Not coping

Catherine21

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1088334#Comment_1088334

Yes you hit nail on head they asked me would I be able safety to unpack wverything as ive kept inside for 50 years I said yes im 54 menopause bpd bdd the works I need professional help

Jane315STARX

Oh my God I can't actually believe this and thank god I didn't recieve this message yesterday.I have just got a message to say They have sent me back for a telephone appointment in March of next year with that same Dr who prescribed me olanzapine

Strawberry1

I may not have been the best support here @Jane315STARX but i am sending a ton of empathy and compassion your way .

My heart goes out to you .

Sending a ton of peace , harmony and love too .

Hoping for the light at the end of the tunnel to get there quickly for you .

I apologise i havent been the best helper with this .

Sorry but i do wish you all the best

Jane315STARX

@Catherine21 so it seems we are being treated in a simular way.We are left with access to nothing.Yesterday my mind was extremely unstable and I called every resource available.I made a very immature choice surrounding my son which was because of the JCQ taking away his access arrangements.Which could have had an impact on the rest of his life by my taking him out of school,not completing any G.c.s.es etc etc.But this was only because I was literally going out of my mind.Im not blaming the therapist.But I think maybe I should have thought properly before going that I might not be able to cope after and what do I in-between.How do people cope and function?.I'm trying not to think about it because I have my son to look after.But I feel like crying and losing control.Its a very strange and difficult place and scary to be in.My only real option if it goes to the levels if yesterday is to go to A and E.But my son would be utterly broken and would not come back from it.I know his character and personality.Im sorry i know im rambling,im just trying to keep sane

OverlyAnxious

Your situation is a bit different to mine but I was told on 3 separate occasions that I wasn't ready for therapy. And I do agree with them, as it took me such a huge amount of effort just to get to the first assessment each time.

The reason for this is that I was struggling to physically travel to the place, and manage basic tasks like eating & drinking and using the bathroom where I live. Meaning I couldn't cope with the additional stress of therapy on top. In my case, I need minimum of a more suitable property before I would have the opportunity to cope with therapy. But there's just no help in accessing a more suitable property without having specific physical conditions. Honestly I don't see any realistic way of ever being ready for therapy now.

Jane315STARX

He is in school and I ended up speaking to them and they said they were going to appeal it.Im not sure if they were just saying that to pacify me.But they said I could tell my son he has his extra time so

Catherine21

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1088375#Comment_1088375

No ive been there bringing child up with severe mental health and its so so hard so you are doing amazing some mums would have done so long ago when we're fearful overwelmed we do make rash choices but you reached out of here and thats good becasue we understand sometimes things seem so impossible we cant breath but we get through as we love our kids so much dont be hard on yourself day by day thats all we can do one step at a time yes but the thing I do differently is I let cmht know exactly how I feel I said stop gaslighting me I went mad making out I had confident and anxiety issues be kind to yourself today your doing all you can so what more. An you do

Jane315STARX

People always have a tendency to jump in and think my son is need or will be affected as a consequence of how I am.zwhich I am all to aware of and which is why im trying to get help to get rid of these past issues.I think for the most part I speak/write quite rationally and hopefully that comes across.Even yesterday in the depths of losing my mind I knew my sons safety was a priority and that was what was on my mind and giving me such hightened anxiety.

Jane315STARX

Thankfully he is completely oblivious to what is going on ( I know this sounds unbelievable).But I have managed to contain yesterday episode away from him

Catherine21

https://forum.scope.org.uk/discussion/comment/1088386#Comment_1088386

NNo I get that completely my daughters 31 now my one fear is she would say I was crazy or I didnt care enough and she didnt and doesn't because like you I did everything possible to shield her the person we punish the most is ourselves you are one person doing everything some people would crumble yes we get to burnout who wouldnt but we are so strong so strong its that feeling of being judged good did I hate that I thought everyone thougt I was a bad mum and know I look back they didnt it was how I judged myself for not being perfect and resolving everything its impossible you love your son with your whole heart I can see that on here you only want the best for him wish I had parents like that I think your amazing as I know how hard it is keep telling them what support you want and need and dont let anyone gaslight you this is your life your reality no one knows that better than you sorry if I seem to be talking for you I just relate so much xx

Jane315STARX

@OverlyAnxious I think its ok if you agree with them and perhaps there might be a time when you will feel.ready.But now that I've verbalised the things I've not spoken about for over 15 years its incredibly terrifying almost impossible to bear.I know that sounds very over dramatic especially as im writing it down.but im trying to distance myself from my own words to get it across.