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Life after Cancer treatment

caitswildecakecaitswildecake Member Posts: 5 Listener
Hello, I’m Caitlin and I’m 19. I was diagnosed with acute myeloid leukaemia back in 2018 and had a donor bone marrow transplant the same year. I had extremely intense treatment and I’m struggling to cope with the side effects and adjust to my new normal. I need the aid of a wheelchair, I’ve lost many friends since I don’t like drinking due to also being epileptic. I only get invited out if they can use me for my disability “privileges” like better seating at theatres, cheap or free football/concert tickets. I’m wondering if anyone else has felt like they’ve been exploited? I’m constantly told to be grateful for each day since my transplant didn’t reject but I’m struggling with the crippling side effects. I feel like I can’t complain otherwise I come across as bitter and selfish. I’ve felt like a burden when I tried going on nights out with my friends, traumatic things have happened and recently a friend said to me that I should forgive this other girl because she didn’t “break my f-king legs” when she actually left me alone in a club that I’d never been to before. When I did have cancer people constantly checked in on me, but once I rang that end of treatment bell the support just faded away. My journey has made me closer with certain family members, but I’ve lost friends as a result. I started seeing a psycho-oncologist to address my cancer related ptsd however I feel like I’m finally ready to make better friends who understand me and I can relate to. I’ve been reconsidering my education and I want to do psychology and potentially become a support worker for future teenage and young adult cancer patients. 

Replies

  • steve51steve51 Member Posts: 7,175 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @caitswildecake

    Good Evening & Welcome it’s great to meet you today.

    I am one of a team of Community Champion’s here at Scope.

    Yes I had similar problems after my Stroke in 1998 at the age off 32.

    All off my some what friends disappeared into the wilderness.

    Leaving me with only close family members.

    You will find this very common though.

    Please please let me know if you need any further help/support???

    @steve51
  • woodbinewoodbine Community Co-Production Group Posts: 3,824 Disability Gamechanger
    Same happened to me @steve51 after my second stroke at the age of 38, friends just melted away but you know what I made new ones, but it's not easy as you get older @caitswildecake good luck with your plans for your future you go for it and make it happen !
    my advice is given freely and is correct to the best of my knowledge.
  • Chloe_ScopeChloe_Scope Scope Posts: 10,652 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @caitswildecake and thank you for taking the time to share this with us. It must have been such a scary time and the adjustments will have had a huge impact.

    I hope the community can give you a space to meet others who you can relate to and get to know people. :)

    If there is anything we can do to help then please just let us know!
    Community Partner
    Scope

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  • janer1967janer1967 Member Posts: 9,343 Disability Gamechanger
    Hi @caitswildecake Welcome to the community and first of all well done on beating the cancer, however I understand your feelings at the side affects you now face.

    I am also a wheelchair user and like many others since becoming disabled it certainly makes you realise who your real friends are I think in some cases they cant deal with seeing how you are and they don't realise the challenges it brings.

    It is good you are thinking of new opportunities to learn and help others as well and I wish you luck

    We are always here for a chat
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