What do you do when you're about to have a massive meltdown?
Personally I swear a lot, and tell whoever's winding me up to F off, and go on a long sweary rant about everything that's currently and ever gone wrong with my 50 years of living on this Earth.
How about you lot?
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I swear a lot under my mask and it does help that I can't hear myself with earplugs in and headphones on. Also on the bus if somebody sits next to me yelling into their phone, I'll start muttering back.
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My first aid is water. I carry it everywhere and it calms me down in most situations.
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What type of meltdown? There are so many I have to choose from! I can relate to the one you're talking about, and it's typically when I'm overwhelmed by too many problems and/or when no one is listening to me no matter how well I REPEATEDLY explain myself. So everything builds up and I'm like an exploding volcano. Swear words are the lava!
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Oh don't get me started, I repeatedly have to do the "I am speaking English in a Sheffield accent" speech when people don't understand me, SO annoying!
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@WhatThe how does water help? 8 don't get it
@SheffieldMan1976, one of my favourite movies ever was set in Sheffield....
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I'm not sure anything can stop me having a major meltdown which is why they are so disturbing! Mercifully rarer than they once were.
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Mine are brutal too. I've worked through a ton of stuff over my lifetime, and learned a lot of coping methods, and have learned what and who to avoid whenever possible. I used to be nearly constantly in meltdown mode. I still am a lot, but they aren't as severe or as frequent. But I've had virtually no life. That's been the trade-off.
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@WhatThe how does water help?
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StarryEyed, it is a trade-off and I've accepted a quieter life, too.
Water calms me down immediately. This is a late habit of mine but I discovered its magic when my daughter was quite young and it calmed her down. She was allowed her bottle in class at primary school.
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I usually go for the tactical retreat into the garage to swear at a car engine that hasn't run since the Bush administration. There is something about screaming at a rusted bolt that really puts the last 50 years into perspective without getting me arrested. It is either that or a long drive where the radio is loud enough to drown out my own thoughts. Check out some of the local hobby groups if you need a place to disappear for a few hours.
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The Full Monty was a classic, have you seen the "sequel" TV series that's been on Disney Plus? And ITVX more recently?
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I like to rant which gets louder as I go on and my Yorkshire accent gets thicker ๐ There are usually tears but it feels good to let it all out.
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That's usually what causes my rage in the first place, certain people not understanding my thick accent, over the last few years since I became middle aged, I've developed a kind of "old school" Yorkshire accent, and a slight Manchester/Liverpool accent (well after 40 odd years of watching Brookside and Corrie lol)
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Oh I wish I could get a sample video of all you guys letting loose! Love these confessions. Or maybe at least an audio? LOL!
Here we go with a little more of my storyโฆ
! [EDIT TO ADD Trigger Warning for Trauma] !
A childhood full of trauma with no one listening led me to the psych ward in a psychotic catatonic state at the age of 19. The psychiatric system became increasingly violent and critical of me over the decades, which in many ways worsened my psychiatric state. And because of my psychiatric illnesses, most of my medical issues were ignored and dismissed as psychiatric problems. So my meltdowns in many respects got worse over the decades because of more trauma and more of not being listened to. After many years of symptoms, in 2012, I had another complete psychotic episode. But this episode was different than the others because, unlike the other times, this time it wasn't responsive to the assaults by staff to forcibly inject me with antipsychotic meds, or locking me in solitary confinement, or tying me to the bed in four-point restraints. After three months of this torture, I had the worst meltdown (full of all the beautiful variants of the F word) with the treating psychiatrist and peeved him off so much that he agreed to discharge me AMA (against medical advice). Long story short, it turned out I was in thyroid storm and almost died. I had Graves disease. And in 2014, 1-1/2 years later, I was also diagnosed with breast cancer and peripheral neuropathy. These three illnesses explained all the symptoms I had been complaining about for a few years prior to 2012, which were all dismissed due to my psychiatric illnesses.
In 2012 after the psychiatric hospitalisation, I undertook four legal proceedings to try to change my psychiatric care. What these proceedings made very clear was that I would never be safe in Canada. So I came to Spain in 2014. Apart from a few basics, when I came here, I couldn't speak Spanish, but I knew I didn't have a fighting chance in Canada - where I could speak English clear as a bell.
It's been a humbling lesson to have one situation after another where I can't understand people and/or they can't understand me. Because it happens so frequently, I don't have the energy to get upset all the time and freak out when people don't understand me. So ironically by not being understood and by not understanding others, I've learned to just let go of that goal. Like Leonard Cohen says in his song 'Anthem', "Forget your perfect offering." Loose understanding is okay by me now - from both sides. ๐
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A classic indeed. I've seen The Full Monty about a hundred times. And, yes, I saw the series on Disney. Beautiful. It's rare gem to explore the soft and vulnerable side of men. A real gem.
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I somehow doubt the Mods would approve footage of in mid meltdown.
Lots of bad language.
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I won't tell if you won't. ๐
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I angry stress pace a lot, cannot sit down for more than 10 seconds. Hands through hair constantly too ๐
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@Holly_Scope I remember as a kid one of my visiting uncles used to do that and he'd be chain-smoking at the same time. We had wooden floors and being Spanish he didn't take his shoes off when inside. He wore loud-heeled dress shoes. Once in a while he would stop briefly to mumble something unintelligible to himself. To this day, the memory is still so vivid of the sound of his clacking shoes, the smell of the smoke, and the sight of him smoking and pacing back and forth the length of the living room.
I'm wondering if anyone has a safe person that they can explode with? I'm allowed to let loose with my brother, but I don't direct it at him. However, I'm doing private lessons for martial arts, and in the first lesson (I've had two) the instructor told me that I shouldn't talk when I'm under attack, because it takes away from my focus with my body and the situation. But I asked him if he would be okay if I swore at him, because for me I find it really helpful to let loose. So I said I would keep it simple like F you and F off and just plain sweet old F. He agreed and I can't tell you how delightfully deliciously liberating it is! LOL. I should probably tip him for this! So do any of you have anyone similar to this who allows you to blow up and even swear?
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Your uncle sounds like a deep thinker. I'm pleased to hear someone else does this as I felt mine so different to everyone else's answer.
That's made me chuckle @StarryEyed. I bet he probably needs a session after being swore at to get his frustration out haha. It does sound like a great way to get rid of tension though. Can I ask what martial art you're learning?
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