Does anybody know of how i can have sex comfortably as a person with gender dysphoria?

LcmonBlxss_Eclxpse

im really struggling with this issue as a transman. I really want to be able to intimately connect with my partner but it seems very difficult, if not impossible. I mean...I would never do sex having to do with a vagina anyway due to vaginismus but I'm open to ****. However, this is where my problem lies. I have really bad dysphoria and am not fond of being naked at all, let alone in front of my partner. I just dislike my body to the point where its painful to think about being touched down there even though I enjoy it. I've also not been able to masturbate due to this and I want some help figuring out how to go about these activities. Any advice?

LcmonBlxss_Eclxpse

sorry i didnt know it would blur it out but the **** is the word a n a l 

Ross_Alumni

Hello @LcmonBlxss_Eclxpse

Thanks for posting and speaking so honestly about this. 

Have you spoken with your partner about your concerns? Sex and intimacy can be a difficult subject for many people to broach, but you might find that once you take that first step and start a conversation, it becomes easier to open up from there on.

Additionally, you might find that speaking with your partner about these things will help them to help you, if that makes sense. If they understand how you feel, and what you want from a partner, then they might find it easier to support you. If these conversations are too hard for you to have, you could seek some counselling to have them in a controlled and professional environment.

Regarding masturbation, perhaps you might find it easier to take things one step at a time. Often when we think about the end goal and what we want to do, we can forget about the journey to getting there. What I mean is that if you take things gradually and only do what you are comfortable with, then over time you might feel better about it.