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Help for my son with CP
leeCal
Member Posts: 2,999 Disability Gamechanger
Hi, my son lives independently and does a part time job with difficulty as he uses crutches to get about. Recently he has experienced various problems with life in general but refuses to see a doctor about them. He lives in one room in a house share but there’s rarely any company for him. He doesn’t cook either so relies on take always or an occasional,meal for one cooked in his microwave. And of course the lockdown has been pretty awful for him and he has experienced depression and some degree of hypochondria. Are there any services at all which may or may not require a doctors referral as he is quite distrustful of them to be honest. I feel he needs a social worker or support worker of some kind.
Thank you in advance.
Thank you in advance.
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Replies
He should be able to help and offer some advice
Also, he might benefit from a needs assessment which can offer a range of support. Please let us know how you get on.
Scope
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he is very resistant to help and quite bitter about services available as he feels let down by everybody and has done for some years. He’s thirty two and wants what everyone else has, full time job, own house and a family. These are his perceptions anyway of course not everyone has these things. I’ve tried to get him to have counselling because I don’t think he’s ever come to terms with his disability but he won’t see anyone. Very difficult.
It also is a self-refer service and would put him in touch with a social worker who will manage his case.
I'll tag our CP officer @Richard_Scope to see if he has any further suggestions.
Scope
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It can be incredibly difficult when you have been let down or feel you have been let down by the medical services. Chloe has given some really good points of contact. It would be useful to break down his difficulties one by one, so they can be addressed. Does your son have access to the internet? If he would like to talk to me, I would be more than willing to see what areas we could improve. There is no quick fix and the desire to change things has to come from your son. This is what we can work on.
Specialist Information Officer - Cerebral Palsy
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I will continue to monitor the situation closely because he has spoken about taking an extreme measure and of course we’ve all been very worried about him. If I can I’ll get him to come online and speak to you. Thank you for offering to help.
Specialist Information Officer - Cerebral Palsy
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and would it need to be requested by me or by my son for my son?
It wouldn't be a social care referral made by Scope. You or your son can contact your local Adult Social Care Team through your local authority and then an assessment will be carried out.
Specialist Information Officer - Cerebral Palsy
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You'll need to have this assessment before the council can recommend a service such as:
The needs assessment is free and anyone can ask for one.
Scope
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How are thing going? How is your son doing?
Specialist Information Officer - Cerebral Palsy
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I was just wondering if there were any National clubs that he might join which are specifically for people with cp. I’m not saying he will join them, in fact he probably won’t but I feel I must try to do something to take his mind off himself. He has become self obsessed especially with regard to his health.
Many thanks.
I'm sorry to read that things have not improved for your son and it mist be worrying for you too. Has he always been obsessive about his health or do you think that the current times we are living in have magnified these feelings? At your son's age, a group I can recommend is https://www.outsiders.org.uk/outsidersclub/club/the-outsiders-club/ I have heard lots of positives about this group in terms of meeting new people and building self-confidence.
You mentioned in your first post, that your son has a mistrust of doctors and would rather seek therapy without a referral. If this is still the case then the therapy would have to be paid for by your son or you. I have found a therapist in Colchester http://www.cbt-colchester.co.uk/ that you might want to consider. Failing that, I would be more than happy to talk with your son, on the community or over email. Perhaps he would benefit talking to another man with CP and similar life experiences?
Specialist Information Officer - Cerebral Palsy
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i have suggested the outsiders club but he’s not interested.
he would also not engage with yourself or anyone else at the moment so we’re a bit stuck.
But thank you anyway. Well just have to muddle along.
Specialist Information Officer - Cerebral Palsy
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very kind thanks, I’ll try to get him to come online. 🙂