Everything happens for a reason — Scope | Disability forum
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Everything happens for a reason

Daniel_2021
Daniel_2021 Community member Posts: 79 Courageous
Hi,
I just wondered what people's opinions are regarding the above statement.
For me I hate it. If everything happened for a reason why would loved ones die in pain, people have awful health conditions and such sad things happen in the world - what is the "reason" behind it. I find it an over simplistic almost uncaring statement at times.
This is only my opinion, some people may have the complete opposite view or experience. It'd be great to hear and respect as many views as possible, who knows I may even change my view.
Thanks,
Daniel 

Comments

  • Cress
    Cress Community member Posts: 1,012 Pioneering
    I've always thought of this as a kind of comfort blanket for those who have a belief in a higher power as it were.

    Myself I have no such belief and think poop happens. 

  • L_Volunteer
    L_Volunteer Community Volunteer Adviser, Scope Member Posts: 7,979 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @Daniel_2021

    Thanks for your post. I can see that you have already received some great responses from @Username_removed and @Cress. What a thought-provoking post! I am someone who generally tends to agree with the statement that everything happens for a reason. I use it to celebrate the good, accept rejections and keep looking beyond the here and now when times are tough. However, I am also very much of the view that sometimes bad things do happen to good people and there is no reason for it. I hope this helps  :)
    Community Volunteer Adviser with professional knowledge of education, special educational needs and disabilities and EHCP's. Pronouns: She/her. 

    Please note: if I use the online community outside of its hours of administration, I am doing so in a personal capacity only.
  • leeCal
    leeCal Community member Posts: 7,550 Disability Gamechanger
    edited October 2021
    Everything does happen for a reason, that is cause and effect, very simple. 

    What some people interpret that statement to mean however is that everything happens for some divine reason, ie deemed by God, or the gods depending on your religious belief. I won £5.40 the other day on the lottery, the cause was that I bought a ticket, why didn’t I win big? Wrong numbers. 

    Some of my my family members have died over the years, the reason ...illnesses. Cause and effect. Again, I have a son born with cerebral palsy and someone had the cheek to tell him it was due to his bad behaviour in a past life! Can you believe that! No! It was caused by a lack of oxygen during birth which in turn was cause by, on this occasion, bad nursing! 

    I actually do believe in God and am religious to some extent but I don’t believe God micro manages every minute of my day, nor do I blame Him for the deaths of my family members, they were ill and prayers didn’t stop them from dying. My views are complex and a little confused I’ll admit but it seems to me that simple cause and effect is in charge in this world and relying on anything else is a folly.

    “This is my simple religion. No need for temples. No need for complicated philosophy. Your own mind, your own heart is the temple. Your philosophy is simple kindness.” 
    ― Dalai Lama XIV

  • leeCal
    leeCal Community member Posts: 7,550 Disability Gamechanger
    Further cause and effect from Vatican news.

    India: more than 400 priests and nuns have died of Covid-19

    https://www.vaticannews.va/en/church/news/2021-05/india-church-priests-nuns-deaths-covid19.html

    “This is my simple religion. No need for temples. No need for complicated philosophy. Your own mind, your own heart is the temple. Your philosophy is simple kindness.” 
    ― Dalai Lama XIV

  • Cress
    Cress Community member Posts: 1,012 Pioneering


    Some of my my family members have died over the years, the reason ...illnesses. Cause and effect. Again, I have a son born with cerebral palsy and someone had the cheek to tell him it was due to his bad behaviour in a past life! Can you believe that! No! It was caused by a lack of oxygen during birth which in turn was cause by, on this occasion, bad nursing! 


    Like the despicable Glen Hoddle….
  • Daniel_2021
    Daniel_2021 Community member Posts: 79 Courageous
    Hi @leeCal,
    Your response was really interesting, amazingly logical and very measured given the health issues your son has sadly faced. I guess you could have potentially been a person who takes exception to that comment however you've applied some rational to the situation. I'll be honest I don't always have that ability hence my dislike of the phrase. You have, however given me a complete new angle to look at it with.
    In terms of people saying that people deserve things for a previous life it's insensitive in the extreme and down right offensive. 
    Thanks,
    Daniel 
  • Daniel_2021
    Daniel_2021 Community member Posts: 79 Courageous
    Hi @L_Volunteer,
    A really kind member of the site sent me a message recommending a site that has courses on, one of which being a beginners course in creating a journal and self reflection.
    The site had a spiritual element to it and was around self improvement, as I was reading it that phrase popped into my head hence starting the discussion. There has been some really interesting responses. We all go through different things so have so many ways of viewing the same thing differently.
    Thanks,
    Daniel 
  • nannymaroon
    nannymaroon Community member Posts: 560 Pioneering
    "everything happens for a reason."
    I think that statement is very dismissive esp when someone is trying to understand a situation they are in . It's like saying don't question anything or anyone's motives and behaviour. It makes me feel very disempowered when someone says that.
    How are we to learn about anything if we think things just happen beyond our influence or control?
    It's easier to be nice🙂

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