Disabled people
If this is your first visit, check out the community guide. You will have to Join us or Sign in before you can post.

There is nothing wrong with me.

crackercracker Member Posts: 324 Pioneering
I find myself angry with myself for not being able to be the person before the accidents. I broke spine, tail bone a hip and ribs. Also had cancer and am severely immobile and easily fatigued.

I tell myself these are just temporary and am angry because I cannot go back. But doctors say is nothing be done..I will only worsen with time
You are so wise here. Can you help me

Thanks and special greetings
Crackers

Replies

  • paffuto10paffuto10 Member Posts: 388 Pioneering
    @cracker

    Don't know about wise but I can certainly relate to feeling angry at not being able to go back to the way I was! 

    Sorry to hear about your accident and having cancer. 
    I'm a cancer survivor too and the radiation has caused damage and illnesses.

    On bad days I remind myself I am lucky to be here thanks to surgery and radiotherapy. 

    I think the best advice I could give is to try and just take one day at a time. 

    I do understand though, it is difficult to accept. 
  • MisscleoMisscleo Member Posts: 646 Pioneering
    I too know what it's like to live in the past when I walked the Grand Canyon. 
    Loads if tears shed on my poor cat who is often ringing wet.
    Im in so much pain i cant turn my taps on or off.
    Can't get up stairs without making a load of noise trying to get air in my lungs.
    I spend as much time at hospital as at home. And NO there is NO answer and there is NO light at the end of the tunnel.
    I find my cat who keeps telling me my legs are dying (he can smell they are rotting) yet he gives me undying love. And I have outdoor cats who also give me head bumps."
    Music is a great help cant dance anymore but "chair dancing" is ok.
    There's a few of us in this same boat of no future.
    Music and pets thats my answer

  • yingtongyingtong Member Posts: 37 Pioneering
    I have similar problems to you with different causes,I used to look back and get very upset with myself as I was a very active person,but I took a simple saying on board and that is you can’t change the past,but you can certainly change the future.I put all my efforts into improving my future and I am a much happier person and I have improved my life.I wish you all the best for the future because you certainly have one!
  • pollyanna1052pollyanna1052 Member Posts: 1,999 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi, I`m another disabled person who longs for a cure but will never get one.

    I`ve been disabled 20 years and did cope better with the fact that things wont get better, until a year or two ago. I feel more angry with myself than I used to.

    But aren't we all wasting a lot of time and mental energy wishing for something that can never be?

    It doesn't help that we have continually prove our case for such as ESA and PIP?

    I`m sorry we haven't been more helpful, but we know how you feel.

    Soon be Christmas!
  • pcoventrypcoventry Member Posts: 149 Pioneering
    edited November 2019
    I know how you all feel - Yes it's frustrating especially when the so called DA gets it totally wrong, lies or just misses bits off. 
  • paffuto10paffuto10 Member Posts: 388 Pioneering
    @Misscleo

    Walked the Grand Canyon?  WOW!!!!  :)

    Yes I know just what you all mean.

    Some days (especially warm sunny days) I do get a bit fed up and hark back to the days when I used to cycle or take long walks. 

    I think @yingtong has the right outlook, making efforts to improve the future. 
    I'm going to try but it certainly takes a big effort! 
  • crackercracker Member Posts: 324 Pioneering
    Many thanks to everyyone. I am sorry for all the suffering the pain and loss of physical health. I feel less alone now. No one without our experience can understand.

    You are right:  dwelling on what I cannot do is a we are of time and energy.  It just leaves me in despair.
    I will keep your words in mind a d work on a furniture not on an empty past.

    Everyone take it good care.

    Cracker







  • paffuto10paffuto10 Member Posts: 388 Pioneering
    You take care too @cracker

    Hope you sleep well  :)
  • Chloe_ScopeChloe_Scope Scope Posts: 10,680 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @cracker, I can understand your frustrations, and the longing for things to go back to how they were.

    How are you doing today?
    Community Partner
    Scope

    Tell us what you think?
    Complete our feedback form to help us to improve your community.
  • April2018momApril2018mom Member - under moderation Posts: 2,882 Member - under moderation
    This reminds me of another thread do you embrace your impairment by @Connie00

    When my son was a baby I cried at night. I hated leaving him in the hospital every night. I was a hormonal post partum mom. So I got a notebook diary six weeks after diagnosis day but it was of not much use until he was born. I recorded my feelings each week in it. I do accept his limitations whilst gently pushing him. Today he tried out tubing for the first time. I did it with him.

    Life is for living, not standing still always. I look to the future. I never really accepted his delays. He is only really delayed in one area of his development, but no I don’t see him as delayed. 


Sign in or join us to comment.