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Having a carer

Hello
I'm new to the forum but feeling brave so thought I would ask a question. I wondered if anyone would share their experience with me.
I have a disability because I became ill. I found it quite difficult to accept the disability and while I have worked through most of it and received the help I require I have been struggling the idea of having a carer. Is there anyone else that feels like this?
I can sometimes take care of myself in terms of personal care but this means I use all my energy and mobility for this and then crash and make my symptoms worse. There is also a lot I can't do. I have realised that my current way of doing things means that I am not living and it is making my situation and health more difficult.
Given my new insight, I thought I would ask if people could share their experiences. I'm not sure what I want to know really. I feel mortified at the thought of someone helping me bathe. How did others feel or deal with having a carer?
And I know this is strange but what do they do...I mean, I know what tasks they do but what happens? Does that even make sense?
If you got this far, thank you for reading.
J
Replies
In the cases where I have been involved in support with personal care, I can assure you that carers are supposed to do everything to help you feel comfortable. This should take place after a care plan has been agreed so you are in control. I considered it a privilege to be allowed to help some folks with personal care. People soon let you know if you are doing the wrong thing usually and if you enjoy your job and are doing it correctly then you are rewarded with job satisfaction and good relationships with those you are assisting.
That said, me having s carer? Well that’s a whole different ball game. It’s hard for me to comprehend that idea at this point in time but I know that’s me being stubborn. I don’t need one for personal care right now but I could do with one for travelling. I’m just not there yet.
It is a minefield and there are many care agencies out there now.
You should look into it thoroughly in your area and find out what’s on offer if you can,
good luck 💕
He was very against getting outsiders in, but saw reality eventually.
So what do my ladies do and how do I feel about it?
I am paraplegic with useless bladder and bowels....so I have a supra pubic catheter and unpredictable bowel movements. These are my idea of the worst bits about my disability. My carers deal with whatever happens and I dont feel embarrassed now.
The first thing you need is an assessment from Social Services. Even if you decide against their findings in some or all of their ideas, it will help you understand what is available and what is a very `normal` way of living for many disabled people like me!
Once you`ve had the assessment, you can think about how much input you need from a carer(s).
I got a recommendation from a wheelie person I knew and shared her carer. That lady has been with me for over 8 years now. She initially came for 3 hours a week. Now she does 22 hours and 2 sleepovers. Hubby and I love her and treat her like family.
My other carer does 6 hours a week, plus cover for when the other one is not working. Both ladies take me on holidays, to give my hubby a break.
You could use agencies, but they come at a high price, so that needs consideration. Direct Payments pays for all my care. You have to be means tested for that.
I firmly believe carers have made a massive positive difference to my life and urge you to find out more. Can I help with any other questions?
Best wishes xxx
I can understand your hesitations around this, especially if you have been knocked back before.
I would advise referring yourself, even if it is to gauge what you ore entitled to.
Also, thank you for your great support on the community today, it's greatly appreciated
Scope
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I could literally write a article on this topic. We have discussed respite care for my son. He is a paraplegic with serious bladder issues. I have talked to people and researched my options. For now I am inclined not to apply but may reconsider things in the future if our circumstances change.
Scope
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getting out of bed
washing/showering
dressing
cooking
cleaning
outdoor activities
holidays (I get a respite fund)
All these things can be done more safely and in a better timely fashion, with the help of a carer.
Can I offer any further help?
xxx
These are the common tasks:
Shopping
Cooking
Filling out forms
Cleaning/ironing
Vacations
Medication
Gym/maintaining fitness
Dressing
Research care companies online. Remember there are also equipment and aids that replace carers too. We use my son’s DLA money to pay for adaptive equipment that helps him remain independent.
Scope
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Complete our feedback form to help us to improve your community.
I hope this helps
Scope
Tell us what you think?
Complete our feedback form to help us to improve your community.
Scope
Tell us what you think?
Complete our feedback form to help us to improve your community.
I hope that helps.
Scope
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