Difficult school with my 4 year old son

Shazza1986

Hi my son started school in September and was in hospital in October and has been diagnosed with type 1 diabetes and has some behaviour problems too his school isn't managing well especially with his diabetes his doctor has said he's has world development delay but is being assessed for ASD and adhd is there anything I can do to help him with school so he's not being left out or being put outside because they can't deal with him or keeping him off he has a health care plan in place thank you for reading I'm just getting fed up xxx

Adrian_Scope

Hello @Shazza1986. Does your son have 1-1 support recommended in his plan? He definitely shouldn't be being left out or put aside as they should be looking for ways to include him. Have you spoken to the school SENCO about your concerns?

Shazza1986

I've asked for a 1-1 but for some reason they don't listen to me my sons pediatrician is having a talk with the school as soon as they go back x 

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Shazza1986

@mrMwa thanks sorry for the late reply he is in mainstream school they have told me that they are looking for a 1-1 for him so I'm hoping it's going to get better but I think I'm going to look into a specialist school for him I'm lucky my neighbour has a young son who goes to one so been chatting to them about it too xx

L_Volunteer

Hi @Shazza1986

Thanks for reaching out to us. I always appreciate how much courage it must take to reach out. I am sorry to hear you and your son are experiencing such a tough time, especially with the school.

I want to thank everyone who has already responded to you because they have been amazing. Sometimes it is lovely to just hear from people with similar experiences, isn't it? Just to clarify, does your son have an EHCP? If so, the school legally has to follow the supports listed.

In terms of supporting him with school, I'm sure you are already doing all of the practical things, like fighting his corner. Just to add though, I would recommend identifying his triggers and supporting him to address his triggers, looking at any work sent home or the relevant curriculum (EFYS/National Curriculum), and identifying where his needs would best be addressed.

Additionally, I am wondering if you are able to attend any hobbies with him? This would just ensure he is able to meet people of a similar age and with similar interests. I think it is just as important to make sure his social needs are being met as well as his well-being/pastoral needs and academic needs.

Please be patient with yourself too though. I can appreciate just how difficult this must be for you. How are you managing? Please know we are here to support you just as much as we are to help you to navigate the system for your son.

Some resources you may also find useful include:

- IPSEA (https://www.ipsea.org.uk/)
- Diabetes (https://www.diabetes.org.uk/)
- Mencap (https://www.mencap.org.uk/learning-disability-explained/conditions/global-development-delay)
- National Autistic Society (https://www.autism.org.uk/)
- ADHD Foundation (https://adhdfoundation.org.uk/) 

I hope this helps but if you need anything we are here and we are listening to you 

Shazza1986

@L_Volunteer thank you so much xxx is ehcp a health care plan its been changing weekly his diabetes nurse's are going back to school soon to retrain some teachers and give them more information and we have a video call with the pediatrician and School next week so fingers crossed it will get easier we go to a few clubs with a few people in them he doesn't like too much noise he wears his headphones alot xx

L_Volunteer

Hey @Shazza1986

An EHCP does indeed include a health care plan but it should also include education. The full name is an education and health care plan.

If it doesn't, I'd encourage you to try and get one as it could explain why things are a little uncoordinated and unsupported!

To get one if you need to, I would encourage you to talk to your son's SENCO and/or classroom teacher in the first instance. If they are less than supportive then you could apply directly through the local authority.

I am really glad to hear your son's diabetes nurses are going back to school to help educate them about diabetes! It is a good sign that the school wants to help but are lacking the appropriate knowledge, experience, or confidence. 

Good luck with the meeting. How are you currently feeling about the meeting?

I'm autistic so all I can say is I agree with not liking a lot of noise and preferring headphones! 

As always, if you have any questions, need anything to be clarified, or need any further support we are here for you 

Shazza1986

Thank you for your your help I asked the teacher about a ehcp and he had the educational psychologist round today to do a ehcp and she definitely felt like he needed 1 to 1 support so it's all in the process now thank you so much xxx wouldn't of know any of this for him xx

L_Volunteer

Hi @Shazza1986

Thanks for your response. Just like @Teddybear12 said, I am really glad we were able to help. I hope your son receives the support he needs soon! If you stumble across any more questions, please don't hesitate to ask 

Tori_Scope

Great news, well done for sticking with it @Shazza1986 Keep us updated with how he gets on!

Shazza1986

Well after me writing on here my sons school are making my son part time now could I put him in a  specialised School before the Ehcp he's missing out on so much he's been excluded from trips and partys already I'm fighting constantly for him feels like I'm fighting a losing battle thank you for reading my rant xx

Alex_Alumni

Hi @Shazza1986 you're quite welcome to rant, I'm sorry to hear, it sounds very frustrating.

How is your son managing things at the moment? Have you heard anymore about the EHCP- you said it was in progress? 

Shazza1986

He has some good days in school and Friday he had a very bad day he lashes out on everyone hot a few teachers we are only at the beginning of the Ehcp he's was reviewed by the educational psychologist Thursday so just waiting to hear now x

L_Volunteer

Hey @Shazza1986

Thanks for continuing to reach out and let us know about your progress. Your best bet would be to contact your local authority in the first instance! I would also advise you to identify why your son is lashing out. I believe behaviours always have a trigger.

Depending on how long these informal exclusions are for and how far in advance the head writes to you, it could also be unlawful. IPSEA also has some information about informal exclusions that you might find useful. If you are interested in exploring this further, you can find the information at https://www.ipsea.org.uk/informal-exclusions.

We will always listen to you and hope the EHCP will help! Sending you hugs. You are doing the best you can 

Shazza1986

Thank you so much just read this site it was very helpful thank you xxx ❤️ 

L_Volunteer

Hey @Shazza1986

Thanks for your response. I am glad it was helpful. If you need any clarification or any further support, please remember we are always here for you. I hope things improve for you soon!