Not feeling too good

66Mustang

I know people can't really help over the internet but I just wanted to share to see if it makes me feel a little bit better

We had some things happen in the family overnight and I am quite anxious and am not feeling great at the moment

I was already feeling nervous enough about having a family dinner tonight but this has made it worse

I don't feel I can tell my parents as they have enough to worry about with another family member and also my Mum adores Christmas and I don't want to spoil it for her

Sandy_123

Oh no hopefully it will turn out OK 

66Mustang

Thank you a lot both @sandy123 and @Beaver79

I have just heard that my "grumpy" relative is in an all right mood today so that should hopefully make things a little easier

I am looking forward to the food  

Jimm_Alumni

Hey @66Mustang, I hope everything is okay. I know things can get very stressful this time of year, but it's almost over! I hope grumpy isn't too bad as is predicted and you have a lovely meal.

66Mustang

Thanks @Jimm_Scope

66Mustang

Thank you @Ada

Sorry for not sharing exactly what happened but want to keep it to myself at the moment, I don't actually mind sharing as I trust people here, but just in case the family member is reading the forum I wouldn't want them to see I have shared.

66Mustang

Thanks @woodbine and @Ada

66Mustang

I’m at the relative’s house now

They seem OK

chiarieds

Hoping all goes well & you can enjoy your meal

66Mustang

Thanks @chiarieds

Been here 45 mins now and going OK

I am having a beer

Sorry for my poor wordsmithing I am on my phone and can’t stand typing on this, prefer a proper keyboard  

chiarieds

Definitely prefer a keyboard too; I'm rubbish using a phone You need some cheese to nibble on with that beer!

66Mustang

We have a big gammon to plough through first

Lou67

@66Mustang
Glad to hear things are going good just now. Enjoy the food and beer and it won’t be too long till your back in the comfort and safety off your own home. ❤️

66Mustang

Thanks all for the support, I thought I replied but realised I was getting this thread mixed with the Christmas Anxiety thread. I hope you are all having a really nice day today.

66Mustang

I am struggling but just did a good thing that I am really proud of.

I am usually diplomatic with my relative but she was in an especially bad mood today so I said in front of her "I am just going to take 30 mins in my room until people have calmed down"

It was hard to have the courage to say that but I think it's sewing the seeds to get her to understand that her temper affects me

66Mustang

@ada

She doesn't do it for no reason, she is elderly and is in a lot of pain. I can sympathise and understand the reasons she is upset. She is young at heart, absolutely hates being old.

But I don't think she should be grumpy with us, the pain is not our fault after all.

Thanks for the kind message and hope you are having an OK day

Autism_at_40

66Mustang said:

I am struggling but just did a good thing that I am really proud of.

I am usually diplomatic with my relative but she was in an especially bad mood today so I said in front of her "I am just going to take 30 mins in my room until people have calmed down"

It was hard to have the courage to say that but I think it's sewing the seeds to get her to understand that her temper affects me

Wow, that is really good 
I've struggled in the past to tell people that I need the time away.  It's definitely a good thing.

Lou67

@66Mustang
Oh I’m so proud off you, you have come so far, it’s great you were able to speak up, and hopefully your relative will have a think to themselves how their mood has affected you and your other family members. ❤️

  

chiarieds

As someone who is likely older than some of you, but is also in pain, as many of us are, that's no reason to make another's life anything from uncomfortable to downright difficult, especially when it's another family member. 

I'm still 27 in my head (so young at heart!), & look back at the opportunities & experiences I have enjoyed when younger, & now go with the flow of time & that I still have opportunities to find the most simple of pleasures, especially with my family.

Your grumpy relative is in danger of alienating the very people that are there for them, so good you gave them a wake up call. Some people are a glass half full sort of person, others not; sometimes difficult to change their mindset, but you have tried, which will help all of your family, including them, if they take this onboard. Good for you.

66Mustang

Thanks all for the comments and support, it really does mean a lot and helps me a lot.

@chiarieds I share that very same opinion, but it is helpful to actually hear it from someone who is in pain, because it's easy for me to say "I wouldn't behave like that" having never been in constant pain myself.

I am going to post a message I posted on another thread as I think it is relevant for here as well.

--

Sorry I didn't post yesterday evening, I was really tired after all the activity and went to bed at 7.30pm.

My relative who we call "Grumpy" had a real turn last night. She was all right during the day except for the usual moaning and complaining, but at dinner she randomly got up and swore and said I'm going to bed. We didn't see her until the morning when she has just apologised for her behaviour and said she had an awful headache but is feeling a lot better today so let's see how today goes.

-- 

Hope everyone has a great Boxing Day!!!  

Grinchy

well done that you managed to get away for a bit, sorry you had to go through that, i hope your ok now