Struggle to be happy at all

kami24

I struggle socially because autism probably and also think people are talking about me also i live in a place where the people are very white middle class and pc so its clicky and i hate it as i am working class but its safer in this area so i don't have many other options. I don't see the point of things and have little reason to be happy mental illness, on benefits as not able to work, no friends, only my dad no other family. I just find it impossible to be happy and sometimes wonder why other people are

LaughingLolly

Hello @kami24 autism is hard. I am both physically disabled and with some level of autism and am also a carer for my teenage son with autism and I think the autism is harder to deal with than physical problems. One tip I would give you is to think about getting involved with roles where you can volunteer. The reason this can be good is: 

• It gives you a reason to leave the house and get out which can open up other opportunities 
• It can give you a tremendous purpose in life 
• It can be flexible around your illness unlike paid work 
• It means you can be around people without initially having to be in deep conversation 

I would think about skills you have and things you enjoy and then maybe talk to your doctor or other support worker about your desire to vollunteer and some of the obstacles that it might also present. Perhaps try a number of different types first. 

Lorraine 

kami24

Thank you lorraine i will try to see about volunteering but don't want anything too full on

LaughingLolly

@ there are so many people looking for volunteers out there i am sure you will find something. Try to find something you will really love and a place where you will feel deeply appreciated. 

GailR

saz11

Very very true ?

saz11

@kami24

I hope you are feeling a bit better.

I too struggle to socialise and feel very uncomfortable around people.
I never used to be like this but lots of things changed in my life and gradually i isolated myself.

I unfortunately don't have family and live alone , i had to give up my career due to ill health but through time i have adjusted to the way my life has become and i am happy. 

I am not exactly young but neither am i old and i have not socialised for a long time. But over the last 6 months i have made a friend and while i am happy to chat and have a coffee with her i am not ready to go out and socialise.

Life is hard at times but keep strong.

I have seen some your post and you seem like a very helpful and caring person and everyone needs a friend like you and that's what you are to us all on the forum ?

kami24

Thankyou 

Chloe_Alumni

Hi @kami24, thank you sharing this with us. I think the suggestion of volunteering is great!

Scope have a range of volunteer options which you might find useful.

There is also Volunteer Matters which allows you to see the volunteering opportunities within your local area.

Please do let us know if we can help with anything else.

Jane1964

Hi I am Jane, 4 children. 28, 26, 24 and 22. I have bipolar and they don't understand it, so I don't see the . It breaks my heart and then I drink. Please help me

kami24

June so sad to hear this. Be strong. Kids at that age can be naiive and will understand when they are older. Concentrate on yourself and be a bit selfish as you looked after them when they were young. If you are feeling very depressed please ring samaritans  https://www.samaritans.org

116   113.  Free call

kami24

Sorey 123 not 113

kami24

Sorry 116 123

kami24

https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/bipolar-disorder/useful-contacts/#.XWRFlbco9kw

saz11

@Jane1964

Hi Jane sorry to hear you are feeling like this. I am sure your children want to understand but maybe they are struggling because you are their mum and children normally see their parents as being indestructible. I know i did with my parents until i lost them both.

Have you tried talking to them altogether or individually? .

Or what about writing it all down for them that way you can be open and honest with them and explain how your illness is affecting you.

kami24

Maybe they have no clue of how it affects you daily and long term so maybe someone can inform and educate them about bipolar and the struggles it brings maybe on your behalf. 

April2018mom

Jane1964 said:

Hi I am Jane, 4 children. 28, 26, 24 and 22. I have bipolar and they don't understand it, so I don't see the . It breaks my heart and then I drink. Please help me

Have you seen a therapist or counseller? They can make a difference- ask your GP to refer you. Be honest and answer questions. Have a go at keeping a diary too. It can also help. Ask about effective mental health therapies worth trying as well often you will see good results once you have completed the programme. Best of luck! Keep us updated. Also here are some tips to reduce drinking- https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/alcohol-support/tips-on-cutting-down-alcohol/

Chloe_Alumni

Hi @Jane1964 and a very warm welcome to the community!

Thank you for sharing this with us and I'm sorry your children don't understand. Have you been able to have a conversation with them about how it does affect you? I understand how difficult this can be.

Adrian_Scope

Really sorry to read this @Jane1964. I think, as others have suggested, it's really important for you to sit down and explain to them as simply as possible.

How are you doing today?

Ails

Good luck with finding a volunteering role @kami24 and thanks for sharing with us.  Please let us know how you get on.  

Hi @Jane1964 and welcome to the Community.  It is nice to meet you.  I'm so sorry to hear of your struggles and I hope things improve for you soon.  We are all here to support you on the Community so please reach out to us if you need to and let us know if there is anything we can do for you.  All the best.