Welcome to our new group on dealing with chronic pain

Chris_Alumni

Chronic pain is generally defined as pain that lasts for more than a couple of months. It can be highly disruptive to your life and happiness, and can be caused by a variety of reasons. For whatever reason you suffer from chronic pain, this discussion group is a place to share your experiences and tips, and to ask advice on dealing with chronic pain.

Click the 'New discussion' button in the top right to start a new conversation. Or respond to one of the discussions already taking place.

Chronic1

Hi,I just joined the group,I have suffered from chronic pain since my spine operation in April 2015,I have metal work on my spine,I have never had1 day pain free,I feel I am doomed to a life of poppin painkillers just to get thru the day,my pain is just goin worse.

Libbyanne

Hi, I too have suffered from chronic pain for many years resulting in 2 operations the last 1 was a spinal fusion. It's not always easy to try and find any joy when you're in the midst of the most horrendous pain but please do try should it only be the fact that you were able to open your eyes that morning. When I'm at my lowest and even if the pain has gone on longer than before I always keep in mind that I've got through times like it before so I'll get through this battle. This is just my take on life with chronic pain but I hope this maybe lets someone know that they're not on their own when dealing with it

Misscleo

Libbyanne what a nice post and i totaly agree with you

Libbyanne

Thank you Misscleo you're really kind, sometimes it can be really to say or write words like that but not always easy to live by

janejr

Libbyanne thank you for your advice on chronic pain. You are right  Sometimes I feel pain has taken over my life because when it's bad I can't think of anything else. When I try all the things that usually ease it and it doesn't work I feel that helpless and there's nothing else left but cry. Hate having to take pain killers all the time as don't want to feel wasted all day every day but given the choice of feeling out of it or being in agony then I'll take pain killers. 

Kirstie74

Hi, I have fibromyalgia and arthritis. In pain every day and raking painkillers. Someday I can't go out due to the pain and have cancelled so many nights out or get together that certain friends don't bother anymore. I also have a daughter, 6 year old, whom has autisma. You find out who your true friends are when you're in it his situation. 

Libbyanne

Hi Kirstie74, you definitely do find out who your true friends are when you have a chronic illness. I too have had to cancel so many nights out and other occasions that now people don't even bother to ask me now and it really upsets me when I see photos or hear about how great the night out was from others. What I have tried to do is to keep some sort of contact with my friends either by text or phone call explaining that i will do my best to go on nights out or for a coffee but to not be offended if I cannot go out. Sometimes even though I am in pain I push myself to go out as the enjoyment of being out and having a laugh can actually make me less focused on the pain and in turn I don't feel so bad then. I'm sorry for the long post and whatever you do please don't stop trying

Libbyanne

Hi janejr, on a day that your not feeling great and you want to cry go ahead and cry as I feel it doesn't do any harm. When I'm having a flare up of my pain I always focus on the fact that I've got through other flare ups many times before and I'll get through this one. I know it's not always easy to be positive when you're in horrendous pain but always try to find something positive to focus on and get through it, should it be the fact that you only managed get yourself into a sitting position on the side of your bed that day. Just take it in small steps and remind yourself that you can get through it! Take care

janejr

Hi Libbyanne and Kirstie74 your right about friends I have had family members be the same with me. My daughter phoned me the other day and asked how I was and when i told her she sounded annoyed and said I'm not being funny but your always ill. Took me by surprise and all I could say was well it is as it is I can't help it. Wasn't till afterward I suddenly thought she obviously wasn't happy because she wanted me to do something with her or for her. Upset me , I'm already depressed because of my condition and her attitude made me feel worse. 

mummymort

Hi all. I have just joined & was reading your posts . I have the same problem with friends , alot have faded away mainly because i can't manage to go out or they are going somewhere i can't get into, being in a wheelchair.  If i was being honest i can say i have 4 good true friends who keep in touch regularly & my mum who is amazingly. She keeps going when i really feel down & does so much for me, so i would say mum is my best friend. 

Niamh

It is very hard, have any of you managed to keep a job with the pain?

vlismassarah

I too have lost many friends..I try to think of something positive like that I have a roof over my head, but there are times I get so low ..thinking of people worse off helps..poor kids in terrible pain..at least I've had 40 years no pain..I'm v v isolated where I live. The morphine makes me so sleepy but I couldn't cope without. Most my friends have no room for a wheelchair so I rely lot on my husband ..but he works..you are right we should be pleased even if we just make it to the sofa

debbiedo49

@Niamh yes I am working part time. Its only 6 hours per week, 1.5 hours per day and thats me returning to supported work after 8 years away. I started with volunteering once per week and really enjoyed it and it lifted my mood. So I took the plunge after 6 months or so. I know what I can and cant do and I stick to it. I crash after it every time. 

rachel0511

Niamh said:

It is very hard, have any of you managed to keep a job with the pain?

I had a car accident 11 years ago that has left me with chronic back pain and degenerative disc disease, and recently been diagnosed with fibromyalgia....I have managed to work full time..with very understanding employers...I crawl through the day and then I’m wiped out by the time I get home....I have my moments of tears at home, while putting on a brave face at work, telling everyone i’m fine....but goodness it is hard. I feel like I miss out on lots of family things and time with friends as the effort it takes to go out is just exhausting, it is so refreshing to read such lovely posts about how everyone copes...it doesn’t make you feel quite so alone

Tigermoth42

Hi @rachel0511 and everyone, I too have DDD with chronic pain syndrome, arthritis and possible fibro in addition to horrible anxiety and depression. You’re an inspiration all of you who manage to work full time with your pain, I know how you feel missing out on events. With the best will in the world, I make arrangements to see family etc but, when the day comes, I more often than not wish I hadn’t committed myself, I have to take each day as it comes and feel I’m letting everyone down by cancelling. I try to keep my mind off things by reading, watching spooky movies and, when arthritis allows, knitting. I’m going to try and get back into painting if I can. I brood a lot on the future which isn’t good so I’m just learning to take each day as it comes. Hugs to you all 

minxykat

hi new member here i suffer from fibro have done for several years now also copd stage 1 heart failure osteo in both hips and both knees ddd and bells palsy...i struggle mostly with fibro and getting people to understand and believe how bad the flares can be i live on morphine and morphine patches also valium and various drugs but sometimes even thats not enough to help ....then on a good day when i can get out and about ive been abused in the street for just being lazy!!....im slowly losing my social life as i would rather be at home in bed than go out and sit in pain all night ive had to retire from work due to my fibro..i was a psychiatric nurse and found fibro fog was having an effect on me ...does anyone else find the fog unbearable? i ask my son a question and then ask him the same thing 2 mins later ...ive put washing in the fridge ...and my latest was i was on my mobile to my partner and was leaving the house and said ive left my phone indoors id better go bk and get it!!...i was actually on it at the time holding it to my ear!!!anyone else suffer this??

sparton316

I suffer with arthritis epilepsy and other medical conditions and I find the best thing is to arrange something and look forward to it even you can't go it gives you a boost and something to look forward to. Dont give up and don't let the pain ruin your life. Easier said than done I know but try. All my love and best wishes.

ClaireSaul

Morning All,
Firstly apologies for having been absent for a couple of weeks - one of the probs of us "advisors" also being sufferers is that we have our own health flares!!  For me it has been having 3 colonoscopies in 3 weeks with the dreaded bowel prep....this didn't work due to my connective tissue disorder, so on the final occasion I was on clear fluids for 3 days and have struggled to get back on my feet.  Needless to say my pain has flared everywhere and everything has been upset...then father in law had a stroke....
Enough of me wittering, but I am back and hope to join chats to give support and advice!
Claire x

ClaireSaul

@minxykat - I know I've just replied to another comment, but as one ex nurse to another...I get it!!  My brain fog has become so much worse in the last couple of years, and I no longer take opiates regularly so can't blame them!  My social life has also changed dramatically and I think that family and friends find it difficult to understand how our condition can change so quickly - we are not letting people down at the last minute intentionally, it is not easy to plan in advance, but this doesn't mean that we don't want to be included in plans now.  I must admit that many of my social contacts are now online through groups such as this, facebook, specific health groups (I have Ehlers Danlos) and blogging.  
The brain fog specifically does cause me grief though as at times I will forget something within minutes of being told/asked.  I forget to answer emails and texts/messages and like you find myself asking the kids the same thing several times.  I have struggled round the house looking for a walking stick, whilst holding it in my hand!!  Recently I managed to attempt a poem to describe brain fog for my blog!
Good to meet you,
Claire

ClaireSaul

sparton316 said:

I suffer with arthritis epilepsy and other medical conditions and I find the best thing is to arrange something and look forward to it even you can't go it gives you a boost and something to look forward to. Dont give up and don't let the pain ruin your life. Easier said than done I know but try. All my love and best wishes.

I try to live by this philosophy too.  On bad days it can be easier said than done,  but it really does help, doesn't it?  There are always people to speak to online who understand, which I have found invaluable.
Claire