Does Anyone Think I'm Selfish? Please Read

oldngrumpy
oldngrumpy Scope Member Posts: 228 Empowering
in Coffee lounge

Scope and Smoking Partner

Folks I need some opinions...

I have never smoked. My Mother and Father R.I.P. love them both were both heavy smokers. My Dad had a works medical. He was warned abt his smoking. That night in the 1980s he had his last cigarette.
My Mom bless her also smoked but she was housebound and she used to say it was the only pleasure she had in life.
My brother who I currently live with also smokes heavy...

As much as I want a girl in my life, I never could take on a girl who smoked.
No I am not being selfish!
I have a bad cough caused by a real thick neck. I have sleep apnoea because of this.
Smoke affects the way I breathe. When I have been in a room of smokers I literally get a smokers cough. I breathe real heavy. My breathing sounds like someone is throttling me.

I know I am looking after no.1 but I am sounding very selfish. But I got to look after my own health.      I complained to my brother about smoke affecting me... he said I was being selfish

Opinions please folks?


Comments

  • janer1967
    janer1967 Community member Posts: 21,922 Championing
    You are not being selfish at all but if in your brothers house then that is his place to do as he wants 

    I am a smoker but respect others wishes and I only smoke outside even in my own house 

    Your brother should be concerned for your health and maybe try and accommodate more restrict his smoking to one room where you don't go in maybe 
  • Cress
    Cress Community member Posts: 1,005 Trailblazing
    I don't think you're being selfish at all.
    Obviously you don't like smokers, so unlikely you would be attracted to a lady who smoked...unlikely, but not impossible, my last partner had the same view, but love must indeed be blind as he didn't even noticed I smoked for a few weeks and being as irresistible as I am, it was never an issue...lol
    I have to say though that smokers have restrictions on where they can smoke so I can fully understand your brother  being a bit peeved you've complained of his habit whilst living in his house...
    Crack a window open, leave the room...leave the house...
    You did ask...lol 
  • Cress
    Cress Community member Posts: 1,005 Trailblazing
    Just to add your comment 'I could never take on a girl who smoked' just bugs the hell out of me...
    I'll get over it... :D

  • Duninn
    Duninn Community member Posts: 184 Empowering
    Hell no - I used to smoke but stopped because I didn’t want to be asked to leave the pub and sit outside when the ban came in.  I did not believe I smelled like that, I couldn’t believe I could breath so much better - I come from a family of smokers (8).  No if they visit they go outside, when it’s raining to the garage with the door open.  Am I selfish, no. Your brother feels you are, it’s his issue let him deal with it
  • tonyt
    tonyt Community member Posts: 7 Listener
    Think of roy Castle he never smoked  died of lung cancer from passive smoking,
    I myself have never smoked i remember watching tv as a kid through a layer of smoke in the room, from mam dad and brothers.
    If i get a cough it lingers i was told at 54 i had the lung capacity of a 68 yr old.
    The least he could do is go outside for a smoke.
  • Cress
    Cress Community member Posts: 1,005 Trailblazing
    So the brother may not be a Saint, but I don't think that makes him a sinner.
    It is his home and the op would have been aware of his smoking habit prior to moving in.

  • Sandy_123
    Sandy_123 Scope Member Posts: 56,773 Championing
    Thats a bit of a tough one if your living in his house. I don't smoke but I don't stop others smoking around me, I couldn't do it in a unventilated room, I was born with bad lungs so smoke is a irritant to me, as long as a window is open or preferably out side. 

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