I feel like i cant cope

LittleGizmo86

Hi guys,

Sorry i feel like i keep posting lots of rubbish posts. Sorry if i am

I feel like everything is on top of me right now and everything is spiraling. I have a councellor who is off sick so not had sessions for a few weeks which isnt helping.

I applied for pip and go zero award (as ive said on her) and submitted an MR with lots and lots of new evidence. For the first 2 weeks nobody had even noticed it was there (only found it when i called for an update). Realising there would now be more time i sent more extra evidence. One of which was a photo of the nasty head injury i sustained falling over the day after i called them along with the a&e report... just so they can visualie my world. Anyway i rang another 2 weeks later for everyone to seem very confused and passing me round i could tell something wasnt right. The woman made reference to the fact i sent LOTS of really good evidence in and sounded all weird and passed me to a DM. The DM was really lovely and appologised and said a decision had been made i just hadnt received the letter yet. She went all out saying sorry as in her opinion it seemed the decision had been made without looking at the new evidence and said she would look at it again herself. Low and behold the letter came the next day and was word for word exactly the same as the 1st one. Clearly no evidence was looked at she was right. The words still made reference to all the incorrect things made the first time that i had since proven. It is now 2 weeks since that call so i think i should hear this week and the stress of still having a no is killing me.

To top it off i started physio on friday (i have a recent diagnosis of ms) and the physio started asking all weird questions and wondering how i came to be diagnosed with ms. She didnt seem happy and said she wanted to liaise with my gp. Anyway i got a call from my gp today asking me to see him. I had an appointment with him this evening where he was discussing and observing the same things she did. He said he wanted to send me for a DaT scan asap and send me for a sleep study to assess my shakes i get a night. I wasnt really sure what any of it meant and agreed to the tests. I went to my parents tonight and they asked what them tests were so i googled a Dat Scan and read it is a scan they do to measure the amount of dapamine you have when they suspect parkinsons disease. Especially in cases of the 'young onset' form when it might be harder to spot. I am not really going crazy. If i have it i have it not much i can do. Tbf the symptoms of PD do seem to fit better than ms but everything is just happening all at once and im really scared. I cant talk to my family about my feelings as i dont want them to worry to. Sorry for the long post i just need to get it off my chest.

Pippa_Alumni

Thanks for sharing this with us @LittleGizmo86, and I'm so sorry to hear things are tough right now- it's clear that you're dealing with a lot at the moment. Are you appealing the decision? Do let us know if we can be of any assistance in that area.

I really hope your tests go as well as possible and you get the answers you need, whatever they may be. Please do keep us updated, and we'll advise where we can. I hope today is as kind as possible to you! 

LittleGizmo86

Hi @Pippa_Scope

Thank you so much for your lovely words. I will keep you all posted.

Yes im currently in the most long winded MR process ever (explanation for why i call it that above lol). Hopefully i should hear this week fingers crossed for good news. I will go to tribunal if i have to.

Thank you ?

Ami2301

Hi @LittleGizmo86
Sorry to hear your current situation, I really hope everything works out for you! 

susan48

@LittleGizmo86, I hope you get the MR situation fixed soon so you can focus on your scan and tests.
It must be a difficult time but try and smile x

thespiceman

Hello @LittleGizmo86 Pleased to meet you. I am concerned for you and wonder how can I as a member of the community help.  Be supportive.

I understand you have a lot to cope with. No problem in sending rubbish posts by the way . You need to talk and well you need also some one to listen to you.

I have had therapy and many is the time there are not available or go away. Have  a full calendar. So I have coping mechanisms.

Need to write things that bother me . Write them down.  Have some one to talk to either a friend or even have used Samaritans. Has helped.  Use music, relaxation techniques and calm deep breathing.

I have mental health issues get stressed, anxious depression. What I find is to have a diary and put what I need to do in there to do.  Appointments, schedule and other aspects of my life. Then it is in there and I can forget it for a while. Because it helps.

Wish you the best for the test results.  May I add what is important right now is to try to get some support for yourself. You can self refer.  Look on line.

You have concern not telling your parents about your problems. Write it down in a form of a letter. I had to do this to a close friend. Talking to him about my addiction. I could not talk to him face to face but wrote it down. Understood me more.

Could be a solution.  Does help and I know it is something to look at.

All I can say .  

Please take care

@thespiceman

Chloe_Alumni

Hi @LittleGizmo86, thank you for taking the time to share this with us all. I am really sorry to hear about your current situation. We are all thinking about you and wish you the very best of luck with the tests.