Dating and relationships
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ASD and Dating

connoro007connoro007 Member Posts: 24 Courageous
edited March 2020 in Dating and relationships
Can anyone give me any advice on dating and relationships when they have autism? I’ve been dating a girl but it seemed to go the way it always go, I tend to develop strong feelings far too quickly then get the classic “let’s be friends”. It’s better than them just disappearing I suppose. The whole dating thing has always made me feel uncomfortable as I don’t particularly do well in crowds/resteraunts/clubs etc. Just hoping someone can give me some advice on meeting someone nice. I’ve been single for almost 4 years, I’ve seen the statistics of people on the spectrum regarding loneliness/relationships and the likes and it’s really hard to maintain faith that I’ll actually find someone. It’s weird because I feel like I’m a really decent person, honest, caring, nice etc yet feeling alone is a common theme. Most of the time I enjoy the solitude but not having someone to do enjoyable things with, talk to and just have fun really hurts 


  • MegkMegk Member Posts: 4 Listener
    Don't worry about it. Work on being friends first.
  • Richard_ScopeRichard_Scope Posts: 2,837

    Scope community team

    Hi @connoro007, dating is difficult at the best of times, not to mention unpredictable! 
    @Megk has given great advice and it is something I have used my self as a disabled man. Focus on building a strong friendship is key because:
    1. It allows you to get to know them really well
    2. They can learn about our differences

    Here is some more specific information from Ambitious About Autism

    Please try not to give up!
    Specialist Information Officer - Cerebral Palsy

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  • Adrian_ScopeAdrian_Scope Testing team Posts: 7,999

    Scope community team

    Hi @connoro007. Have you tried much online dating? I know Richard's linked you to Ambitious About Autism, but I thought I'd chip in as well. I've always struggled in crowded places, such as the pubs, clubs and restaurants you've mentioned and I'm not the best at communicating verbally either. So online dating, or meeting people online through mutual interests has been a godsend for me in terms of making better and longer-lasting connections. 
    As is the key with these things – take things slowly and try not to go into anything with any expectations. Enjoy things as they are and if something else happens, then great! :smile:
    Community Manager
  • connoro007connoro007 Member Posts: 24 Courageous
    Thank you for these comments guys.
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