Hi, my name is tinathomas! Any ideas how to help our daughter cope with communicating with friends?

tinathomas

Hi I have a daughter with cp she is 28 years old we are having problems with her she has a mobile phone and if some of her friends don’t answer she gets angry and cries and swears a lot it can go on for hours tI’ll the person answers her wondering if any one has any idea to help us 

Caz_Alumni

Hi @tinathomas Welcome to the community!

Good to have you with us, though I'm sorry to hear about your daughter's frustrations with not being able to get in touch with her friends. Just to let you know, to try and generate some ideas from our community members, I've just tweaked the title of your post a little bit, to give the community an idea of your query.

Is this something that has come about quite recently? I'm just wondering if it's something specific that has triggered the issue? Or is it something that's been going on for a while. What has your daughter (sorry I don't know her name, if you do want to share that with us?) said about being upset about by this? 

I know you've also mentioned that your daughter has Cerebral palsy (CP), and so I wondered if you were looking to link up with other community members with experience of CP? If so, you might want to have a look at our Cerebral palsy page or have a chat to our Specialist Advisor @Richard_Scope.

Other than that, I was going to ask what else have you been doing so far to help your daughter manage her emotions around her relationships with friends? Has anything helped at all? And how are you coping? I'm sure you're doing all you can to help your daughter. But I hope you're managing to look after yourselves as well?

chiarieds

Hi @tinathomas - & welcome to the community. I'm sorry about the problems you're having with your daughter. Could she perhaps arrange a time to ring her friends, or ask them to ring her at a set time. That way she would have some certainty as to when she would be able to speak to them. Just a thought, as it must be distressing you both.

Richard_Scope

Hi @tinathomas
Thanks for posting and it's good to meet you. When your daughter calms down from an outburst have you had a conversation as to what is making her so upset? May I ask is CP your daughter's only disability? 
Does she feel she's missing out or being ignored? 
It would be worth considering some Mindfulness techniques to help manage her emotional control. In some people with CP the emotional control centre of the brain can also be affected, due to the brain injury that is the cause of the CP 

tinathomas

Hi thanks for getting back to Jess has learning difficulties aswell she is fine most of the time only when her friends don’t text her straight away or phi e her when they say so I have asked why she says she has to in a way I think it’s become a habit for her 
Any ideas to help would be good thanks Tina 

Richard_Scope

Hi @tinathomas if you click on the Mindfulness link that I shared above, it might give you some ideas as to how you can help your daughter manage her emotions before they get to boiling point. I would also keep reminding her that people can't always answer the phone or reply to a text straight away but that doesn't mean they are not her friends or that they don't want to communicate with her.