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Making conversation

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Leggy
Leggy Community member Posts: 18 Listener
in Mental health and wellbeing
I’m registered disabled, plus have depression anxiety, anyone out there wonders why people don’t know what to talk to you about, before my problems, people loved a chat, now cross the road to avoid me,People I’ve known years ignore me, I’m still me,It was worse when I was in a wheelchair, I’m not invisible,I’ve been let down, still feel better for expressing My feelings.
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  • Neil2017
    Neil2017 Community member Posts: 155 Courageous
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    Hi @Leggy
    yes can agree with you that you can lose contact with friends, etc because they don’t want to know you because of your disability, illness or condition. There’s still so much stigma or ignorance against all of these.

    maybe as well as posting on here it is possible to find befriending services or support & social groups in your area if you can get out and about?

    I like listening to a lot of music myself especially when the weather is cold. What do you do to pass the time if not doing or supervising housework?
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  • Topkitten
    Topkitten Community member Posts: 1,285 Pioneering
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    I think it is probably a combination of things. Being disabled takes away all the usual platitudes from conversation. They can't  really ask you how you are because you might tell the truth and they don't really want to know, it's just conversation and not a genuine request. I think they are embarrassed that you are ill and they are not. Another factor is that you now live in a different world to them and they aren't really sure what to talk about or may be worried about saying something stupid. For example a recent post about sex and the disabled showed that a number of disabled people had been asked.... "Oh, is it possible for disabled people to have sex?". Then ofc there is the possibility they might get roped into helping you regularly. Whilst they won't mind opening or holding doors open occasionally. they certainly wouldn't want to be doing so regularly.

    TK
    "I'm on the wrong side of heaven and the righteous side of hell" - from Wrong side of heaven by Five Finger Death Punch.
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  • Leggy
    Leggy Community member Posts: 18 Listener
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    Thanks for reply, but I’m still confused,If I was a animal with a broken bone and it was limping a lot of people would be so keen to offer to help or just interested, maybe because a animal can’t reply? Confused, but I carry in, a Oder member of the public pushed by me yesterday to get to till at the supermarket and others just looked away or one said just breath it’s nearly Christmas.??? 
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  • Neil2017
    Neil2017 Community member Posts: 155 Courageous
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    Also agree with what @Topkitten has said above. People are in there own little bubble and don’t seem to want to get involved to much unless it is fun. I’m not religious but it’s lije the story of the good samaritan. How many people will pass by until one fives help or support? Also in my opinion people seem to be more and more superficial. Like neighbours will post Xmas cards through your door yet won’t make the effort to speak to You day to day.


    with animals people see the cuteness factor. They see a cuddly furry animal that czn’t helpitself. Yet with people perhaps they expect abuse, or it is just plain ignorance to the disability.
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