Autism and not leaving the house - help?

donns

Hi my name is Donna and my 16 year old son is austic  and doesn't mix with people or go outside the house . He will not travel on his own or go on any transport . Apart from me driving  him to his college . Has anyone got any advice to help me  xxx thank u and thank u for letting me join the group 

Ami2301

Hi @donns

Welcome to the community!

@sammyjoe I remember from your introduction post that your son is experiencing the same! 

Hopefully we will find the best advice to help!

Ami

Sam_Alumni

Welcome to the community @donns

Have you looked on the National Autistic Society website? They have lots of information and support that might help.

Suzanne_HFAut54

Yes l'd echo that as well as contacting Autistica.org for you to attend their AGM possibly  join their Discover research wing which will give you a lot of insight into your son's inability to engage eith others. My son was diagnosed HF Autistic at aged 16 after many years under CAMHS ( me at aged 62 ! ).  He finds other people difficult if they don't share his special interests. He gets by, conversing on line with  fellow Transformer, League of Legends, Marvel and metal music geeks. They meet up at comic shops and specialist retailers like Forbidden planet. He has also used Mind charity to gain a Befriender he meets for a coffee and a chat every two weeks. He's 24 now and has been in crisis for the last two years. My borough weren't helping, when l asked for a mentoring package and help with extra CBT therapy. As they were failing in their duty of care, l threatened to sue them and suddenly l get offered a social worker and respite care. As your son is much younger l suggest you contact the Transition team in your local Social services and ask for some mentoring and travel buddying to get your son engaged in the wider world.

If he's unsure what he'd like to do going to a day centre at The National Autistic society should help as the activities they gave on offer often stimulate more ideas. My son helped start a music group that uses a rehearsal play space in another borough. He's on medication  which has helped me allay fears that were cripllcri his ability to go outside. We hope that won't be very long term but for right now it seems to be paying off. He has one hour counselling sessions too at Ladbroke grove National Autistic Society branch. That helps.

mossycow

Hi Donna,
Great you've come on here, I'm not in the same position but I have found help and solace through this place.

Before I became more disabled I worked in a main stream college and also with a  local Autism in their school. I loved working with the 15 to 25 year olds as they were such a FABulous bunch. (I had to leave and I miss them ).

Anyway, I noticed you said your son was going to college which is great as that must go some way to help with what you have posted about? Do you feel you have good communication with college? Are there any common interest groups that would help motivate your son (not that I'm suggesting this is caused by lack of motivation). At least, staff there may be able to advise, suggest or even reassure you that this is ok.

I have a friend who is autistic and she likes being alone al ot more than anyone else I know. This may be her personality but from my experience at the school this seemed much more likely in my students that were autistic. My friend says that sometimes she just enjoys being by herself, headphones on as its less tiring than being with others. EVen though she loves us!

Anyway, as I said, not in your situation but wanted to say hi and add my small experience.

What is he doing at college (if not too personal!)

donns

Hi thank u for all your advice I am going to try with the college and c if there is any local help group around me x

dolllady

Hi @donns
my son is very similar by what I have read. Except he doesn’t go to school or college at the moment. He also has an online group of friends who he plays games with etc. He is very sociable online but not so face to face! He has no confidence at all unless he’s behind the computer screen. Have you managed to find any support from the college? 

JennJ

If you think your son is depressed too you can try your local chams. I found a help group locally on Facebook by searching. You could also try asking your GP do they know if any help groups and your local council.