Tips for overcoming shyness when it comes to dating & relationships

csno01

Hi Everyone,

I was just wondering if anyone had any tips or resources which I could perhaps try when it came to overcoming shyness when meeting new people and forming relationships. I also suffer from social anxiety as well. 

Thanks
CSno1

humble_rumble

Hi CSno1,

I also have some shyness when it comes to meeting new people. One thing that has helped me is just throwing my self into the situation and not looking at how i might look in front of others or in their eyes.

Remember that whenever you meet a new person they are also as reserved as you might be at the beginning so try to find some comforting topic to discuss to get you more confident while talking.  Also don't forget to smile, a smile breaks barriers between people plus gives you more confidence. 

So in all i would say keep trying you might fail once or twice but you will get better at it and this shyness will quickly turn to overwhelming confidence and radiance. 

Good luck!

humble_rumble 

Adrian_Scope

Hi @csno01,

As humble_rumble said, finding that comforting topic can be a great way to get past that initial hurdle. This is probably made easier by being involved in an activity or hobby. It puts the focus on something else and also gives you something to fall back on as a topic.

Mental Health Mates organise meet-ups for people with mental health conditions to get together and talk while walking. This might be a good first step for you to meet new people in a safe environment.

csno01

Thank you for the recommendations guys. I will bear them in mind. 

Csno1

csno01

Thank you for the recommendations guys. I will bear them in mind. 

Csno1

April2018mom

These are my top tips 

Make small talk at parties. Find social activities. If you live in Surrey I would contact the Mary Frances Trust. Or telephone your local council to see what is on offer. Find a common topic about a shared mutual interest or hobby or skill too.
Take it from there. What is your hobby? Do you enjoy gardening or not? Are you a gym member? Focus on your strengths. Sign up for a activity or club for disabled folks as well. Your local library should have information on learning opportunities within the area. Research what’s on offer locally. 
Have a look at the council website. Start a conversation with someone at the gym. See what options do exist for finding a job. Look at organisations that can offer help. If you are at a party smile. Make eye contact. Say hello. Be friendly. Ask questions. 
Are there any courses you could enrol upon or not? Ask to see if your local college can help you study something. Check on their website or give them a call. Or email them instead. Be brave. 

csno01

April2018mom said:

These are my top tips 

Make small talk at parties. Find social activities. If you live in Surrey I would contact the Mary Frances Trust. Or telephone your local council to see what is on offer. Find a common topic about a shared mutual interest or hobby or skill too.
Take it from there. What is your hobby? Do you enjoy gardening or not? Are you a gym member? Focus on your strengths. Sign up for a activity or club for disabled folks as well. Your local library should have information on learning opportunities within the area. Research what’s on offer locally. 
Have a look at the council website. Start a conversation with someone at the gym. See what options do exist for finding a job. Look at organisations that can offer help. If you are at a party smile. Make eye contact. Say hello. Be friendly. Ask questions. 
Are there any courses you could enrol upon or not? Ask to see if your local college can help you study something. Check on their website or give them a call. Or email them instead. Be brave. 

Hi April,

I have been delving into things and here are my findings so far since your post: 

I went to a friends 40th birthday party yesterday.  my friend is in to Raving and DJs, this isn’t my music at all but I really enjoyed it. Surprisingly I knew some of the people there. 

In terms of socializing I am using the Meetup platform and I’m slowly attending events although I will say it is hard meeting new people, although Moreso making new friends. Particularly when you have a disability.

My hobbies are mainly music focused.  I play drums and percussion. Groups for this might be worth looking into. I also enjoy walking and jogging and I’m looking at joining a group to participate in either of these activities at present. 

I appreciate things take time and effort the main thing is to be patient which something i’ve learned to understand over a very long time. Who doesn’t have patience ha ha. 

Csno1