23 year old disabled man, don't know if I will ever find a relationship

Jack_Humphries_98 · July 2022

Hi Everyone!

It's been awhile, honestly when I posted this I didn't expect to get this much support. Just wanted to pop on and say thanks! Since this was posted I've done a lot of reflection and come to the conclusion that my longing for a relationship was boarding on unhealthy. I kept seeing it as a quick way as validation for my existence, I never really liked myself, not for a long time.`I'm not all the way there in terms of confidence but I'm getting there. Focusing more on hobbies now and just staying happy. Thanks again!

Ross_Alumni · July 2022

Jack_Humphries_98 said:

Hi Everyone!

It's been awhile, honestly when I posted this I didn't expect to get this much support. Just wanted to pop on and say thanks! Since this was posted I've done a lot of reflection and come to the conclusion that my longing for a relationship was boarding on unhealthy. I kept seeing it as a quick way as validation for my existence, I never really liked myself, not for a long time.`I'm not all the way there in terms of confidence but I'm getting there. Focusing more on hobbies now and just staying happy. Thanks again!

Thank you for getting back to us and providing an update on how you feel, it's good that you have ben able to reflect and it appears as though you have had a change in mindset

I hope that you found the replies on the community helpful, and I look forward to seeing you hopefully take part more

confusednewt · November 2022

I just wanted to comment, also disabled Wheelchair user. I recently broke up with my partner of almost 2 years and because a chair user in that relationship as my health started declining. I often think now who will want me after this? I’m a bit older so 28 and the majority of my friends are all in long term relationships with mortgages and pets etc. But I think, I have a lot to give and I can’t see my chair as a hold back as that doesn’t limit my ability to love or be loved! It’s just finding others that understand and respect you. I’ve learnt from this breakup that I actually want and need whichever type of romantic relationship with someone in the future to be with a fellow disabled person with experience of mental health, because even though my ex could sympathise - as an able bodied neurotypical person they ultimately didn’t understand me or educate themselves on my conditions to help me, or even reach out to anyone and get support for themselves to help the relationship/communication so I think on the surface relationships can all look great on social media and even friends sometimes but it’s hard to see them behind closed doors and it’s a lot of work emotionally and physically and I think finding Friendships first is the best way as they can become relationships!