A fair bite of the apple......for everyone - By way of V_s introduction

V_s

Scope article:

“A fair bite of the Apple,

The wobbly apple falls from the same tree as the perfect one. None of its flavour is impaired by its exterior appearance. It’s still as sweet and juicy as the perfect one. The first bite proves its merit.

Shape, size, looks, illness, grief, disability and pain all play their part in how we look and feel. Respect and understanding are all we ask. Instead of being treated as some imperfection on the side of the road who are holding people up. Slow means life is difficult. We can do almost anything slowly. Precisely, but not instantly.

Living as a disabled person is different. Of which I became acutely aware after a silly fall from a ladder. Fifteen years ago. Not only did it smash my ankle irreversibly the accident further heightened my anxiety and depression. My fear of fight and flight became so greatly enhanced that my nerves began to go into full alert at the slightest sound.

Already acutely aware of my father’s years of torment with his war disability and drunken nightly traumas. It took him more than twenty-six years, after he was shot twice during WW2 and the threat of his doctor taking away his morphine injections, to agree to have his leg amputated. Not an easy decision for anyone.

I was thirteen years old at the time. So traumatised was my father that he rang me at Pitsford boarding school, while he was under the anaesthetic beging me to come to the hospital and see what they had done and help him. This was the first place I saw people without limbs. The Orthopaedic hospital in Harborne, even I didn’t realise how much the patients suffered there. They were brave, full of pain and lost. All of them preparing to start a new journey in life. A different journey. That was in 1972……

It opened my awareness up to a very new world. Now at sixty-seven, if by sharing my stories, and bringing disability and society's need to ensure that accessibility is to help every single person to get out of their home to go to face the work environment or to dare to slither about like I do for the sake of an adventure. My writing mission has been worth all the effort I put into doing it.

Giving people the opportunity to share my journeys and listen to my talks is my way to help dispel the myths……..It is not a lifestyle choice we make freely to become ill. Whether we are born with or develop later in life, a mental or physical disability. It is far from a choice we would ever make lightly. For most of us, I’d imagine it is the greatest shock we could ever encounter.

A life choice is the desire to do the things others do. Find a way to follow our dreams. Disability doesn’t lessen anyone’s need to travel and work. It makes us want to do what we can’t even more. Like most things in life, once we have taken the first bite, we want to finish the rest of the cake. We will persevere until we find a way to achieve our ambitions. What we need is a little assistance and empathy. No special favours.

If we lose or forget our teeth. We will get a knife and cut the apple or cake into small slices and chew it. We won’t give up eating it. So why should we give up the opportunity to do the things we want to in life because we are a little different?

PIP is hard to complete. Humiliating and makes us feel unworthy because its questions are so thoughtless and cut to the core. If the DWP wants to help us with benefits, why make them so difficult to apply for? As one who really found PIP and DWP questions so degrading and left me feeling as if I was asking for something I was not entitled to. The system really made me feel like my NI contributions were not for me. For three years, I had to fight my case and then only because my doctor was appalled at how I was treated. When he advised me to fight. "Did I sit down and really go for it."

By transforming attitudes and recognising how we can add value and experience in the workplace, the time and quality effort we could contribute would be invaluable to your workplace, and our feeling of value to society would be tremendous. If there are disabled people out there who don’t want to come out to the workplace or to see that light of day. Maybe society has already pushed them to give up. I get so sick of being tutted at by people or pushed so closely and asked to move. It’s frightening. If I fall and my ankle joint comes out of its comfort zone. I’ll be in agony for days after.

Creating a society that would welcome us and embrace our differences would really be the best first step to putting your arms out and inviting us into your world. Trust me, we are all unique in our own way. Each person's diversity is a special gift. Just give us a chance to share it.

Rachel_Scope

Hi @V_s and welcome to the community. Thank you for sharing your story. It's clear that you have been through a lot in your life.

It's a difficult world for disabled people and I'm sure there are a lot of members who can empathise with this.

Bluebell21

Hi @V_s welcome to the Community from me too. I hope you enjoy your time on the forum. Any questions just ask.

Thank you for sharing your story.

Have a look around and join in when you are ready.

Take care.

V_s

It's time the market place opened up for everyone. More positive discussion with employers is needed. What would you like to do?

V_s

Thanks, Bluebell21.