Hi, my name is wiserlady!

wiserlady
wiserlady Community member Posts: 9 Listener
edited April 2022 in Start here and say hello!
Hi, this is my first time here. It would be good to get to know you. I am a lady of 64, struggling with disability and being housebound. It gets very lonely -  I have a good brain so don't need advice like invite your friends around.  There are no local friends. I keep busy but it gets boring and lonely.

Comments

  • Ross_Alumni
    Ross_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,611 Championing
    Hello @wiserlady

    Welcome to the community, I hope you are well and have had a nice start to the weekend.

    Sorry to hear that you have experienced loneliness, hopefully taking part in this community can be a positive outlet for you and help to relieve those feelings. We are a nice bunch so feel free to have a look around and ask any questions that come to mind :) 
  • wiserlady
    wiserlady Community member Posts: 9 Listener
    Hi Ross, many thanks for that reply. Hope you are well and having a good day. The loneliness cannot be solved, this is what people do not understand, if you have no local friends you cannot invite them over. They do not exist. I would be the first person to think of inviting them over on a day I am not busy if I knew someone who was a friend.
  • Sparklebright63
    Sparklebright63 Scope Member Posts: 171 Contributor
    Hi to you  wiserlady,

    Welcome to the Forum its really informative.

    I am in a similar situation as to yourself but I do look after my grandchildren 3 days aweek and they R hallarious and make me laugh most of the time (tho not sometimes) it is really hard especially when I am dealing with lots of medical conditions at once.
    Hope you R well and we can make friends here.

    Sparklebright63.
  • wiserlady
    wiserlady Community member Posts: 9 Listener
    Hi Sparkle. Wow you are busy.  I often go a month or more before I see anyone other than my husband. Bless him. Like you say life can be hard when dealing with a lot of medical conditions. It's good you feel up to spending so much time with the little ones and a change of pace andr something distracting. I don't have kids or grandkids etc.
  • SueHeath
    SueHeath Community member Posts: 12,388 Championing
    Hi @wiserlady welcome to this great group.
    I am sure you will benefit from being a member of our great community.
    We have lots going on from chats, debates, games, hobbies, art and crafts.

    When you get chance have a look around you can join in any of the chats/threads or start your own.
    Any problems some one will always help you out.

    Some of us pop in and out of the site during the day, but i am sure you will be greeted by some of the others soon.
  • Jo_2022
    Jo_2022 Community member Posts: 295 Empowering
    Hi @wiserlady! 😊 Sending you a virtual wave 👋. I hope you are having a nice day?

    Thank you for reaching out. I am sorry you feel lonely, and have to cope with your disability alone. 

    If you don’t mind, have you thought of joining a Telephone Befriending Service? You might like to have a look at this link:  https://archwayfoundation.org.uk/

    Best wishes! 
  • POGGYFLOSS
    POGGYFLOSS Scope Member Posts: 39 Contributor
    Hello you may be my twin!same age, same struggles, same lack of local friends,
     same belief and confidence in my brain power even if I don't use it very often! Only difference is that I'm not particularly outgoing anyway although for anyone catching me on the phone these days when Iv'e not seen anyone would probably think otherwise but then I've always been able to talk a lot! :)

  • wiserlady
    wiserlady Community member Posts: 9 Listener
    Hi and thanks for the response. Maybe we should get to know each other better and see if we have more in common and take it from there, just an idea. I know what you mean about being chatty if youve not seen anyone but I would not bother to chat to just anyone about anything - if I bump into the lady from next door she wants me to stand there for an hour while she tells me about all the people she knows who have become ill, become more ill, gone into hospital, had an operation or died, prefer something a bit more upbeat and interesting and where both take part rather than me just listen!! lol.
  • wiserlady
    wiserlady Community member Posts: 9 Listener
    Jo_2022 said:
    Hi @wiserlady! 😊 Sending you a virtual wave 👋. I hope you are having a nice day?

    Thank you for reaching out. I am sorry you feel lonely, and have to cope with your disability alone. 

    If you don’t mind, have you thought of joining a Telephone Befriending Service? You might like to have a look at this link:  https://archwayfoundation.org.uk/

    Best wishes! 
    Thanks so much. Am not alone, have a lovely husband, but no other family or friends at all. He is the only person I usually get to see or speak to.
  • leeCal
    leeCal Community member Posts: 7,537 Championing
    edited April 2022
    Some people talk to plants of course, they’re always ready to listen and never suggest sub par ideas.

    whatever happened to budgies, they were supposed to be good companions too.
  • wiserlady
    wiserlady Community member Posts: 9 Listener
    Yes, I talk to my little dog and she sort of talks back.  Nothing is the same as talking to a person you know and whose company you like and where they are someone you have a bond with.  Talking to the next door neighbour is nowhere near as good. And if you are not careful can turn into them doing all the talking and you just listening to a load of stuff you dont care about or understand. And don't try online chat rooms. All you get is a lot of sex starved men trying to get you to do and say what they want so they can feel better!
  • leeCal
    leeCal Community member Posts: 7,537 Championing
    Personally I’ve never tried a chat room and thankfully this isn’t one. We do get the odd person trying to look for ‘love’ but very rarely. All in all it’s a very friendly community which I’ve enjoyed being on for some time now. 🙂
  • wiserlady
    wiserlady Community member Posts: 9 Listener
    edited April 2022
    These guys I mentioned were not interested in love, just sex and very coarse. 

    Urgh.  There are placs they can go for all that if they pay, they were trying to save money. The trouble with looking for friends online is that predators and selfish people like to think you are so desperate that you will put up with anyone on any terms.

  • Alex_Alumni
    Alex_Alumni Scope alumni Posts: 7,538 Championing
    edited April 2022
    Hi @wiserlady and a warm welcome to the community, it's great to have you here. I can see you're already enjoying chatting with our members.

    I've just removed some of the formatting in your last post, where it was underlined, so that it's easier for those who have visual impairments to read. Don't worry you haven't done anything wrong :)

    As @leeCal says, thankfully this isn't the kind of chat room you've previously experienced, and I hope the community here is a welcoming and supportive place for you.

    I'm sure that any of our members who have experienced chat rooms, or any kind of online dating- especially as a woman, can relate to your description, as they can make you feel very vulnerable at times. If you ever feel like chatting about it you can always head over to our Dating, Sex and Relationships category, and start a new discussion.

    If you need a hand with anything please do ask.

    Alex