hear how this makes you feel frustrated and annoyed. Other than getting things back and responses, is there anything else that might help at the moment? 

    I, unfortunately, don't have the magic power to make sure you get things back and responses soon. However, I do care about you and I am here listening to you :)
  • Splatmate24
    Splatmate24 Community member Posts: 411 Contributor
    @L_Volunteer . My mum is one that did phone calls with some learning disability . one them called match & match only do events in Manchester but membership are already sold out and try other 3 but still no reply by email sent twice . that only reason that being using mainstream dating apps . also has be friend zone more and rejected on hiki that also be delete from my phone .

  • L_Volunteer
    L_Volunteer Community Volunteer Adviser, Scope Member Posts: 7,925 Championing
    That sounds frustrating @Splatmate24 - limited locations and already sold out. In addition, you have no replies despite keeping trying and have been friend zoned/rejected.

    You are showing so much grit and persistence - well done you. I know you would much rather hear though and I hope things work out better for you soon  :)