My home is my prison

Scrapper
Scrapper Community member Posts: 7 Listener

Hi,

I'm after advice. Anything will help. I've read all sorts of stuff and contacted the council etc but it seems there's no help at all. I just can't think anymore. It's exhausting.

I have mobility problems and my home has 9 steps up, then a path, then another 4 steps and then a corner and another 2 steps. I can just about manage to get up and down but by then my spoons are used. I've been sitting indoors for years watching the world go by outside (I'm grateful I have a view). Also it's a bungalow so inside is OK.

So we ordered a mobility scooter that comes apart which is amazing but my husband is struggling getting the pieces up and down the steps. He can't get it in and out despite pretending he can so I don't worry. He's had a couple of heart attacks so I'm worried about the pressure on him. I'm a huge burden. I hate that. I'd love to get some independence back and take the pressure off him.

The council say my husband earns too much for them to help with adaptations and we have been unable to sell our house without going into negative equity. I dont know how we'd manage to afford a suitable home that way. It's a huge risk.

I just want to go outside occasionally. We have a son with special needs and I feel I've let him down being a wet blanket who is anchored inside all the time.

We don't have the money for excavating a slope and our outgoings are already maxed out. I really don't know how we're over the threshold for everything all the time because we have one wage coming in and a child to support. We pay for an online school because his needs mean he can't go to regular school and then there's the mortgage and bills. It leaves us with very little left.

Sorry this is long but does anyone have any suggestions? Is there something I'm missing? I'd be very grateful for any ideas. Thank you.

Comments

  • Albus_Scope
    Albus_Scope Posts: 6,814 Online Community Coordinator

    Hi @Scrapper and welcome to the community from me. 😊

    I'm so sorry to hear you're having a hard time getting out and about, I know how important getting a change of scenery can be for people. But please don't feel like a wet blanket, it's a tough time for you and I'm sure he doesn't feel let down at all.

    Do you have a shed you could store the mobility scooter in over night? It'd save on your hubby lugging it up the stairs at least.

    Another query I had was are you claiming any benefits currently? I was just wondering if there was something you were eligible for but had missed out on? I find this benefit calculator super helpful.

    Sorry for all the questions. 😆

  • Scrapper
    Scrapper Community member Posts: 7 Listener

    Thank you for your reply. The steps are from the street and there's no access to the back without going up these steps. We're not entitled to any benefits. Apart from non means tested like pip.

    We can't get help with anything because we're over the threshold. I contacted the council and asked if they could do an assessment even just to tell me what's possible with alterations and they refused due to my husband's income.

    The NHS caused my disability after a botched operation so I didn't know this would be a problem when we bought the house. Can't go on the housing list because we own a property. It seems like a brick wall. I just feel trapped

  • StodgySquare
    StodgySquare Community member Posts: 14 Connected

    Really sorry about your situation. ❤

  • Albus_Scope
    Albus_Scope Posts: 6,814 Online Community Coordinator

    Hey @Scrapper thanks for the added details, that does sound rough, I'm so sorry. Have you considered writing to your local MP? They can often be a big help in situations like this.

  • Cantilip
    Cantilip Community member Posts: 612 Empowering

    You've probably thought of this but I don't suppose you could do something clever with ramps? Since you own your home you could simply leave them in place.

    The Ramp People: Redefining Ramp Solutions for Every Challenge - The Ramp People

  • egister
    egister Posts: 245 Empowering

    How much will it cost to adapt your home and your site so that you can go outside without interference? Have a project?

  • Scrapper
    Scrapper Community member Posts: 7 Listener

    Thank you for the suggestion, I will look into this. It's worth a try

  • Scrapper
    Scrapper Community member Posts: 7 Listener

    Hi, we've had a couple of people come around and quote. They say that the only way for there to be enough space is to knock down part of our lean to and redo the entrance and that would give enough room to excavate a slope. They say this will cost around 15k. Which is why I was hoping the council would send an occupational therapist or somebody who knows if there's a cheaper way. Our mortgage won't let us add to our loan. We can possible raise 5k towards it but it seems such a lot to find. I'm looking into whether it would qualify for vat exemption. Its very difficult to fathom out the rules but that would even bring the price down a bit.

    It gets me down sometimes but I think there must be an easier way

  • Scrapper
    Scrapper Community member Posts: 7 Listener

    Sorry, I've only just seen your reply. Thank you for taking the time to respond. It's tricky because we live on a street where the houses on our side are higher than the street. There's a wall at street level and our front is up higher than the street. There's a flight of 9 steps through this area.We can't put a ramp on the street to take us up level to our front door level and a ramp on the steps would be very steep. I'm not sure how it could be done but maybe a ramp company could work something out. Thank you.

  • LIVEDANDLEARNED
    LIVEDANDLEARNED Community member Posts: 84 Empowering

    This is so heartbreaking, you deserve to live life, not just exist. Here is a link which helps you find out who your local mp is so you can write to them. I’d explain it exactly how you have to us, which was very eloquent. If you want to send me a direct message on here, I also have another posibility of getting some help out to you. You matter x

    https://members.parliament.uk/members/commons

  • LIVEDANDLEARNED
    LIVEDANDLEARNED Community member Posts: 84 Empowering

    https://members.parliament.uk/members/commons

  • egister
    egister Posts: 245 Empowering

    Have you considered installing an electric winch in addition to the ramp on steep steps?