Relationship — Scope | Disability forum
If we become concerned about you or anyone else while using one of our services, we will act in line with our safeguarding policy and procedures. This may involve sharing this information with relevant authorities to ensure we comply with our policies and legal obligations.

Find out how to let us know if you're concerned about another member's safety.
Please read our updated community house rules and community guidelines.


antiquecollector Community member Posts: 39 Courageous
Hi folks if your partner got let down for a day out by a friend of hers and you offered to step in and come along instead and offered to get a train down to theres instead of them travelling up to your house to pick you up and later in the day you asked them if they still wanted to go and they said its 160 mile round trip to pick you up.

How would you take this?

Shes a very switched on highly intelligent albiet fiesty lady.

So i am rather baffled.

Im feeling a bit anxcious about it this and not sure what to do

So reaching out for support from hopefully fellow aspies on here or anyone else that has experienced a simliar issue in a relationship.

Many thanx everyone


  • 66Mustang
    66Mustang Community member Posts: 13,668 Disability Gamechanger
    I don’t think I understand the question

    You said you offered to get the train so why does your partner even need to bring up the fact that it’s a 160 mile drive?

    Did you miss a bit out maybe in your question, did you change your mind and ask her to drive?

    For what my opinion is worth I’d happily get a train and I’d happily drive 160 miles to meet my partner if I had one :D 

    I think if you like someone enough both of those things are insignificant and should not be an obstacle to meeting up, with the exception of barriers created by disability or health issues and stuff, of course
  • antiquecollector
    antiquecollector Community member Posts: 39 Courageous
    Hi and good morning,i offerred to get the train down to hers as she was upset about her mate letting her down on there day out (so that we could still go out) then she later yesterday she kept saying it would cost far too much to come up and collect me.

    I really dont know why she said this?

    She never forgets anytingl.......

    Is there and logic on what she has said at all??.

    Thanx for commentating
  • Biblioklept
    Biblioklept Community member Posts: 4,682 Disability Gamechanger
    Maybe she's worried about putting you out? So although you offered she thinks it's too much to put on you, for you to get and pay for the train down. It could be her hoping you'll confirm you'll be getting the train both ways, or it could be because she doesn't feel comfortable with you making that sacrifice for her. 

    Ask her, I'm sure she'll explain! <3 
    Something like: "You don't need to drive though, I'm happy to get the train down and the train home again afterwards. Let me know if you'd still like me to"
  • antiquecollector
    antiquecollector Community member Posts: 39 Courageous
    Thanx say she said to earlier todayi never even said i would get train down.....


Complete our feedback form and tell us how we can make the community better.