Hi, my name is Lucymax1!

Lucymax1

Hiya this is my first time communicating with anyone on a computer but im pleased with myself as i am very technophobic and have been left behind when it comes to social media. Ive battled with depression all my life since and over the years ive developed anxiety disorder, eating disorder, agoraphobia, ocd and the list goes on of other mental health disorders. I have now been diagnosed with Borderline personality disorder, body dismorphia and one or two other things thrown in; moan moan moan! i have no family support apart from my 12year old Daughter but shes great. I attempted suicide 18 months ago after years and years of fighting with my mind body and soul and my inner anguish Not  to end my life! I obviously didnt achieve it lol! From that point of that i was taken to hospital to now every family member has totally ignored me and treated me like Im worthless. Im relieved to be rid of them to be honest haha, im sooo different to them all and ive been their scapegoat for over 35 yrs and left me with no selfworth and mental confusion. I apologise that my very first interaction with yourselves is so much 'woe is me' i need to interact with people who live and understand the depths of mental illness and how it affects our thoughts,feelings and  how it affects every day life.  Thank you

steve51

Hi @Lucymax1

Welcome to our website and online community.

Sorry to hear about your journey to date !!!!

Please please don't apologise that's what are all here for !!!!

Sam_Alumni

Hi @Lucymax1 welcome to the community and thank you for sharing your story, this is a safe and friendly space for people to chat.

Take a look around, you can find all the latest discussions here and look through the categories here.

Mia_Alumni

Hi Lucy, 

I am so pleased that you've taken the brave step of communicating for the first time online. Well done, you should be really proud of yourself for reaching out! I am glad you chose us, as this is a very safe and nonjudgmental environment for you to open up in.

Sometimes you do just need to get it all out, and there's nothing wrong with that. You have mentioned a number of conditions that must be so overwhelming and difficult to deal with. Remember, even though it sometimes feels like it, you are not alone! I hope you may be able to connect with people experiencing similar difficulties.

Talking can be therapeutic for many people.  If you would like some emotional support with any of what you're going through, consider contacting The Samaritans. Available 24/7, 365 days of the year, this confidential service is there for anyone experiencing feelings of distress, despair, or suicidal feelings. Their number is free to call on 116 123. 

I really hope you find our community helpful.

Take care of yourself, 

Mia

ClydeBuilt

Hello LM
fraid im new to this forum, but more than familiar with some of your problems more often than I would like ?
I can only suggest something that does work for me sometimes?
Think of something, anything, that used to make you feel okay, not blindingly ecstatic just somewhere above grumpy is fine. And do it again

It will in no way make you feel that great, but it makes you think of a pleasant experience and what it entails for just a bit and from there try to swim back to normality ?
I use it to escape from time to time, I visit the local fishing tackle shop and buy 'stuff' I know I will prob never use. But it means Im not so keyed on XYZ thats putting me in the 'black place' if you get me ???

Bill

Sam_Alumni

How are you doing @Lucymax1 ?