Disabled people
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where to rant?

justjudithjustjudith Member Posts: 9 Listener
Hi. This might be the wrong place so sorry in advance.

Since the year dot I've had …… mental health? issues - and over the years I've been treated as disposable by some professionals. Not being "sexy" or "trendy". So suck it up buttercup.

As a result of having taken meds for decades I now have a movement disorder. For months (18?) I've been struggling with this and life - and asked for help. No help. I got a neurologist appointment last Monday - over the phone. Whenever I say I'm struggling this last few days people assume its to dio with COVID. I was told by the neurologist she would e-mail gp.  When I phoned surgery on Friday I was told wait...… and didn't seem to care if I ever had the tablets she wants me to have. The movements have been worse this last few weeks and they do my head in.

Me and self care aren't great! Food shopping is usually done online. I work! As an online grocery picker - work is busy! And hours long - and buses are less frequent. But I cannot get online shopping. From none of the major supermarkets. I went into town to go to a supermarket - and I saw the queue. It would have been a long wait and I have a hard time actualy doing more in a supermarket than grabbing a couple of items and then getting out as soon as possible. I went to an Express - but...… 

I'm not asking for charity. I'm just wanting to say its naff.  But little weird stupid lass ought to smile and not get upset and distressed. Life is unicorns and rainbows!

I'm not wanted. Sometimes it sucks. But as long as the cat doesn't get hurt!

Thanks

Judith

Replies

  • thespicemanthespiceman Member Posts: 6,408 Disability Gamechanger
    Hello @justjudith    Pleased to meet you.

    Thank you for joining and sharing.

    Sorry what you have been through.  This is not your fault never blame yourself.

    Please this what we are here for to listen be supportive help guide offer friendship.

    I know the whole system is in melt down having so many problems.

    In the mental health services and it is due to lack of funding over burden of clientele and staff resources.

    Every one is entitled to good mental health and care.

    Use these three if this helps you.

    https://www.richmondfellowship.org.uk

    https://www.mind.org.uk

    https://www.rethink.org

    All offer floating support welfare health and anything you have a problem or issue with.

    The last charity is an advocate charity represents speak on your behalf if having difficulties with medical professionals.

    Sorry to hear getting food a problem how can I help with anything.

    I need to thank you for helping every one in the community great work and appreciation from me and I sure the community says the same.

    Please may I add if you having difficulty accessing food groceries which I very much is a concern.

    Maybe your Managers need to be taken in to consideration the difficulties your having.

    Speak to them need to know.

    Use your Union should be entitled to go around to shop where you work.

    Mentioned your condition please may I suggest there are organisations, charities, associations connected .

    If you so wish to contact me see how I can help your further.

    Pleasure to do so.

    I know can feel the pain and to reassure you we are here every day always some one to talk to chat to.

    Anytime, if not tag my username.

    Please take care keep  safe and please keep in touch.

    You are a valued respected member of community and you deserve support to get through the struggles.

    Please have a look at the links I added.

    Any questions ask me.

    @thespiceman








    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
    Mental Health advice, guidance and information to all members
    Nutrition, Diet, Wellbeing, Addiction.
    Recipes
  • justjudithjustjudith Member Posts: 9 Listener
    Hi.  Thanks.

    I know I'm being out of order!

    I work not in a public store but an online grocery site. So no staff can access anything on the "shop floor"  So.…. Suck it up buttercup.

    I fdon't want favours. I struggle at times -  in Jan I had the start of a financial crisis. And CAB said about asking for needs assessment as well as StepChange.  Needs Assessment was basically saying not us babe.  And community navigator basically was saying sometime never we'll see you. months ago I thought, I wanted to get clothes - needed clothes - so might "buy" a support worker to go shopping with me. If I look online all they show are jobs in that field. When this year I asked Social Services for help in where to privately get a support worker - they didn't want to know.  You see I do get DLA and I ain't afraid to use it! Yes, to get help. I know health services etc., are stretched. 

    The movement disorder I struggle with.  But its my own fault. I'm angry with myself. I'm not allowed to be angry with anyone else.  I did the best I could kand it weren't good enough. 

    But smile and say nowt. Mental health has given up on me. The local mind basically at best work office hours and do groups - 6 weeks of art or whatever. So if you work then..... but. I work cos I need money to live and I was always told never to say I have issues/problems/illness/condition.  Years ago there was a book with the title "scream quietly or the neighbours will hear" - story of our lives?

    Yes, I'm angry at myself.  I have "respect" for professionals etc., but when its basically don't say anything apart to professionals - don't say to anyone your upset, hurting or whatever..... that I have a problem. I might not understand why someone at work is upset by something - but I still give her a hug and say I'm there - yes, maybe professional help - but anyone but me has a right to feel outside of professional encounters.

    I will smile, have breakfast and go to work.

    By the way - when I was young there were adult literacy schemes. I have a problem with figures.  I can do very basic stuff - but struggle - anyone know of where I could look?  My brother has dyslexia -   not to the same extent but my diffic ulties with figures are sort of parallel.

    Marmite sandwich anyone?

    Judith
  • thespicemanthespiceman Member Posts: 6,408 Disability Gamechanger
    edited April 2020
    Hello @justjudith   Thank you for your reply.

    Please thank you for sharing. Sorry to hear what you have been through.

    Please if I can explain you come on to this forum to ask for help and support that is what I do as Community Champion.

    My signature at the bottom of each post tells you.

    One or two issues need to clarify.

    First you not useless hopeless or any other words you may wish to describe yourself.

    I believe every one deserves a chance, good health and to cope with issues, problems move on the journey make new paths and opportunities.

    Mentioned not looking for favours what do you mean by this confused here.

    If that means asking for help support and advice information to maintain and cope.

    Do not see any problem.

    Asking and finding support to help your self Have to add here no one runs your life for you , even support workers and care systems do not do that.

    One if you wish to can have a private support worker but it your money.

    Then is the problem suppose the support worker tells you something you do like, are you going to sack them.

    I used to run a business had staff making comments general advice and information to make the business grow.

    If I had no listened be bust. Gone bankrupt.

    There is a lot of support workers out there who are good hard workers but this mainly in the charities.

    I never pay for a private one why waste money if you are not going to listen.

    One has to be thinking why you need a private support worker if you are not prepared to listen and learn educate yourself then goals aims can not  be happening.

    Please I was an angry person been through a lot myself but now realise angry people do not get what they want.

    No one likes an angry person I had a lot of the issues around my own health.

    Born with disability having addiction mental health used to say no a lot lost out . Had a abusive background and much more.

    Think of this OK MIND not for you have you checked out Richmond Fellowship .

    Bigger than MIND better and lots of in house advisors.  Support workers.

    Branches services and support  employment and  so on..

    I do understand have had so many times bad times with some charities services. 

    Used them Richmond Fellowship if there in your areas.

    Support groups most charities do this bit if your working should have said to you other options .

    I know a matter of choice but please look at Richmond Fellowship.

    Small insight in to how they work, contact them and discuss in agreement how they can help.

    In the interests of yourself one aspect of any mental health is acceptance.

    If they do tell you something have to be honest open and listen no listening means get rid of you and move on to next on clientele.

    Something you need to be all embracing.

    I was on the web last night looking for support groups for you.

    Because your condition am aware of and have been reading something I do.

    Because I feel every one needs a little reassurance some comfort.

    I have been walked over used by door mats services . Instead use charities.

    One other if you wish for help it will come and the words suck it up buttercup will not be hearing those words.

    Please may I add one final point or two please can you ask self what do you want.  Write it down and when seeing any mental health charity support .

    This is what I do need and require.  Clear precise and hand them the paper.

    Richmond Fellowship any charity will ask you what you want from them.

    Second relevant important point is they will suggest ideas and activities to help you deal with issues.

    If you not interested or not wish to know then again discharge you.

    Must add all services are business and costs over heads are high.

    Staff turnover of clientele is huge, my own support had numerous people daily weekly and time is a factor.

    I know this because often sent me texts early morning and late at night .

    I do think your being hard on yourself from reading the condition you have and the mental health combined .

    I do understand this as been an alcoholic for thirty years that is my drugs  as well effected me physically mentally.

    Clean thirteen years if I ever thought for a moment could do this on my own no I could not.

    Rehab and then the medications on now lasting effects lifetime of meds.

    Scars yo makes you think of the negative since being clean sorted positivity and harmony is something I need to do.

    I just want to let you know meet lots of members like yourself and can be achieved aimed do amazing things.

    My favourite saying as told to me by support worker.

    If you put a stone in your path do you go around or over or stop still do nothing.

    If I thought about that stopped still probably continued addiction and be dead by this time.

    I spent too long suffering.

    One needs to asking and saying what I need if you care to ask me how can I help you please do.

    I understand one important factor your a member of our community we can help to help yourself have a life give you the support you need to carry on.

    I am always here to talk and chat if you need anything any one to talk to please get in touch.

    Please take care and safe.

    @thespiceman  
    Community Champion
    SCOPE Volunteer Award Engaging Communities 2019
    Mental Health advice, guidance and information to all members
    Nutrition, Diet, Wellbeing, Addiction.
    Recipes
  • SeanchaiSeanchai Member Posts: 411 Pioneering
    edited April 2020
    Judith ...Never apologise for saying how you feel and never blame yourself for health problems ( physical or mental) .
    At times we can feel alone in this big world ...but there is always someone who will listen and give advice . 
    I am struggling myself ( mentally) just now but thankfully I have loving family and friends around me who are always willing to support me . They might not fully understand the mental side of things but they do try to understand .
    I can see that you feel let down and you are hurting due to the professionals not helping you as you need . 
    Professionals( doctors ect.)  are struggling to keep up with mental health problems ...or any other problem at the moment if it's not connected with the virus . I am now into my fifth week of isolation and it's starting to affect me now.....We worry about my family ( I have a 16 year old severly autistic grandson) Its hard to explain to him why he cannot go to school each day and why he cannot go out the door . That's a huge problem for his mum ( our daughter) to cope with .( he also has other health problems that put him on the danger list with this virus ) .
    Please do not blame yourself for any of your problems ..... I know it's hard to get appointments with professionals just now ( although it's never been easy in the past few years due to massive funding cut backs ) . Social services is overstretched as well , My grandson has never seen a social worker for over a year ....but then again ...they have never been good at keeping in touch . It was not until my grandson got a new social worker a few months ago that my daughter was told of all the various things she can get from social services ...but as expected , there is a huge waiting list ( even more so now ) .
     My son works in logistics management and we all thank you guys that are continuing to work through these frightening times ...it would be a lot harder if we did not have food . The NHS nurses and doctors and carers get our thanks as well ...but you are part of a giant cog wheel that is keeping the country going...thank you and your colleagues for doing so . 
    I believe the country ( the world) will change in many ways when we are all over this nightmare ....and I hope that people that need help will have it at hand and I also hope the workforce in the UK will be paid a decent wage .
    Please feel free to talk anytime , their are others in here with the same problems as you and I have ....never feel on your own 👍
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