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SUSPECTED ADHD very nervous about meeting with psychiatrist

Brian1987

Hi everyone. I’m 35 and decided to go to the doctors about the chaotic life I’ve been living.

Told him the truth about my struggle with keeping jobs (been sacked from every job I’ve ever had) and trouble with relationships, keeping friends, finances, day to day life etc etc etc. Enough is enough basically. Told him about how hyper i am all the time and i started to realise this might be something to do with all the problems I’m constantly facing.
Turns out he says that I’ve been forwarded to a psychiatrist and I’ve just completed a form for SUSPECTED ADHD.

Funny thing is I’m not usually too nervous about things and can just get on with it but I’m now at the lowest point in my life and EVERYTHING seems to worry me and make me anxious. I’m starting to think that I’ll never hold down a job long enough to have some nice things in my life again and hold down a relationship to start a family of my own and basically just be settled and ‘normal’….

So Basically…

I feel like if I’m on a good day I could walk into the meeting and make out that my life is all going to work out and not really explain to them what’s been happening in detail????? I’m constantly thinking do i tell them certain things like how I’ve had a problem with addictions in my life (although I’ve overcame these problems now) as they might just think my life’s in this mess becouse of that. I’m just not wanting to mess up any help that i can receive to live a fullfill life!!!

Anybody that has been diagnosed with ADHD as an adult any help would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks Brian…

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Comments

SteveKC

Hi Brian, and thanks for being so open. I had my first psychiatric meeting online in December last having been referred by my GP, like you. I had to complete another questionnaire and, they provided me with two other similar questionnaires, one for a person who i had known for the past few months, to confirm, I guess that person's view and another for my parent(s) to check out if my behaviour has been with me since infancy. So don't be surprised if that happens to you too.
As for your concerns about addiction or other behaviors you may feel embarrassed or uncomfortable with, it is not unusual for ADHDers to have had some problems with these too. But I'll leave it to you as to your feeling comfortable admitting any of that. Psychiatry appears to be very sympathetic and empathic in that regard. All the very best with your session and hope all goes well.

All the very best, Brian, and many thoughts...

Brian1987

Thanks for the speedy reply Steve.

I’ve actually already had those questionnaires and they have been sent back. I phoned the mental health team last week and they said that i had been accepted for a appointment with a psychiatrist so I’m just waiting for a letter.
If you don’t mind me asking, with you saying it was online was this a video chat with your psychiatrist then? And i don’t actually mind telling anyone about my life (another thing i do tell people my life story and hardly know them lol) it’s just i don’t want the psychiatrist to think my life’s in a mess becouse of addictions as this was years ago.

Also after your initial meeting with psychiatrist did you have or not have a diagnosis? Sorry for all the questions just not sure who to turn to to ask the questions!!

Thanks again Brian.

Ross_Alumni

Hello @Brian1987

Welcome to the community, thank you for joining us and being so honest about what you have been through.

Do you know when you will be seeing the psychiatrist? It might be worth keeping a mood diary up until then and writing down how you have felt and what you have struggled with. In the moment, it can be easy to try and lessen the extent of problems out of fear of what somebody else might think or because we happen to be feeling really good on that day, but it's definitely important to be as honest with them as you have been here and talk about your experiences. It will enable them to support you as best as they can.

Regarding what you mentioned about addiction, I'm glad to read that you overcame those problems, you should be very proud of yourself

This is a very supportive and welcoming site to be a part of so I’m sure you’ll find it to be a positive outlet, feel free to have a look around and get involved wherever you’d like 😊 A few notable pages I’d recommend visiting would be:

The virtual coffee lounge which is one of our categories, in which we play games and talk about general subjects such as hobbies and interests
The recent discussions page, which shows an overview of everything happening across the community
The categories page, which shows a full list of discussion groups on the community

If you have any questions at all then don’t hesitate to ask.

SteveKC

I guess , as it was, December last year my ADHD unit only offered online unless I wanted to wait until their rules enabled actual face2face, so yes as I wanted to expedite it was online video. It's been no problem at all. Each month I see him as I asked for medication rather than any other options and, consequently my dose increased month by month until we agreed there were no side effects. Too high a dose can introduce them or make them too uncomfortable to experience. The information leaflet is pretty exhaustive of the range of side effects reported in the past.
As for the addiction, I was similar in that I enjoyed alcohol and recreational drugs some time ago. 'Though I still enjoy the former but some meds can expect to have no or very little alcohol as it can magnify the side effects on the meds I'm on. Unsure about the impact of alcohol with other meds...
I'm seeing mine again tomorrow morning to discuss my trying another medication as the one I have, for me, we are, after all, unique, calms me down, reduces anxiety etc. but doesn't give me the focus I expected. It was joining SCOPE that I received welcoming reassurance encouraging that change of medication so tomorrow at 10 am, here goes for me...

All I can say is people here and the psychiatry profession are there for you...

Finally, the first session the psychiatrist appeared to run through the questionnaire, I suppose to clarify, as he had 3 different versions to consider and it was odd details that he needed clearing up but he agreed he had diagnosed me from the questionnaire already...

I hope that helps, Brian...

Steve

Brian1987

Hi Ross thank you for the reply

well i don’t have a date yet I’m just waiting on a letter.

I’ve actually been keeping notes on my phone for the last month of times when i think things have effected my day and what has happened so I’m doing that already!

And I think you are right in the end we can’t really go wrong with the truth I think it can feel like a big deal being told you have to speak to a psychiatrist in the first place, but the only way is up as they say.

And thank you for the kind words reguarding my recovery very much appreciated

SteveKC

I must amend my reference to SCOPE members reassurance and say they encouraged me TO DISCUSS a change of medication

SORRY...

sTEVE

Brian1987

@SteveKC thanks for all the information mate it’s appreciated.

Brian1987

@SteveKC what is SCOPE? Sorry just realised it’s this website thanks again buddy…

L_Volunteer

Hi @Brian1987. Welcome to Scope's forum. It is great to see you have joined us.

I am really glad to see our community members have already responded to you and supported you.

If you do need anything else though, please don't hesitate to give us a shout

Tori_Scope

Hi @Brian1987

I just wanted to see how you've been doing since we last spoke with you. How have things been over the past week?

D2323

Hi Brian, it took me until the age of 44 to get a diagnosis.

First off because I am a recovering addict the services were apprehensive about an ADHD diagnosis.

(I was a chronic addict with many problems so I can see why they weren't so keen)

One of my biggest barriers was trying to get past Gp's, but you are past that.

So after around 3 years of arguing with them I was diagnosed with ADHD.

The consultant/psychiatrist will be cool with you (unlike normal people who may not know what to make of you, in my own case anyway!)

Should just be a chat for a while and perhaps a QB test (a button pressing exercise)

Hope this sheds some light on it for you.

D23

Tori_Scope

I had a quick look online, and it seems like it's used to assess the person's concentration, movement, and impulsivity @Biblioklept

I'm sure @D2323 will be able to share a bit more about it though!

Do you mind me asking whether you're receiving enough support to help you with your recovery @D2323? I can imagine it isn't easy.

helpfulCity734

Hi Brian,

First of all, well done for taking that step to speak with your doctor—it’s such a big deal, and I totally get how nerve-wracking it can be. I was diagnosed at 37, and I remember feeling the exact same mix of nerves and relief.

You mentioned worrying about how you’ll come across during the appointment—honestly, just be as open as you can. Even if you’re having a good day during the session, try to give them the full picture of what life is like for you, including the tough moments. I found keeping a notebook (or using my phone) to jot down examples of struggles really helpful—it made it easier to explain my challenges without forgetting anything in the moment.

As for your past addiction issues, I totally get why you’re hesitant to bring it up. But ADHD and addiction often go hand in hand—many of us turn to substances as a way of coping before we even know we have ADHD. Psychiatrists are usually very understanding about this and won’t dismiss your current struggles because of your past. If anything, it might help them piece things together and offer the right support.

When it comes to getting diagnosed and treated, I had a great experience going private through Attention to Health. They were supportive, non-judgmental, and really helped me understand myself better. If you're nervous about the process or the wait times for NHS options, they might be worth considering.

Whatever happens, this is a step towards living a more settled and fulfilling life. It’s not about becoming “normal,” but about learning how your brain works and finding ways to work with it, not against it. You’ve already done the hardest part by reaching out and asking for help—so give yourself credit for that!

Good luck, and let us know how it goes. You’re not alone in this.

Claire

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