Need some support, no family and friends to help now — Scope | Disability forum
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Need some support, no family and friends to help now

clairf Member Posts: 2 Listener
 hi everyone I'm new here and hoping someone might have some advice that could help. Sorry for the long story just want to give a clear picture, it could be longer I'm just highlighting lol. 
I'm a mum of 4 ages 13, 12, 9 and 3 my 12 year old has ASD, ADD, dyslexia, mearselin and challenging behaviour. My 9 year old is also waiting assessment as we are experience extremely challenging behaviour also which I have been expressing concerns for the last 3 years to health professionals and my sons disability social worker. All three boys have dyslexia and mearserlin My 3 year old daughter has a list of allergies and eczema which caused big sleep problems which have resulted in a horrible sleep pattern.
I coped for years by myself with my three boys as a single mum. My parents and sister would help out babysitting to give me a break to go to karate or when I started dating again and social work had a carer in place for my son once a week for 3 hours and my oldest had a befriended who took him out for a couple hours once a fortnight for a few years. Once I met my new partner my family support slowed down after I had my daughter and is now non existent which puts a major strain on my relationship with my partner not to mention my mental health.

I myself have suffered with depression on and off since I was 17. I'm now 34 so half of my life. I have also just very recently discovered that my anxiety that I noticed after I had my daughter 3 years ago is actually social anxiety I have actually had since I was a child and just not realised, thought it was normal to think like me, apparently it's not. 
My sons social worker arranged for babysitters once a month for 4 hours which my previous CPN said was not enough and that was when my parents were still taking the kids one night a month. I don't even have that any more. 
The boys don't have contact with their biological dad or anybody from his side and have no wish too and my partners parents aren't able to help either as he is their carer. 
My depression this time is not shifting at all like the other times. I have body imaging issues is all I know how to describe it without going into it too much. After having my daughter. Issues I can't fix myself and I think that's what's making it harder to get over this time and also why my anxiety is thro the roof. Especially when I am caring for my sons and all the appointments for them, myself and my parter I have to juggle.

Does anybody know if what I am getting would be described as being the appropriate amount of help. Cause I have absolutely no help anymore from family and no friends I could ask. 

Thanks in advance for any help or advice anyone might have.


  • steve51
    steve51 Member Posts: 7,153 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @clairf

    Welcome it’s great to meet you today ??

    I’m one off the Community Champion’s.

    Here’s some info for you below I do hope that you will find it helpful????

  • clairf
    clairf Member Posts: 2 Listener
    Thanks so much I'll take a. Look at that now
  • Beverley_Scope
    Beverley_Scope Scope Navigate service Posts: 84 Pioneering
    Hi @clairf

    I notice that you have not been on the site since January, so I hope that you see this post.

    Scope are now running a new service called Navigate which could provide you with some support.

    Navigate provides a six week programme of online and telephone support to parents who have a child going through diagnosis, or who have a child who has recently been diagnosed with a disability.  The aim is to provide parents with emotional and practical support that will help them build resilience as they start their journey as a parent of a child with a disability or impairment.
    If you feel this would beneficial to you, the link below will guide you to the online referral form.

    Our phone lines are also open from 9am - 8pm Monday to Friday and 9am - 12pm on a Saturday.

    The number is 0808 801 0510

    It sounds like you have really been struggling, so I hope that we can help you.

    Beverley Davies
    Parent Advisor


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