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Not depressed enough!

chris74 Community member Posts: 11 Connected
Hi all

I could do with some guidance please.

I suffer from depression, and have tried to take my own life, and still think about this often.

I suffer from PTSD, I was injured and made disabled in the Armed forces, I was abused as child, I am autistic and have other personal problems, all of which, at times, is far to mach for me to take.

After watching a program regarding mental health in men, and speaking with professionals, I was told to get help, and my first step was to speak with my GP.

Last week I had an appointment with my GP who told me I wasnt depressed enough for medication,  and although she will refer me to the Mental Health department, she said she thinks I was attention seeking and wasting the NHS time. 

I was then called by an assessor who was more concerned about me hurting my wife or daughter. This hurt me so much as I have never hurt my family, and it is only for them why I am still alive today. I am a good husband and father, and to be told that due to my serving in the armed forces, and that I have attempted suicide,  I am a risk to my wife and child.

I have suffered from depression all my life, and it is so hard to live with, and finally gain the currouage to ask for help and this is what I get. Why doesn't anyone take mens mental health seriously?

I now feel worse for even asking for help.


  • missy12345
    missy12345 Community member Posts: 28 Connected

    Sorry to to hear what your going through but I can honestly say I can completely understand as I’m suffering from depression and anxiety and I can’t even leave my house or go out in the public transport as I get that anxious I vomit, I also have tried to take my own life but I do think you should be on some sort of medication tho so I’d keep going to see your gp about that until they do listen. 
  • Adrian_Scope
    Adrian_Scope Posts: 11,102 Scope online community team
    Really sorry to read about your experience @chris74. I'm very disappointed to hear how dismissive your GP sounds about your concerns, especially after the effort I'm sure it took to even go there and talk about them at all. Male mental health isn't taken seriously enough, but there are organisations like CALM out there who might be able to suggest something. I'd also go back and see if you can speak to a different GP. Over the years I've learned it really can depend on who you get on the day.
    Hopefully the referral will come good for you and you'll get some support that way too.
    Community Manager
  • EmmaB
    EmmaB Community member Posts: 263 Pioneering
    Hi @chris74
    It sounds like you have done an amazing job holding it all together having had a difficult childhood and then your experience of becoming disabled in the armed forces...
    But it sounds like you want to improve your lot but when you reached out your GP said you were attention seeking which feels like a very ignorant view to take given your experiences.
    Given your 
    background it's not surprising you've felt low mood for a long time and I would ask the mental health team you are referred to about specialist help for the trauma you have experienced - both the childhood abuse and your military experience, eg EMDR or somatic therapy which could both be potential avenues for you (medication helps some people but it doesn't fix the root cause and ideally shouldn't be used long term so be very wary of anyone only suggests this and get a second opinion...). 
    I really hope you can find some more decent support, unfortunately a lot of GPs don't understand about mental distress and prefer to dish out pills and send you on your way, but at least you do have an onwards referral and I hope they will give you some effective help.
    There are organisations that do specifically support men but it depends where you live...
    Best wishes.
  • chris74
    chris74 Community member Posts: 11 Connected
    Thank you Emma, very kind words. I hope someone along the line takes me seriously and can help.
  • thespiceman
    thespiceman Community member Posts: 6,388 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @chris74   Pleased to meet you .

    Sorry what you are going through. Sorry to hear about what your Doctor says. Sometimes they are causing more problems.

    You entitled to good mental health and wellbeing.

    Some of the community members  have given excellent guidance and advice and some links.

    I have mental health issues my self.

    Used this charity last time.


    All I can say you can self refer.  No need for a Doctor.

    Get floating outreach support  workers  with your mental health and wellbeing.

    Worth checking out.  Might not be in all areas.

    If there anything I can help with please get in touch.

    You not alone.  Always here to talk to have a chat does help.

    Wish you well take care.


    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
    Mental Health advice, guidance and information to all members
    Nutrition, Diet, Wellbeing, Addiction.
  • Chloe_Scope
    Chloe_Scope Posts: 10,586 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @chris74, I'm really sorry you were ignored by your GP, you certainly are not wasting resources. Please do seek a second opinion if you are not happy with the referral. I appreciate how hard it can be to open up and I know that cannot have been easy at all.

    I hope the support works out and please be in touch if there is anything we can do to help. :)

  • newborn
    newborn Community member Posts: 832 Pioneering
    There are lots of organisations,  often well funded, and all specifically aimed at ex service people.  If you use that road, you get more  opportunities than the  general public.  

    Some are all -service, some are specific to the relevant forces branch.

    They  even have arrangements to cover any needs of  helping your lovely family, on the  grounds that service and ex service families might need support just as much as the personell themselves.
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