Husband Being Treated Or Not Treated The Correct Way

francesanna

In May last year when we were on Holiday my Husband's behaviour was erratic and quite frankly weird. We were in Greece and I knew he hadn't settled into the holiday as it usually takes him a few days to wind down from work, however this was different, he drank a fair bit of Cider which was totally unlike him as he usually drinks Beer and only 3 or 4 over the course of  a 2 week holiday, but this particular night he drank 6 Ciders on the bounce, anyhow to cut a long story short we went to bed that night and during the early hours he got up and went outside and was adamant that someone was trying to break into our room, we were on the 3rd floor and he insisted they were climbing up to the balcony, I just told him to go back to sleep thinking he had drank too much, then later on he got out of bed put his shoes on and went back to bed with his shoes still on, then a while later he got up and put his boxers on back to front and then went back to bed, than later he got up again and went to the wardrobe took off a hanger a pair of trousers, refolded them put them back and went back to bed. The following day he was incoherent and confused and I was really quite frightened, I called my mum and she contacted our surgery telling them there was an issue and we were due back a couple of days later and could we have an appointment as a matter of urgency to which we were told NO, we had to ring on the morning we wanted the appointment at 8am. My husband was signed off work for 3 months with Extreme Stress & Anxiety, he went back to work earlier than the G.P. wanted saying he felt better, he has since lost a lot of his short term memory, can't remember names of people and places and he even forgot the names of all our cats, where there food was in the house, how much too feed them among a lot of other things which was a part of his everyday life etc. etc...this went on for a few months and also he was hallucinating, and constantly asking me the same questions over and over again.
We went back to our G.P. and he asked him a few questions which he couldn't completely answer so was referred to The Mental Health team as a possible case of 'Early Onset Dementia' he has so far had 3 cancelled appointments, our surgery has on 1 occasion sent the blood tests required to the wrong place, they then redid the tests and then was told they were more than 3 months old by the time he got his referral so they had to be done again which he did then his appointment was cancelled again because the person who did the tests had left. My husband went to work one morning in March and then came back home because he just couldn't function and has now since retired due to ill health and he has not changed even though at first they said it was extreme stress and anxiety, he has had no follow ups, no medication, no help of any kind from our surgery and I am fuming and am thinking of making a formal complaint but am frightened it causes his treatment to be even more delayed.

Hannah_Alumni

Hello @francesanna

I am so sorry to hear your partner is going through such a tough time. And that, you are hitting the wall with the doctors and referrals. Has your GP practice got multiple doctors under the surgery? Could seeing another to try and push forward, help at all? 

I'd also encourage you to reach out to Dementia UK. They have some great advice pages on their website, but I think their advisors would be able to best support you and your partner. 

MW123

Hello Francesanna

I was sorry to read the difficulties you are facing with your husband's health and the unhelpfulness of your GP surgery. It is important to address this issue, and I suggest contacting the practice to request the direct email address of the surgery manager. In situations like these, it is often beneficial to bring the problem to the attention of the manager as a first step. 

Given that your husband was initially diagnosed with stress and anxiety, which has now possibly progressed to "early onset dementia," it is crucial to consider all possibilities and eliminate any other potential causes for his behaviour. While writing the email to the manager, I don't mean to alarm you, but I recommend requesting that your husband's GP urgently refers him for a brain scan to rule out any other underlying factors. 

Francesanna do not feel frightened to voice your concerns by making a complaint. Composing a polite and well-written email expressing your disappointment and concerns regarding the delays should be welcomed. It is likely that the GP surgery is unaware of the impact this lack of support is having on you and your husband. A well-managed GP practice should be receptive to your complaint and make every effort to reassure you during this challenging time.