I'm a disabled grandad and look after my granddaughter. I'm worried about the future — Scope | Disability forum
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I'm a disabled grandad and look after my granddaughter. I'm worried about the future

Cindy1086
Cindy1086 Community member Posts: 2 Listener
edited April 2021 in Children, parents, and families
I’m a disabled grandad who has looked after my granddaughter since she was 5yr old she is now 15yrs old but I am worried about my granddaughters future how she will be able to cope if anything happens to me , I’m. 73 
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  • janer1967
    janer1967 Community member Posts: 21,964 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi and welcome 

    I am sure this must be a worry for you 

    I don't know what yo suggest other than do all you can to prepare her and try make her more independent 

    Ars there any other family members who you can discuss this with and the possibility of them looking out for her 
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  • Sandy_123
    Sandy_123 Scope Member Posts: 49,713 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @Cindy1086 hi and welcome to the forum,  well done for raising your granddaughter . 
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  • Ross_Alumni
    Ross_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,652 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @Cindy1086

    Welcome to the community, glad you've joined.

    As above huge well done for raising your granddaughter, you've done a fantastic job. I understand why this would be a worry, as sad as it can be to think about that moment, it's always best to plan for it. But I imagine with the grounding you have put in place for her she will be okay.
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  • Caz_Alumni
    Caz_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 621 Pioneering
    Hi @Cindy1086

    Just wanted to stop by, say hello, and add my welcome to the community :)

    I must say that your care and concern for your granddaughter speaks volumes about how you have probably brought her up to be. A big well done for that!

    Maybe this is something that you could have a conversation with her about as well? That might help you both to start putting plans in place so that she can continue to develop her own independence as she gets older and then you can support her with that as well.

    How does that sound?
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  • Cindy1086
    Cindy1086 Community member Posts: 2 Listener
    edited April 2021
    Hi caz my name Peter and my granddaughter is Selena I’m not sure where to start because  I have been through so much in my life as Selena has in short life we have helped each other she’s a great girl and all I won’t is knowing I can find the right people to advise and help guide her ,she says don’t worry I’ll be o/k ,but I know it’s going to be a lot harder than she thinks I haven’t money to leave her due to past problems,I suffer with a range of problems mentally (schizophrenia)vertigo arthritis tinnitus, but we have coped all that has happened can’t be put into a few paragraphs. Plus Selena has been going through a few problems of her own worrying how she looks and worries about friendships at school so we got in touch parental advisers at school ( they no our history)and have been there for support but not sure they can help with this worry she goes to [removed by moderator - name of school] by the way I am not very good with technology or using my I pad bye Peter.
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  • Tori_Scope
    Tori_Scope Scope Posts: 12,491 Disability Gamechanger
    edited April 2021
    She sounds wonderful @Cindy1086 :) It's great that you're able to support each other. 

    I'm glad to hear that you got in touch with the school to get your granddaughter some additional support. 

    As Janer1967 suggested, it could be worth speaking to other family members, if you have any, about the possibility of them looking after her should anything happen to you. Are there any family members you could speak to? 

    Does she have any good friends who she could temporarily stay with were anything to happen? 

    Just to make you aware: I removed the name of Selena's school from your comment to protect her privacy, as well as yours. 

    P.S. you're doing just fine with posting on the community, so don't worry about that :) It's great that you're able to access the community using your iPad. 
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  • Caz_Alumni
    Caz_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 621 Pioneering
    Thank you for telling us a bit more about yourself and your granddaughter @Cindy1086. 

    It's so nice to hear that you're both there for one other and that you've each been able to support the other in your own way. In fact, from what you say it sounds like she is just as concerned about you as you are about her - and that's the nature of family I suppose, isn't it? We can't help but worry about our loved ones, no matter what. 

    Tori_Scope has raised some really good points that you might want to consider, as well. Do you think that you and your granddaughter could maybe work on putting some of these, or indeed other, practical measures in place? That might help to relieve some of your concerns, maybe?

    Anyway, I hope that some of those suggestions are helpful and please do come back to us again if you would like to chat with about this a bit more :)
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