I feel so very lonely being disabled

jueboo
jueboo Community member Posts: 1 Listener
edited January 2018 in Everyday life
I feel so very lonely being disabled, all my friends walked away one by one.
Then my partner left me because he said he couldn't handle me being ill but really it was because he left me for someone younger and healthy 
I have multiple sclerosis and arthritis use a wheel chair but can walk a little
When I did try to go out and meet someone I was battered and raped so I have now been by myself for 4 years..I've been to scared to go out alone, I won't answer my own front door and to scared to even answer my own phone in case my speech sounds funny and people think I'm drunk
I do have my own family and grandchildren..my daughter is also my cater.
I would love to find help to go places and do things with other disabled people.
I stay in bed most days and really live my life through my tv but would really love to have a proper life
I'm just really waiting to die that's how I feel my life is and have NO real place in society, do other disabled people feel like this and I've also tried to take my own life many times 
Please help me I don't know how to go on ...

Comments

  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,283 Championing
    Hello @jueboo   Welcome to the forum.  Pleased to meet you Sorry about what is happening.  I feel for you.  I do understand what you are going through.  I live a life of loneliness.  My only comfort is getting to speak to people like yourself.  I know I had my problems but this is not about me.  This is about you.  What would like to do with your life?  You have made a start talking about yourself on here.  Thank you for being honest and open.  Please can I say you have family daughter and grandchildren.  They mean a lot to you.  I would just like to say also have a look on the web for any support groups in your area.  I know life is tough and it is not easy. I had these feelings of self worth and how we are perceived in society.  That is why I come on here.  Be with people who care about me and give me a lift and support everyday.  Please can I also suggest talk to some one in SCOPE either on line or on the phone.  The support network is fantastic and the people here give you a meaning to move on during the day.  I have some days down days and have been using this forum to air my problems and grievances.  I know and get support from people who are like me and you.  Talking helps.  I do care and so do this community.  Sending you a message of support.  There will others today who will connect with your story and are willing to listen.  I am here to listen.  There will be people from our community who will offer love and support and try to advise.  Best wishes hope to speak to you soon.
  • Neil2017
    Neil2017 Community member Posts: 154 Contributor
    Hi @jueboo
    And welcome to tge forums. Yes agree with @thespiceman that there is a lot of support on here.

    is there not a support and social group for people with multiple sclerosis in your area? That would be my first suggestion. Or some sort of multiple disabilities support group. And if you can’t find anything in that what about a website called Meetup.com. This has many different types of social so usually will have something that suits
  • Jazzguitar
    Jazzguitar Community member Posts: 175 Contributor
    You are not alone. We are all here. We understand. I get lonely too. And I am depressed. But there are very nice people here. Beville in Plymouth Devon
  • Geoark
    Geoark Community member Posts: 1,463 Championing
    Hello @jueboo and welcome to the community.

    There have been some good suggestions here and disability support groups, if local can be good. However you might also want to consider broadening your horizons a little. 

    For example if there is anything you used to enjoy doing that you don't any more there might be local groups in which you could persue your interests.

    Another idea, which is often laughed at these days, is if there is a local Womens Institute near you. It is about much more than jam making and crafts.

    Plus it does not need to be one or the other, disabled people, non disabled or a mixture. To develop a healthy social life you need to look at what is out there and be prepared to try a few new things. 

    From what you have said you are likely to find any kind of activity and meeting new people difficult. Even if it is with your daughter why not try to get out more regular when the weather gets warmer. Even if its just for 30 minutes. Sorry not knowing if you live in a city, town or rural area makes it difficult to come up with ideas for you.
  • Topkitten
    Topkitten Community member Posts: 1,275 Trailblazing
    Needing help to leave the house means there is little for you to do unless there is a group in your area, usually a smaller charity, who can help in that way. Unfortunately these are few and far between. I am sorry you were attacked in such a way, it is absolutely disgusting that it was allowed to happen. Again though we are provided with little, if any, protection from abusers. In that respect I am lucky being both male and fairly stockily built, even in a wheelchair people don't mess with me.

    A bit too far from me is a small charity that runs a disability centre. For people in your condition they provide transport if you live close enough. I don't qualify but at the moment I can still drive so once again I am lucky. If you can locate such a place / organisation near you or within moving distance perhaps you could get help that way.

    Personally I spent 2 years completely housebound following my GP's instructions and everything I suffer from became much worse. It has only begun to improve since I disregard the GP and went out unsafely. That started 3,5 years ago and since then I have attempted suicide 8-10 times and overdosed just to cope another dozen or more. I do understand how you feel. Only wish I could offer something more positive.

    We are becoming a down trodden minority and I do not see things improving much in the near future, not until the government wakes up and does something for our benefit instead of theirs. I do not see this happening in reality.

    TK