Disabled people
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My strange story

sasteemsasteem Member Posts: 3 Listener
edited December 2018 in Disabled people
Hi all   seems strange my  story i suppose  but here goes  I come originally from a travelling family  My father  was a long distance driver    and my mother used to when he was away beat up my self my brother and sister   as a result i found out years later i had brain damage  which now days make it impossible  to stand up and i am now weak in my  limbs

whilst i was still in my teens i joined the army to get away from home i had  i think a good time but  i started to be unable to move like others  I was discharged and i managed to hide it the disability   and became a coal miner i was in pain most of the time but  i had to stop  working   it also cost me  my wife and  children  , 

as well as the pains my body deteriorated  i decided with  the money i had saved to buy a small terrace and see also the world where i met my wife who looks after me  i know i have some mental problems physical problems but i have  the perfect partner  a crazy Estonian  and we have  2 daughters and many grandchildren I still have problems seeing , moving   also my cognitive skill are not as they should be i also get emotional as well 

But  if it dosnt sound  corny i decided that   as the illness has got worse i  WOULD NEVER GIVE IN O IT  .

The weird thing i remember as a kid around 11 years old  poss  part of the brain damage a   Man dressed in white came to me  and said to me . My Name is Micheal and i have come to tell you  you will have a interesting life but a sad one

well thats haas been true in some ways but  I have and never will as i have said  never will give in  life is a pain with illness   but you just get  on with it  one last thing   there is no painkiller that can help me ,  except  i use the cannabis oil   it takes the edge off it

Replies

  • Antonia_AlumniAntonia_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 1,781 Pioneering
    Hi @sasteem

    Thank you for sharing your story with us. I am sorry to hear what you're going through. You have been very brave and determined in your journey, please feel free to let us know how we can support you. :)
  • Sam_AlumniSam_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,731 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @sasteem
    I am so sorry to hear that you have had these struggles. You mentioned that your mother beat you and your siblings, that is awful to hear and I am sorry that you went through this.

    NAPAC (the National Association for People Abused in Childhood) provides lots of support for people who have dealt with abuse in their life, no matter how long ago it was.  They have support tools and also a helpline where you can speak to someone who can offer support and information. The helpline is free and confidential/

    0808 801 0331
    10am-9pm Mon-Thu & 10am-6pm on Fridays.
    The Support Line is closed between 25 December 2018 and 1 January 2019. 
    It will reopen on Wednesday, 2 January 2019 at 10 am.
    If you are in crisis please contact Samaritans on 116123. 
    Scope
    Senior online community officer
  • thespicemanthespiceman Member Posts: 6,408 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @sasteem   Pleased to meet you. Thank you first for sharing. I am myself an abuse victim of my own Mothers beatings.

    You are not alone with any of the abuse you suffered. I had one time put my story  on the forum and got so much response from other members.

    In those days child abuse . This being the Sixties and Seventies no one knew. Even now find it hard to comprehend why the reasons.

    All I can say you become stronger.  Had to speak out and talk about it.

    The problems it has caused and how it has effected me. Was and have been an alcoholic plus drugs.

    Been clean twelve next year.  Mental issues and have certain trust issues with women. Who have certain characteristics l avoid.  Those domineering, bossy, controlling and lying.   All the same as my Mother.

    Time moves so quickly the scars will always be there but will heal. Main thing I have done is move away.

    Found my heart here as the community helps.

    Only have great admiration for you. Coming on to the forum to talk about your story. Also good to hear you are coping the best way you can.

    We talk about violence against women by men. Rarely talk about women being violent to wards men. Especially family members whom you are supposed to love, care and cherish.

    It needs to be said.  

    Thank you.

    If you ever want a friend to listen or chat I am always here.

    Take care.

    @thespiceman

    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
    Mental Health advice, guidance and information to all members
    Nutrition, Diet, Wellbeing, Addiction.
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  • sasteemsasteem Member Posts: 3 Listener
    thank you all for the  messages  one thing i did   i  did find about a friends 2 children   all what happened to me they had and she left them at the age of  10 qnd eleven  years old  i brought them up  as my own and i never informed social services and because what happened to me i understood what they was going through  they have   a good life now thy are adults we never saw thier mum again    in life  what ever the problem we must help each other  have faith in each other any one  ever needs to talk i will be there  for you    one thing Sasteem in my Language means health ironic now 
  • wittygal1996wittygal1996 Posts: 13 Member
    Thank you for sharing your story with us. I’m glad you are able to raise awareness of the true impact of abuse irregardless of the sex of the perpetrator. And you are right. I hope you have a good therapist who can help you cope through all of this. Kudos.  
  • sasteemsasteem Member Posts: 3 Listener
    Hi yajh   
     the abuser  might have given the disability but  i decidd years ago you can either go up or go down i decided down i found out recently my sister is older than me and lives at the other end of the country oy dear mother arranged for her as a child to be raped and she kept this since  in her head sincw was 10 and my brother had the same abuse as i did  he is 11 years younger if i had known i would have took him in  to live with me .. my Therapist is my wife she has been brilliant   the only thing for me is  i hate christmas   take care 

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