9 years together he wants to split

sezsixx
sezsixx Community Member Posts: 8 Contributor

Hi,

I'm 53 my partner is 35. We've been together 9 years. We spoke about the age gap and the possibility of having children when we knew we were heading into a serious relationship.

2 years ago bought a house together. We were previously living mortgage free in my late husband's home.

I have cerebral palsy spastic diaplegia and 2 weeks ago diagnosed with FND. He told me he feels like my carer, not my partner. The age gap is now an issue for him and he wants children. We spoke about adoption, but he says the issues are bigger than this.

I'm so mixed up and scared to get alone with my health issues, plus I don't work, I couldn't now afford the mortgage on our home.

We have a dog together to.

Sorry that I'm spilling all my thoughts at once!

I just wondered if you could help me find a way through all this? In practical and emotional ways please?

Comments

  • SoapySoutar
    SoapySoutar Community Member Posts: 506 Empowering

    I'm afraid there is little you can do if the other half wants out. That was my experience anyway.

    Is your partner willing to attend couple counselling sessions? I couldn't persuade my then wife to do that, but maybe you will have better luck.

  • Holly_Scope
    Holly_Scope Posts: 5,270 Online Community Team

    Hi @sezsixx. I'm really sorry things are so difficult and uncertain right now. It sounds like you've had some deep discussions with your partner about the future, and like SoupySoutar mentioned, having some counselling together or even just for yourself to help through this.

    Do you receive any current support with your health issues at the moment? You could look at a care needs assessment to see what support you'd be entitled to here - Getting a care needs assessment - Social care and support guide - NHS which might help to ease some pressure.