Pension sharing

Lollo

Hi, I am Claire. I am 57 years old and was born with x-linked hypophosphataemic rickets. I taught in secondary schools for over 20 years and until I had to have limb reconstruction surgery. I left teaching in 2013 and was awarded an ill health pension in 2019. At £1200, it was just about enough to live on. Following 33 years of marriage I divorced my husband who had become increasingly abusive. In Family Court my husband was awarded 42% of my pension in a pension sharing order. Leaving me with £750 per month to live on, whilst he works full time as an architect.
I have a change.org petition going to try to change the law for others who will find themselves in the same position. It is too late for me but we can prevent other disabled people losing their security. 

janer1967

Hi and welcome 

I am sorry to hear your issues and really feel for you 

My situation is bit different but seems the whole divorce and financial situation needs review 

My husband left me after he committed adultery for 3 years I want to divorce him but it is the person who files for divorce that pays the cost and I dont see why I should pay for his betrayal 


It's all unfair 

Ross_Scope

Hello @Lollo

Welcome to the community, thanks for introducing yourself and I'm sorry to hear about what you've been through.

You mentioned your husband had become increasingly abusive, I'm sorry to hear this and I'm glad you're separated from him now. Was the abuse reported and dealt with at the time?

woodbine

hi @Lollo welcome to scope, are we getting both sides of the story as it seems strange that he is getting part of your income whilst he works full time in what I assume is a well paid job?

Lollo

Yes, very well paid but according to him, he doesn't have much of a pension. My income (pension) is shared now despite the fact that he is still working. 

woodbine

@Lollo are you claiming any benefits to top up your pension?

Lollo

I am only entitled to pip I believe but I have been attempting to get advice from citizens advice. They are only doing telephone service and I have twice waited ages in the queue and been cut off. Thank you though, it is an avenue I need to look at more seriously now. I had a break down after the family court hearing so I have been useless but am getting better. 

janer1967

Hi try welfare rights they may be able to help 

Lollo

Trying to reply to Ross... Not sure how this site works.... So, yes I reported the domestic abuse to my solicitor and he said that it didn't meet the bar set by the family court. Apparently the bar is set very high and there is no special allowance made for the victim being disabled. My ex would regularly shove me and, due to my disability I would fall over. He knew that I would fall, that is why he did it. He threw stuff at me. There was years of coercive control and he rammed through a locked door when he was drunk with his electric guitar. I had locked the door because he was violent. I had two police reports. The police told me to move out of the family home for my own safety and tagged my phone. All this and I didn't meet the bar for domestic abuse. 

Lollo

Janer1967 I agree with you, the divorce process is a mess. My solicitor did not tell me that I would have to give my ex my pension until it was pointed out by my husbands barrister. My advice, if you are safe, stay put. It cost me £12,000 and that was without representation in court. If you do go down the divorce route, message me and I will tell you the solicitor I used so that you can avoid him. 

janer1967

I have been divorced twice before and I did it myself without any legal input so will do the same again 

I know enough legal info to get me by and that he wont contest the divorce he has no defence as he has fathered 2 children with her so cant deny anything 

As others have said try see if there are any benefits you can claim