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AliW Member Posts: 4 Listener
Can anyone offer any advice about safe dating sites .....


  • Chaoskay
    Chaoskay Member Posts: 74 Courageous
    Hiya @AliW
    It's lovely to meet you and welcome to the forums. I'm afraid have no experience in this area but there is a section on here that deals with relationships.  I'm sure someone helpful will answer your questions there.
    Looking forward to seeing your posts and I hope you'll find the information here helpful and that you'll get to know new friends.  
    All the best,  K 
  • Topkitten
    Topkitten Member Posts: 1,285 Pioneering
    There is no such thing as a safe or an unsafe dating site. Some are more difficult to deal with due to the type of people who are members but that still doesn't make them unsafe.

    Safe dating is all about how you go about arranging the dates and how you deal with the people.

    Firstly, never rush into meeting people. Use the site to get to know them a little but remember that a lot of people only put in the good things about themselves and some downright lie. False pictures are common as is a completely incorrect age. Disabilities are very frequently supressed or lied about also. So try to assess people by the answers to questions or statements they make. If they press you to meet up then do not do so as, chances are, they are most likely looking for sex rather than a relationship.

    When you do agree to meet choose daylight hours and busy places. Be patient and try to get as much information as you can whilst observing their responses and attitudes, especially those to other people around you. They will make more of an effort to be appealing to you than other people they are not meeting with.

    It seems common now to meet with a number of people before deciding on second dates. Personally I think this is detestable but then I am old and old-fashioned.

    Safety relies on common sense and patience.

    All this assumes you are looking for a relationship ofc. Which sites you might use would depend on whether you are disabled yourself or whether you care for someone who is. I didn't check your profile but then most profiles here give very little information anyway so probably wouldn't have helped me narrow ot down any further,

    "I'm on the wrong side of heaven and the righteous side of hell" - from Wrong side of heaven by Five Finger Death Punch.
  • AliW
    AliW Member Posts: 4 Listener
    Thank you - caution is the most important element here.. I wondered if there were any positive experiences but you are right...... it’s very individual . AliW
  • Topkitten
    Topkitten Member Posts: 1,285 Pioneering
    edited December 2017
    @AliW my personal experiences have been negative but then it is more difficult for a man due to the ratio of men to women. There is also the fact that a lot of women will not initiate contact especially when they get interest without needing to do so.

    I have heard of positive experiences but they are always between people I do not know. It does seem though that we are stuck with such contact methods. Personally I prefer contacts made through BB's and, in fact, met my last partner that way but I cannot recommend any that might be useful to you as I have not really considered dating seriously for a decade or so.

    "I'm on the wrong side of heaven and the righteous side of hell" - from Wrong side of heaven by Five Finger Death Punch.
  • feir
    feir Member Posts: 395 Pioneering
    i haven't put i'm disabled on any dating sites because many men fetishize everything they can about women, i'm guessing they would fetishize that too. i did join one mixed able bodied/disability website and stopped using it now i have to pay to, it's expensive.

    my experience of  normal sites has been mildly successful, in that i gain interest really easily but also negative in that men always want to rush everything so they can move onto the next person. i don't think a lot of people are looking for anything much on these sites if i'm honest. and so many people are just looking to hook up, last guy i met was separated apparently, his wife messaged me to let me know he wasn't. so yeah, dating online isn't that great and i kind of give up a lot of the time now, not really bothered anyway i've got a lot  on my plate at the moment and hopefully will be meeting someone i've been chatting to for almost 2 years when we're able to.

  • Neil2017
    Neil2017 Member Posts: 155 Courageous
    Personally I think you’re better off getting to social groups or activities that you can afford to do and are able to get to. 


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