You cannot change the path of destiny
All this time ive been fighting so hard for support and reading back over my own posts and notes I realise that this has been going on for 15 months.Its now obvious to me that there is obviously a greater power going on that simply defines my future path.So I am no longer going to do anything about anything as this it seems is how it's supposed to be
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I know exactly what you mean. My earliest memory of things feeling like this was when I were 5 years old, I'm now 50, it's like the Universe or reality is always against me, like I'm cursed. Anything that I really want to happen, that's very important to me and will be great for my well being and will make me happy, it's like I always get blocked from it, like whatever it takes to stop it from happening will happen, no matter how unlikely, like it's orchestrated.
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I think we live in a busy world now where we dont individually mean anything to anyone.Unless you have a strong family unit or friends that you can count on then you have nothing ( im speaking only for myself and how I see it).Every medical professional is mindful of their position and how it is reflected when there has been failures ( for eg).But in the scheme of things it really means nothing as we mean nothing and when you realise the inevitability of it all it makes you realise just what a waste of time so many years have been.
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Same mines since age of 3 im 54 funny enough talking about this to psychiatrist you know I been reading lot of Karl jung oh what he says I can so relate too and I been following monks peace walk and he's says to say Today is my peaceful day no one can ruin my peace but me he says to say on a daily basic first thing In the morning and im really trying to just live in the moment im always ten steps ahead worrying this is not our fault we are forced to live in a world that our souls don't connect too well for me that is i take it Day by Day we can't control everything it's impossible we can drive ourselves insane my brain runs at lightening speed but I've allowed myself to get up late without calling myself names and feeling bad for breathing good way to look at things jane and hey they could work out good we all deserve peace i suppose only we can build that for ourselves and be realistic of what we can and can't do
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'and he's says to say Today is my peaceful day no one can ruin my peace but me' @Catherine21
Interesting piont, Catherine! But isn't this a bit much of responsibility to put upon one's shoulders? At least I am finding it really hard to treat myself exactly like this, not to ruin my own peace… of course I am far from being a monk.
I quite like this for a starting point of self-compassion, yet… aren't we all being pushed into thinking certain things by our surroundings, society? Shaping our thoughts and feelings? I am not saying there is nothing we can do, but being this kind to ourselves as the monk in your example, wow, I envy him. Am I making sense?
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I suppose for me it makes sense because I bombard myself 24/7 I wake up instantly state of panic obsessing worrying playing situations in my head i never ever relax never so I have been following them and I have been saying this you know we was never meant to live like this none of us live freely as nature intended I question everything now from what they spray in sky's to chemicals on our food why would they want to do this to us disconnect us from ourselves separate us these are my views only so water holds memory if you talk kindly to plants and water them everyday they thrive now don't get me wrong I spent days in bed terrified like a child for me it's not so much pressure maybe it's hope but I do live day to day you know being kind to yourself could be making a cup of tea and some toast im 54 and it's really strange as I don't feel one that age or like I've had a life it's all a blur it's like I've sat here for 15 years in my dark room waiting for bad things to happen I've been talking to a psychiatrist and she said I think we can work on this and I got so scared because this is all I know sorry I do go off topic when I say it im saying it to myself because my mind takes me to another level
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You're saying it ever so nice, @Catherine21 - about us all being one. Not a lot of people truly understand or even see that. Somehow we often end up talking about what separates us from one another, whether it is people, plants, animals… Indeed, we were never meant to live like this, apart from the outside world with all its fresh air and lovely birds sounds, but also us being disabled or chronics being categorized as different… sigh. I am so glad we can at least talk about this. Btw, have you heard of the book Forest Euphoria? Might be something for you. 🌿
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Yeah we're not meant to live the way society makes us live today, the current world is set against us, for perminent failure. Its the reason why mental health and depression is so high. The food we eat is full of artificial things mainly to keep consumers coming back for more and is profit based. The water we drink isn't natural (full of flouride) or perservatives, too much flouride is known to cause lower IQ and brain function and shrinks the pineal gland in the brain. Yet we still put flouride in our toothpastes and water supply.
Life is too much full of money and greed, life instead should be about sharing resources, having natural food and drink that doesn't harm anyone. Have adequete housing for everyone and the ability to enjoy life without the constant worry about money.
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No i will look that up thankyou im starting to think adhd and autism could of been my superpower if I channelled it from a young age it's been inbeded so deep even as a child I used to question everything and got laughed at or told to be quiet find it still happens to this day it's so hard because im starting to understand my brain has been hardwired for red alert I have jaw condition and my shoulders top of my back always tense stomach issues I can read people like a book I used to think I was psychic but it all stems from childhood its blowing my mind tbh all this shame and guilt has been eating me alive the psychotical warfare feed to us especially in these times with the news Internet bombarding us deliberately to keep us down its actually very cruel I dont bother with people much but I am starting to see we do need each other we need to stick togeater in these times thats why I genuinely and so appreciate of everyone on here we fought so many personal battles togeather we joined togeatger about welfare reforms information and support this is what the embellishment despise like I said I take one day at a time yesterday's gone tomorrow is not guaranteed sorry to waffle on be kind to yourself today let's give ourselves a break we deserve peace
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