Finding friends in Glasgow area — Scope | Disability forum
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Finding friends in Glasgow area

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weeyin
weeyin Community member Posts: 30 Courageous
Hi

Due to the lockdown I have been feeling lonelier recently.  I am not a fan of social media and I am no longer on Facebook.

I have 2 best friends since childhood.  They are both healthy and have their own families. I have never felt comfortable talking about my health and how it impacts my day to day life with them. I have always had a good friendship with them and before corona virus would meet at least once per month for lunch, dinner or a couple of drinks.  

I would really like to find friendship with someone I could confide in and relate to.  That I could have a more open and honest friendship about pain, how it affects relationships with partners or that we can relate to each others struggles.

I have a partner.  He is lovely but again I can’t open up about my health fully.  Although we would never cheat on each other due to the way the system works marriage wouldn’t be an option.  We generally see each other twice per week.  We don’t live together but have been with each other over 1.5 years.  I also check in on my elderly parents often.  My dad has Alzheimer’s and I feel inadequate alot of the time as my mobility is poor and I am in pain daily.

I live just outside Glasgow.  I like to watch tv dramas on Netflix, read, study modules through the Open Uni.  I enjoy a couple of drinks now and again and listening to music.

Really looking for female friendship for a chat now and again.  

Linsey

Comments

  • Cher_Alumni
    Cher_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 5,741 Disability Gamechanger
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    Hi @weeyin and thanks for posting.

    I can really appreciate you feeling lonely.  These are such challenging times and I think more of us are feeling the brunt of lockdown this time round.  It sounds like you are doing well considering your impairment, so please try not to feel inadequate - you are doing your very best.  I'm sure your parents realise that.

    From personal experience, I've made friends in my 30's in various ways.  Mostly from going back to learning at college, university and summer schools - which I know isn't easy with the ongoing pandemic and most things being online!  But also, from virtual communities such as this one - be it running support groups or even Facebook groups dedicated to the brand of leggings I like  :D I see that you aren't a fan of social media though, so this might not be your cup of tea.

    In 'normal' times, you could explore meeting like-minded people via websites such as Meetup.  I'd really urge you to keep safe if you did this though, telling people where you were going and when you were due back.

    Just thinking out loud, but does your Open University course have any online hangouts where you can talk to other people doing the same modules?  That could be a starting place.  Or, you always have us!  We are a friendly bunch and many of us adore Netflix too  :D

    Let me know what you think and I hope you are having a nice afternoon.
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  • weeyin
    weeyin Community member Posts: 30 Courageous
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    Hi Cher

    thanks for taking the time to reply ?

    My mum does realise I am thinking about how I can help them on a daily basis.  We haven’t always had a great relationship but I know she appreciates how much I want to help and support them.  I was always a daddy’s girl.  Alzheimers has changed my dad a lot which in a way has probably brought me closer to my mum.

    Im not on this site regularly but I am really please I found out about it.  I struggle with my mental health and have probably not kept contact with people that I should have.

    Yes the Open Uni is great but when I joined in with Whatsapp groups my phone continually pinged with constant messages as so many people were on the chat.

    I think you have convinced me to perhaps re join Facebook.  I might just use it for particular support groups.  I think my previous Facebook just got out of hand as I accepted friend requests from neighbours and people from my town that I wasn’t actually comfortable having on my Facebook.

    Thanks again for the message Cher it has been helpful.
  • Cher_Alumni
    Cher_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 5,741 Disability Gamechanger
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    Hi @weeyin

    I'm really glad my post helped a little.  Alzheimer's is such a cruel disease, especially for the families of loved ones, so it's good to know one silver lining has been the strengthening of your relationship with your mum.

    It would be absolutely lovely to see more of you on our community.  We are a supportive bunch and discuss so many varied topics, there's normally something for everyone.  And, if you don't see anything you relate to, please feel free to start your own discussion.  

    Agh, I hear you about those busy WhatsApp groups.  They do get annoying when the convo ramps up and the pinging starts!  The idea of re-joining Facebook and being more selective in terms of what content you see, and friends you approve is a good one.  Don't feel like you have to accept everyone as a friend on there, it's okay to be a bit ruthless - that's something I've learnt too after wondering why I saw my milkman's nephews Tenerife holiday pics  :D

    I hope today's going well for you. Take care and talk soon.
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  • weeyin
    weeyin Community member Posts: 30 Courageous
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    ???????? thats Facebook ?

    Thank you Cher.  My partner is staying tonight and we are getting a takeaway so I’m really looking forward to quality time and maybe a funny find ?

    thanks again
  • weeyin
    weeyin Community member Posts: 30 Courageous
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