Scared that I may never work again

andyb1978

Hi im andy new to all this and not sure what to say not great at selling due to dislecsia i have polycistic kiddney disease and also suffering leg problems not sure exsactly what it is on going at hospital some hints to gout and arthritis possible but it dose cause me not to walk very well and its scaring me that i may never work again its a big part off my life i drive lorrys and would live to go back in to plant oporating 360 diggers jcb artic dumper have npor tickets but need tranning on this to change to cpcs im hopping to be able to do something as i love my kidds and family too much just to give in and stop ive only just started getting like this just over a year now keep trying to do od shift driving but it hurts so much and ny strethe is low tierd a lot off the the time but i think that is kkidney problem but lazyness is part of it i realy could do with some guidance truth  skills over years  are michnical cars
Garden work fencing decking painting decor hgv driving plant oporating  some i try some hurt to badly so any help and advice please 

abstractLucas

Hi Andy,
I'm sorry you're having such a difficult time at the moment - it sounds like you have a lot to deal with.  It must be frightening to have so much pain when you're trying to do the things that you've been doing for so long, especially when you're worrying that you might not be able to get back to work and take care of your family.
At the moment you need to look after your own health before you push yourself into getting back to work, and try not to look too far into the future.  I know that is easier said than done, but by pushing yourself now to do tasks that your body isn't up to you might just be making your recovery take even longer.
I wish there was an easy answer or piece of advice that I could give you which would make everything okay, but sadly life doesn't work like that.  Try to take it easy while you're in so much pain, and might it be worth asking your doctor if you can be referred to a pain management clinic?  There are doctors who are experts in finding combinations of medicines and gentle stretching exercises and things which can help you get in control of your pain and this might make a big difference to your energy levels too - being in pain is exhausting.
I hope you feel better soon.
Lucas

andyb1978

Thanks  lucas it is very raw at moment i have to say it something i never though would happen to me at this stage in life but i think you are right i will talk with doctor on pain clinic for sure and see what more can be done thank u for your support and advice as it is defo very hard to just stop everything just like that its weird and you feel quite useless at times but hopefully i can turn this around 

abstractLucas

I'm sure that you can turn it around Andy - just try and keep in mind that your focus - for the moment, for right now - needs to be on your health.  I'm certain that no one else thinks you are useless, but having worked so hard for so long on very physical jobs it will be very difficult to change your mindset.  Dealing with doctors and having trouble getting around and hurting is tiring, so your energy needs to all go towards yourself at the moment.  Try and think about any suggestions that your doctors have come up with that seem sensible and achievable, and give them a go.  But remember, if they have suggested you go for a short gentle stroll each day then they don't mean run a marathon!  Be kind to yourself, and take things slowly.
I'm glad that you are feeling supported - that's what we're here for!
Lucas

Debbie_Alumni

Hi @andyb1978,

Thanks for posting. I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling with your health at the moment. Thank you to @abstractLucas for their advice which is really good advice. We tend to get so lost in the worry of what if's that we lose focus on managing our health and aiding recovery.
It's not unusual to feel how you're feeling. A lot of people depend on you and it's hard coming to terms with new limitations you're experiencing. It can take ages to get through the system and get diagnosed. You have to wait for referrals, tests and lots of waiting to find out the root cause/s of the health problem. The worst thing you can do is panic and start thinking too far ahead into the future because things change all the time and what you're feeling now might not be the same in a few months time with the right treatment.
It's absolutely paramount that you focus on your health as much as you can. Read about your conditions and learn about how they affect you and how your body copes and reacts to them. Understanding your condition and understanding your limitations is all part of the healing process.

There's lots that can be done to help you stay in work and if you have to stop working in order to get well again then there's help available to support you while you do this. It can be hard to get the support in the first place but it is there. 

So let's step back and think about how things are today and what we can do to start pointing you in the right direction. 
It would be really helpful for me to know more about your household and your current income and housing status. You might not feel comfortable sharing this information on the community so if you would prefer to talk to me privately, send me a message on here or to helpline@scope.org.uk we can arrange a telephone appointment if this would be helpful.

Have a good weekend and try to get some rest. 

Best wishes
Debbie