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Positives I have done for mh

ScoliFibroGirl Member Posts: 54 Courageous
Hey all

Here are the positives I have done for my mental health and well-being..

1. I have stopped turning up to groups in the local communities, they were making my depression worse and I was feeling more depressed turning up then I did when I stayed at home.

2. Realised that I am introvert and I actually prefer a quiet life, I don’t have desire for friends anymore, socialising or turning up to activities..  so I naturally prefer a quiet life with chatrooms, forums for company and lots of penfriends..  I don’t sit and dwell thinking “I have no friends”  or turn up to places where I feel worse.. I prefer meaningful contact with one friend once month.. that’s enough social engagement for me.

3. I installed hold on phone, it’s really helps when you are working on an online project, working from home, studying. I simply installed the app and hold my phone. It beeps when you are using it and stops the cycle, you have logs when you have hold your phone and earn points

4. I listen to a lot of music, YouTube and find it so soothing, smuts me to listen to music in my home either on earbuds or with my speaker. I even put on the radio on daily basis..

5. Switched off my telly,  the telly can be very unproductive at times and can be very addictive next thing I knew i was watching bargain hun, pointless and quoting the script.  So, I turned it off, I watch it if it’s something on I want to watch in the evening, Netflix but generally don’t bother.

6. Having plans for other universities, I am going back to university this year and this time I am not going to let last years bad situation with UCC affect me so I am gonna have plans and I have accepted that I may have to consider distance learning even through I have had terrible experiences of it before but I am now at stage where I am indoorsy person and I am not seeking friendships..

7.. making lots of alterations to my life so I can study, follow focus on material so I don’t get bored.  Really organised my laptop, iPhone and iPad so I can fully study.. 

8.  Moved all of my groups on messenger to another account. when I first started using whatsapp, messenger etc I had lots of groups and found it overwhelming too many chat rooms.. etc so I moved them on to another account and it’s made life easier.

9. Signed off from ”jobseeking” in years to come I will be thinking more about looking for work but now I have got to focus on coping with the illnesses and conditions I have.  Fibromylagia, Scolosis, TMJ and MH.  I
will focus on getting a job when my pain remains at 2-4 on the pain scale and when I don’t  need codeine, high levels of pregabz etc and when it doesn’t affect every day life. 

10. I am quitting sugar, once the chocolates are finished I am quitting sugar and I am starting to walk more.


  • EmmaB
    EmmaB Member Posts: 263 Pioneering
    edited June 2019
    Hi @ScoliFibroGirl
    It sounds like you have been working hard at identifying what works and doesn't work for you, and it's great you have written it down so you can refer to it in moments of self doubt? 
    There is a lot of support for disabled students at university now (I used to work at a university wellbeing service) so you can tap into that if you need to, they want people to stick with their course and succeed!
    The counsellor part of me thought it was interesting that your user name is your conditions and wondered whether there might be other ways in which you might define yourself to fit in with your brilliant list for your future?
    Best wishes.
  • angel56
    angel56 Member Posts: 4 Listener
    I really admire you for identifying and getting this list together.you sound so like me!x
  • Antonia_Alumni
    Antonia_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 1,781 Pioneering
    edited June 2019
    Hi @ScoliFibroGirl how are you doing today?

    Thank you for sharing this with us. I am glad to see you have a clear vision on what is best for you and your mental wellbieng. We have some information on our work and careers page. You may also find these blogs useful on university advice/tips, balancing university and chronic illness and accessible employment.

    Best wishes,
  • ScoliFibroGirl
    ScoliFibroGirl Member Posts: 54 Courageous
    On non disability forums I have different identities  BuJoLove 
    WildMusicAddict, Sk1n1m1n  
    hundreds of combinations.. in just at stage of my life where I am not focusing on short term faddy cures or even thinking about there being a cure for these conditions.  As to me it’s completely ridiculous, curable conditions are short term only (last few days, a week, a couple of months etc and are very straight forward.. 
  • EmmaB
    EmmaB Member Posts: 263 Pioneering
    Some people do recover from fibromyalgia and from mental health conditions @ScoliFibroGirl; I'm not saying it's easy and it can take time, sometimes years, for some people [depends on quite a few factors - what happened to them, what support they have, what they've been told, motivation to change etc] so please don't think you are landed with these conditions forever as that's not necessarily the case!  You certainly seem motivated to move your life forward in a positive way and I wish you all the very best with that - what are you going to study at Uni?  Exciting!

  • ScoliFibroGirl
    ScoliFibroGirl Member Posts: 54 Courageous
    I have already had fibromyalgia two years and the mh well over 8+ years I have been through endless therapies, gone to groups, turned up to lots of activities of enjoyment, taken meds and done endless stuff.. nothing has helped.. even changed my situation, had jobs, had friends and nothing has really helped. So I have lost hope, getting better is for broken legs 
  • EmmaB
    EmmaB Member Posts: 263 Pioneering
    That's a shame you have lost hope in getting better...  Given that fibromyalgia [and mental distress generally] often occurs after some sort of trauma/significant life event I wonder, if that is the case in your case, whether you'd ever been offered specialist counselling eg EMDR, Somatic Therapy as these are more appropriate in such circumstances.  GPs, and even psychiatrists, don't seem to offer this sort of specialist therapy mainly because some of them either don't believe it in [preferring to adopt the faulty brain myth] or because they are not aware of it.  Just a possible option if you've not come across it before...
  • ScoliFibroGirl
    ScoliFibroGirl Member Posts: 54 Courageous
    No they are trying to keep the two conditions separate and I am also trying separate the mh side of things from the problems of life of that makes sense. 

    infeel that’s with fibromyalgia it has own share of issues with it for example coping day to day, living with it, long term implications how it’s gonna affect future jobs and distress from it. 

    With jobseeking there there was no distress so therefore not an issue.. if ai am honest that will wait till physically in better place and mentally..  with jobseeking I only felt bored fed up nothing that would cause me to oversleep under sleep I get so worried thinking  about it. it  was just a bit sad, bored a bit fed up..  I was glad when I got permanently transferred to ESA  as finally I wasn’t classified as well enough..

    and the issues surrounding looking for friends eventually they can worried about or thought perhaps 5/10 thousand years time maybe as they don’t bother me whatsoever never have done.. introversion if my new way of life, quiet life by mistake me me myself and I. Years of being messed around has made me wanna consider a quiet life myself.. 
  • April2018mom
    April2018mom Posts: 2,868 Connected
    What therapies have you tried? 
  • ScoliFibroGirl
    ScoliFibroGirl Member Posts: 54 Courageous
    Cognitive behavioural therapy 
    anxiety workshop 101 six week course
    webeing and feeling great 6 week course 
    - I am still waiting to see Psychologist, been waiting ages. I really don’t hold my breath 
  • ScoliFibroGirl
    ScoliFibroGirl Member Posts: 54 Courageous
    And I am not bothered about recovering anyway, I am actually relieved in way although I hate having  scolosis and the pain is awful and pain from the fibromyalgia is awful too. Im a stage now when I can these are parts of me now, and depression mental side is mainly due having fibromylagia that is long term chronic incurable.
    so now I focus on coping with it day to day, week to week, I don’t bother thinking about what I am gonna do in years time or a months time as I just don’t know. I take the pills as prescribed, I do the recommended stuff every day to keep it a tolerable level. If I am like dark place with it or mentally, I see help if required.
    but mostly importantly I bunk groups. I stopped turning up to to them ages ago as I felt they were actually making things worse for me, I was going and they were talking a load nonsense mindless **** with no real meaning to it.... mainly about hot weather, paying 5p for carrier bag or moans and grumbles the buses.... not exactly what I had in mind... I was hoping chats about Netflix, chats about the latest soap storylines on telly, discussions on what’s happening in their life or their plans for the next week, their kids school life. For example : John’s kid is going to St Smiths School for the 6th form and wants to study Law, his exams went really well, Jane’s daughter is studying Medicine and in third year. 
    But no I got weather, bus passes, the same conversations, no real emotion or feelings.... boring. So I legged from the groups in town and actually I feel awesome, I have lots of hobbies to do at home that I do every day if possible. I have started my distance learning stuff that I love and things are okay with it.. I’m still undecided if I am going to stay with distance learning for psychology or if I am stay the uni physically because I don’t know with the whole mental health side and also the practicalities of living with scoliosis and fibromyalgia  it can be extremely tiring even when you everything right by the book, 
    and it’s very unpredictable at times so I mainly do not know how I am gonna be from morning to night day to day, if it’d going to affect using my laptop or writing with pen or if my speech is going to difficult with the TMJ... which could put Siri/dragon software out the question, how the hell am I gonna get this stuff regardless? 
  • ScoliFibroGirl
    ScoliFibroGirl Member Posts: 54 Courageous
    I've given up pretending to be someone else now which is how i felt with the i was saying i was well, now i am more honest about how i am really feeling


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