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Need advice about battling social services for care

BrendaBrenda Member Posts: 7 Listener
Hi

Silly hour of the day but that's how it affects your health when you're having a battle with social services.   I have a 30 yr old son with cerebral palsy and learning disabilities who lives independently.  He changed his care agency on Jan 1st this year as the last one weren't able to cover the hours so I was doing upwards of 70hrs, I'm 67.   I am now embroiled in a battle with the new company, even after giving them notice to finish on 25 Feb, as they have manipulated my son, as he is easily lead, to keep them.   The social worker has assessed his mental capacity and even though he is not convinced my son totally understood he called a 'Best interest' meeting.  I have a friend and between us we have looked at all the reasons why they do not meet his very complex needs and written our findings and handed out at a meeting yesterday.  When my son got upset they suggested to the social worker to have another meeting without him which is later today, gives them time to look at our reasons and build their own response.   Why do I feel so helplesss when I know we have his best interests at heart and have all the relevant information regarding his learning disability and the social worker is also supporting us to employ our own staff to actually get it absolutely right.

Is there anyone out there who has had a similar experience?  I would wecome any support or advice.

If we come through this experience positively I feel like becoming an advocate for people in my position.

Thanks for reading  Brenda

Replies

  • GeoffBosworth195661GeoffBosworth195661 Member Posts: 163 Pioneering
    Good morning @Brenda you sounding very stressed out which is understandable with all this going on around you. In most areas we have some very good accommodations for people like your son that have the correct way of handling his housing and looking after is well being. Yes in certain parts of the country there are alarming cut backs but the Government are obliged to make sure your Son as the correct housing, Correct support for your sons condition and safety, Scope, Sense, Rowntree, about me, these are areas a top of my head who can advice and sought this out and point in the right direction. Your son as rights and they should not be neglected no matter what they say.  
  • BrendaBrenda Member Posts: 7 Listener
    Hi Geoff, thank you for your reply, I'm not usually up at that hour of the day or this hour in the morning but at least I did go back to sleep even if it was for a short time.  The meeting is at 2pm so I will let you know how it goes.   I will go to the court of protection if I have to.   The housing is another matter but again I will chat later if that's ok.  kind regards Brenda


  • GeoffBosworth195661GeoffBosworth195661 Member Posts: 163 Pioneering
    Hello @Brenda that's fine I know it is hard but try no overt stress your self it does not help. Try not let things around you build up just have bullet points to do s tick each one of this will be a better way of the stress and it will unwind as you tick each one off. Hope every thing goes well for you today Brenda.   
  • Sam_ScopeSam_Scope Member Posts: 7,732 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @Brenda welcome to the community, you sound like you are having a really tough time.  The community is really friendly and supportive and I hope some members will have experience of this and be able to offer some help.

    You can also call the Scope helpline on 0808 800 3333 if you wanted to speak to an advisor.
    Best of luck  :)
    Scope
    Senior online community officer
  • BrendaBrenda Member Posts: 7 Listener
    Hi Sam,

    Thank you for getting back to me.  It is lovely to have support from you.  I tried the helpline this morning but unfortunately they appear to be inundated with caller.   That doesn't surprise me at all.  I may email them later if I need to.

    A consequence of this last few weeks is that in the past I have said about becoming an advocate and now I feel that it is even more imposrtant to have spport.   I have a friend who is amazing and has helped me so much.

    I'll let you know how it goes. 

    Kind regards Brenda
  • Sam_ScopeSam_Scope Member Posts: 7,732 Disability Gamechanger
    The helpline do get ever so busy, they are a great team and it is worth you keeping on trying.  Sorry you couldnt get through first time.

    @Kirsty_Scope @DebbieVoakes @gillcoddington work at the helpline and come on the community to help whenever they can, so they may be able to advise from here.  You can email them like you said on [email protected] 

    I'm glad you have the support of your friend, it's times like these that we have to reach out to loved ones and ask for help.
    Scope
    Senior online community officer
  • Hello @Brenda,

    Unfortunately at the helpline the system we use for handling calls has 'gone down' which means no calls are able to get through at the moment - I am chasing this as a priority this morning, so this will be why you were unable to get through. I'm so sorry for the inconvenience.

    I'm also sorry to hear how stressful things are for you all at the moment - sometimes the choice of words, and the way the social care system presents itself comes across as quite daunting  to many people so your not alone with your experience. Hopefully I can offer a little reassurance.

    A best interests meeting will take place if there is any doubt of the individual in question having full mental capacity - as you mention your son's social worker wasn't convinced your son totally understood everything, which is why he would have scheduled the best interests meeting. This is very common practice, as by law if there is any doubt around capacity and a decision has to be made for an adult (16+ year of age) a best interests meeting has to take place (this is due to the Mental Capacity Act 2005).

    Although this seems like a scary situation to be involved in, its worth knowing that the key principles behind best interest meetings are to ensure that the individual (your son) remains key, at the centre of any decision making. The process has to be transparent, and all professionals that support your son and the views of any supporting family members have to be taken into account when making the decision. If you want to read a little more about the process (without getting too overwhelmed) there are some really useful guides to best interest meetings here:

    http://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/legal-rights/mental-capacity-act-2005/best-interests

    For much more information on this, the social care institute of excellence have a website with various case studies of this process:

    http://www.scie.org.uk/mca-directory/making-decisions/#best-interests-decision-making-tools

    Sometimes not knowing why all these things/meetings are taking place can make people feel really hopeless - when all it takes is perhaps someone to explain the process to reduce the anxiety of it all!

    I hope this was helpful - by all means your more than welcome to contact us at the helpline (phones back up and running permitted). If you do want to email us the address is [email protected]

    Let us know how you get on later today.

    Best wishes,

    Kirsty

    Scope helpline

  • BrendaBrenda Member Posts: 7 Listener
    Hi Kirsty,

    Thank you and eventually I did manage to get intouch.  I am quite concerned now as the lady I spoke to explained about Court of Protection.  The evidence against the new company is quite extensive, even though they have only been on board since 1/1/17.  It is now hoped the social worker listens this afternoon as to why the company need to finish as I gave notice for 25th Feb.

    I'm trying to keep calm but it is all very stressful.

    Kind regards Brenda
  • Hi @Brenda,

    Hopefully your meeting will be better that you think - do let us know how you get on.

    Best wishes,

    Kirsty

    Scope helpline

  • BrendaBrenda Member Posts: 7 Listener
    Hi Kirsty,

    The meeting went fairly ok thanks to a friend who took me out for 5mins to calm down as she could see I was being goaded and rising to being bullied.  Well that's my opinion which she agreed with.

    Although we are going ahead with Penderels to employ staff to work with my son so we have less anxiety, hopefully, we have agreed to stay with the care company until that is in place.  I have refused to work with the one person who I feel is a bully.

    I'm not sure how posts work and if Sam and Geoff can read this post! Thank you anyway for info and posts.

    Kind regards

    Brenda
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