Having been taught to 'deal with it', 'suck it up' etc, even now I still find it hard to say i'm struggling - but I really genuinely am. It's just one of those days, nights, weeks that I can't find any way up or even want to. I'm on a lot of veterans groups but there is so much going on between them, I just don't trust where to post, although I know they will try to help. If I skip the bad bits and just go back to Fri, my ot had just been out (she was covering for my cpn who was going to have to cancel), she had just gone and I checked my mail. I had a letter from dwp stating I had a f2f home assessment on 01 Nov. The last one I had to go to actually broke me, even though I had someone there. Coupled with how I feel at the mo and what happened previously, i'm really, I don't know....... well I do but obviously can't say on here 😕. I'm just so tired of everything being such a fight 😢😢😢. People say it gets better, but when? Even my fight is about done, it's just getting at every corner. I'm sorry for long pathetic post, I really don't do 'feeling sorry for myself' posts but it feels like the 'gunfight at the ok corral'.